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Speechless in Boro Park
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red sea




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 12:33 am
how do you know it was a non kosher truck, some of the trucks have a hechsher sign in the window even for the soft ice cream, maybe the mom taught the abysitter who she can buy from? did u go up to the truck and check it out? I mean sure its possble tho,
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mumsy23




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 12:56 am
I was recently in Baskin-robbins buying ice-cream and I saw a non jewish sitter with frum kids and she asked them what flavor they want and one said "marshmallow!" (which is not a kosher flavor) and she bought it for them! shock
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goldrose




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 9:42 am
I think the bottom line and point of this thread is that you cannot trust your children with a non jewish babysitter. And if you have no choice but to use a [gentile], you have to be very, very clear about your standards and what she may/may not give your children.
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Motek




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 5:43 pm
mumsy23 wrote:
I was recently in Baskin-robbins buying ice-cream and I saw a non jewish sitter with frum kids and she asked them what flavor they want and one said "marshmallow!" (which is not a kosher flavor) and she bought it for them! shock


and???????

crayon wrote:
Sometimes that's not an option, sometimes the expense is much greater


Perhaps mesirus nefesh to raise one's children in our day and age entails making the decision that non-Jewish women will not take care of Jewish children without direct supervision, no matter if Jewish women are more expensive or not available.

Anybody read "Michalina" (distr. by Feldheim) of the young Jewish girl (in Europe) who was cared for by a gentile woman and was abducted by the Catholic church who never released her shock
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Crayon210




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 5:55 pm
But if someone needs to work and cannot find another option, then what? Who will support that family?

I agree that ideally this is not the case, but ideally, moms are not forced to work outside the home if they don't want to. Sad
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stem




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 7:16 pm
I live in a small town, and believe me the number of Jewish women here is quite limited and till recently, nobody "officialy" did babysitting in her home. But, when there's a will there's a way, every year my friend (who works full time) manages with great effort to arrange child care for her children that don't involve any non-Jews. A neighbor, a friend, finally a lady decided to do babysitting in her home for the friend's children and others, and she has a nice parnasah.
In a city like NY, how is it possible to say that you can't find a nice Jewish lady to watch your kids? There must be at least one on every block!
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Motek




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 7:19 pm
Crayon210 wrote:
But if someone needs to work and cannot find another option, then what? Who will support that family?


I just don't think that most of the frum families that hire non jews or irreligious Jews to watch their children are in the position of having no other option. They may see it that way, but in the vast majority of cases I don't think it's true.

I believe that G-d helps those who are determined, with mesirus nefesh, to do the right thing.
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Crayon210




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 7:38 pm
stem, not everyone lives in New York.
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Mommy3.5




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 9:05 pm
mumsy23 wrote:
I was recently in Baskin-robbins buying ice-cream and I saw a non jewish sitter with frum kids and she asked them what flavor they want and one said "marshmallow!" (which is not a kosher flavor) and she bought it for them! shock


where I live the kosher baskin robbins does not carry the non kosher flavors.

All the ice cream trucks here, carry kosher Ice cream, Not chalav Yisrael but kosher. There is a difference between treif and non CY. I am very careful to tell my kids that we don't buy the Ice cream cuz its not CY, and if they say "oh, its not kosher?" I tell them it is kosher we just don't eat it. It is important to teach your children correctly and not to assume the worst.
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gryp




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 9:07 pm
Is it very common for people in Brooklyn not to keep Cholov Yisroel?
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stem




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 9:19 pm
Crayon210 wrote:
stem, not everyone lives in New York.


Is there another Boro Park somewhere else in the US? I thought this thread was about someone in NY, sorry if I misunderstood.
Besides, my point was that even in small towns, if there's a will there is a way.
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Motek




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 9:21 pm
GR - Sure.

Depends on your circles. Chasidim in Boro Park, Williamsburgh, and Cr. Hts. use chalav Yisrael.

Those who don't identify as Chasidim but as yeshivish are likely to use chalav Yisrael too.

