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Kids Speak / People Speak
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Motek




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Aug 20 2006, 1:16 pm
a description of one of Chaim Walder's Kids Speak books:

Quote:
Ages 8-11 The collected writings of children from all over the world who have shared their personal problems, their fears, their joys and their unusual problems with him, to create this book. Young readers are sure to find that they have much in common with these children, and there are many important lessons to be learned from them.


I have read both of his People Speak and have glanced at some Kids Speak stories.

I remember having a conversation yrs. ago with someone about them, her son was 10 or so at the time and she was quite surprised that I wasn't gung-ho about them.

I can see having a story about a shy child, for example, being very good for someone suffering from shyness, but when it's dozens of stories about kids with "issues," I don't think it's a good thing anymore. It involves the young reader in "issue" after "issue" and I don't think it's healthy.

Another problem I had with one of his books was a chapter about a child with a secret, who couldn't tell the awful secret etc. It was clearly alluding to molestation and I think, like a story about a shy child, it's good for a child with THAT problem, but should ALL children read this mysterious chapter about a child with a dark secret? Confused

As an adult reading People Speak, it's a similar problem. It's one sad story after another, people misunderstood, people suffering from cruelty, on and on. It's interesting reading but is it "healthy" reading? How about a book about people who communicate and are understood! who are the beneficiaries of kindness! So yes, there are books of short stories that contain some stories like that but no series that is the POSITIVE counterpart to Kids Speak / People Speak.
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miriam




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Aug 20 2006, 1:22 pm
I think it's a wonderful place for kids to learn that they are not alone in the world. I even learned things from the kids speak. There was a story about a child who was tickled for such a long period of time that they stopped breathing. I think of that story every single time I tickle someone.
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southernbubby




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Aug 20 2006, 1:22 pm
Motek, you have an interesting and insightful perspective on the series. I always thought of it as consciousness raising among frum people since people are often walking around with blinders. For example, do rich children really understand what it is like to be poor? Should they be made or assisted in understanding so that they can react more positively to children who are not lucky enough to have what they have?
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Motek




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Aug 20 2006, 1:29 pm
I'd like to hear comments from kids about the series, though it's definitely popular or there wouldn't be more and more books. I wonder whether boys like it as much as girls since generally girls are more into feelings.

I remember a boy the age the series is intended for saying he wasn't interested in reading it (having looked through it and seen what it was like). Some will analyze that as the boy not "being comfortable with feelings" and having an "issue." Perhaps there is another view though, that a teacher bringing up a sensitive topic in class with relevant Chazal and stories is wonderful, and something children would appreciate. But a book with 25 different issues (multiplied by 5 for the 5 volumes) is overkill.
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shayna82




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Aug 20 2006, 1:38 pm
I belive those books are a great publication, but I agree with you that for an 8 year old to read pages and pages of other kids with "issues" can be depressing, and uneeded. I wouldnt let me sons read them if that is the contents. They will see enough kids with issues in their life time, why read about it.
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happyone




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Aug 20 2006, 6:30 pm
My opinion is that the children that can relate to the issues you find printed, they see that they are not alone. For those without 'issues', perhaps they will appreciate what they have?!
I have bought the books for my children and have found it gave them lots of food for thought. One child commented that now she can understand what her "fat friend" feels like.
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Motek




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Aug 20 2006, 6:52 pm
update:

I had the opportunity to glance at one today. I looked at the first two stories and here's what they were about:

in the first one, the father of a child from a wealthy home who is proud of his father's money, goes out of the country. There are whispers at home, he doesn't know what's going on. Some kid in school says - your father is a thief and that's why he left the country. Long story about the father being in financial difficulties though not a thief, how the child is traumatized by this, refuses to go to school, until the happy ending.

Now tell me, do you think an 8-11 year old gains something positive from this? If so, what? Do you think it might cause a child to be very anxious if his/her father goes out of town?

