Responding to Challenges in Raising Children

morningstar

Thu, May 18 2006, 3:46 pm

As parents, inevitably we find that it is more challenging to parent some of our children than others. Sometimes the difficulty is rooted in ourselves and our lives-- where we are at a given time. Sometimes the difficulty is rooted in the child, who possesses certain qualities that we find difficult to handle. And sometimes, it is simply the "goodness of fit" between the parent and child. A very structured child, inflexible child is going to get on the nerves of a relaxed, easygoing parent, while a child who is a free spirit is going to have a hard time in a strictly regimented household. And yet the same child in a different household might not have been a challenge at all.

With a bit of luck, mother and father take different approaches, ( which I why I think children benefit not from mother and father parenting identically, but from them being consistent in how they handle differences of opinion and respectful of each others approaches).

Would love to hear how others have dealt with the child that is particularly challenging.

timeout

Thu, May 18 2006, 3:59 pm

My son is 4-1/2 k'h and challenging would be a mild word for me the only way to cope with stress I.e. whining and intolerable behavior is keeping a very structured household where my son knows what to expect so we keep outbursts to a minimum.

I know my son needs alot of drinks and dinner on the table by 5:30pm, he also needs to be in bed by the latest 7:30pm or else he becomes unreasonable.

Each day is really a challenge and as long as I can take a deep breath, leave the room and have a cup of coffee or be able to just take a break when I need to than I'm doing ok Very Happy

By the way I also have a 2 year old daughter that I'm home with all day. Being a Stay At Home Mom is not as easy as I thought it would be Wink

Tefila

Sun, Jun 25 2006, 2:36 am

Quote:

With a bit of luck, mother and father take different approaches, ( which I why I think children benefit not from mother and father parenting identically, but from them being consistent in how they handle differences of opinion and respectful of each others approaches).

Oh I so agree Thumbs Up

Motek

Sun, Jun 25 2006, 11:07 am

morningstar wrote:

Sometimes the difficulty is rooted in ourselves and our lives-- where we are at a given time. Sometimes the difficulty is rooted in the child, who possesses certain qualities that we find difficult to handle. And sometimes, it is simply the "goodness of fit" between the parent and child.

And sometimes, parents are (maybe well-meaning but) clueless about how to parent properly.

happymom

Sun, Jun 25 2006, 11:14 am

Quote:

And sometimes, parents are (maybe well-meaning but) clueless about how to parent properly.

thats so true . and unfortunately there are many that don't think about this fact, and just keep doing whatever comes natural in parenting (which ISN'T good parenting at all!!!) and then they wonder why their kids are acting up, having problems etc....

I Think its good for all parents to be open to learn new parenting techniques and if ure kid is having a problem, maybe the way u are parenting for this kid doesn't work etc... we need to work on ourselves to be good parents! it doesn't always just "come".