There are lots of other frum Jews in Brooklyn!
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Crayon210




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jul 09 2006, 9:25 pm
Sorry stem, I was talking in general, not specifically about NY. In this case, yes, I suppose, the person could probably get a Jewish baby-sitter with ease. There could also be a lot of reasons that she didn't.
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Inspired




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 10 2006, 9:43 am
How did you know the girls were jewish?

colored??
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JRKmommy




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 10 2006, 10:15 am
We used to send dd#2 to my Jewish neighbour, who has a home daycare, but the hours were just a little short of what we needed and when ds came along it became clear that we needed a live-in nanny. Almost all of the live-in nannies here are from the Philippines - I've never seen any Jewish women here doing it. [However, there are agencies that will match families with nannies that worked for frum families, or that prev. worked in Israel.]

If you have a good nanny or cleaning lady, and make it VERY clear what the expectations are, they learn. I once hired the friend of our cleaning lady to help with the seder. She immediately asked ME what was dairy and what was meat, and was more careful than I was! I also remember that a Filippino cleaning lady got my mom (who wasn't that religious) to make Shabbat dinner when I was growing up. She had worked for a Jewish family, and said to my mom, "It's Friday. You're doing Shabbat tonight, right?"

Here are some of the things that we did:

1. I went through a whole stack of applications, and weeded out anyone that couldn't seem to write a single sentence without mentioning JC.

2. During the telephone interview, I told the nanny that we were Jewish, and explained that we didn't allow outside food in the house, we didn't eat pork or seafood, and we didn't use the telephone, computer, etc. from Friday evening to Sat. night. The lady from the nanny agency was Jewish, so she helped explain everything.

3. I prepared a binder for her with all of the family information, and included a "Jewish" page. In it, I put the basic rules - no mentioning JC, we are the only ones to teach religion to the kids, no outside food, separate milk and meat, Shabbat, etc.

4. I also went over the binder with her, and talked about everything. She had an instant crash course in Judaism b/c she arrived at the end of August, and soon learned about all the Tishrei holidays! I also soon learned that the other nannies in the area helped to fill her in - for example, they reassured her that she wouldn't starve during Pesach.

5. I do most of the cooking, so that's not an issue. She also has the weekends off, so she helps me prepare and then leaves before Shabbat starts.

6. As with all aspects of finding a babysitter - you need to really click with someone, have confidence that you can trust them, and keep an eye on what is happening with your kids. Clear expectations from the start are also a must - I did this all up front so that there wouldn't be any misunderstandings. I also come home at varying hours, and my neighbours see the nanny all the time. I've had good reports back. [Incidentally, I will tell my friends if I see anything wrong - as I did once when I had concerns about a Jewish caregiver who attended the same playgroup as we did.]
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chen




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 10 2006, 12:18 pm
Mommy3.5 wrote:
if they say "oh, its not kosher?" I tell them it is kosher we just don't eat it. It is important to teach your children correctly and not to assume the worst.


Bravo! It is important for parents to bring children up to realize that different people have different levels of observance and that just because a person's level is not as strict as your own doesn't make him tref or an apikores. you would not appreciate being called tref or an apikores because your level of observance doesn't match someone else's--and, no matter how strict you are, there is ALWAYS someone who is more medakdek than you.
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shayna82




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 10 2006, 12:31 pm
amother wrote:

Along came a non-kosher ice cream truck and the sitter bought an ice cream for each of the kids!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



the fact that the original poster wrote, non kosher ice cream truck, to me sounds like the ice cream truck itself is being judged. who said its non kosher?
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Crayon210




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 10 2006, 12:34 pm
Shayna, what does that mean? What does judging a truck mean?
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shayna82




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 10 2006, 12:38 pm
I explained that in my post.

she was already judging the issue by looking at the truck. meaning, no matter what happened with the sitter giving the kids food, the truck was already non kosher, so theres no luck that they kids may have had something kosher at all.
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Crayon210




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 10 2006, 12:40 pm
Saying "judging a truck" sounds funny, I guess. Smile
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