Second story - much shorter. A child goes to the bathroom and tries everything he finds in the medicine cabinet, pills, liquids. He gets sick and nearly dies. Is this what you want your child reading? If so, why?
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Mommy3.5




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Aug 20 2006, 8:02 pm
motek, if thats where the stories are up to I'll have to agree with you! the first two or three books were not at all like that, I enjoyed them...but as time goes on, the author runs out of good material and begins reaching...
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mali




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 21 2006, 3:45 am
Motek wrote:
Another problem I had with one of his books was a chapter about a child with a secret, who couldn't tell the awful secret etc. It was clearly alluding to molestation and I think, like a story about a shy child, it's good for a child with THAT problem, but should ALL children read this mysterious chapter about a child with a dark secret? Confused
that particular story stresses the importance of communication.
Quote:
the father of a child from a wealthy home who is proud of his father's money, goes out of the country. There are whispers at home, he doesn't know what's going on. Some kid in school says - your father is a thief and that's why he left the country. Long story about the father being in financial difficulties though not a thief, how the child is traumatized by this, refuses to go to school, until the happy ending.
they actually made a very nice video (in Hebrew) out of this story. I think you can learn many things from it.
Quote:
A child goes to the bathroom and tries everything he finds in the medicine cabinet, pills, liquids. He gets sick and nearly dies. Is this what you want your child reading? If so, why?
to learn from someone else's mistakes.
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shalhevet




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 21 2006, 5:14 am
Yes, I think the children's stories are very good. For example the one about someone being molested doesn't give any details; just warns that he did terrible things. I certainly want my kids to know not to go with a stranger, and I think Chaim Walder tells it in a sensitive way, without going into unnecessary details.

The adult books I actually found disturbing. I read them in Hebrew, so I don't know if these stories have been translated. I bought one of the books for Chol Hamoed reading and actually stopped because I thought it might be assur to read, with all the miserable and frightening stuff in there on Yomtov. One story, which I'll never forget, tells about a young, single brother who makes a series of prank phone calls and causes his sister to miscarry after many years of infertility. These stories are true and I'm sorry I read it.

My dd who is 12 has asked a few times to read it (People Speak) and I certainly won't let her. I think it should come with some sort of warning that the material is disturbing and parental judgement should be used even for teens.
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Mama Bear




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 21 2006, 12:53 pm
mummyof6, I was also devastated by that miscarriage story. So horrible.
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morningstar




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 21 2006, 1:06 pm
A good way to use these books is to spark discussion with your children about real issues, real feelings. Walder handles "harsh reality" in a sensitive way. I would suggest going through the stories first, and then selecting one that you think is appropriate and thoughtful to read aloud to your children and then talk about together.
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mali




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Aug 21 2006, 4:30 pm
mummyof6 wrote:
One story, which I'll never forget, tells about a young, single brother who makes a series of prank phone calls and causes his sister to miscarry after many years of infertility.
I couldn't fall asleep after I read that story. Exploding anger
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healthymama




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 22 2006, 5:26 pm
Quote:
One story, which I'll never forget, tells about a young, single brother who makes a series of prank phone calls and causes his sister to miscarry after many years of infertility. These stories are true and I'm sorry I read it.


Clue me in as to how the author knows why his sister miscarried ? I have not read this but it sounds nuts.
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Tefila




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 22 2006, 5:30 pm
Though all my boys incl us parents love it there is skepticism with the validity of some of those stories Confused
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shalhevet




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 22 2006, 5:33 pm
healthymama wrote:
Quote:
One story, which I'll never forget, tells about a young, single brother who makes a series of prank phone calls and causes his sister to miscarry after many years of infertility. These stories are true and I'm sorry I read it.


Clue me in as to how the author knows why his sister miscarried ? I have not read this but it sounds nuts.


If you have read the story it doesn't sound nuts.
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Mama Bear




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 22 2006, 5:34 pm
She miscarried from fear and stress, in her fourth month. read the book.
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jewgal84




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 22 2006, 5:34 pm
healthymama wrote:
Quote:
One story, which I'll never forget, tells about a young, single brother who makes a series of prank phone calls and causes his sister to miscarry after many years of infertility. These stories are true and I'm sorry I read it.


Clue me in as to how the author knows why his sister miscarried ? I have not read this but it sounds nuts.


Curious to know mroe details too.
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mali




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 22 2006, 5:41 pm
healthymama wrote:
Quote:
One story, which I'll never forget, tells about a young, single brother who makes a series of prank phone calls and causes his sister to miscarry after many years of infertility. These stories are true and I'm sorry I read it.


Clue me in as to how the author knows why his sister miscarried ? I have not read this but it sounds nuts.
The author is the woman who miscarries, not the brother.
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jewgal84




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Aug 22 2006, 6:00 pm
So nu.. What's the story shock !!
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