At what age would you let a child get off the bus alone?

Alef Bais

Wed, Jan 04 2012, 5:52 pm

This is for mothers whose children go on varsity buses (NYC) that stop on street corners and not in front of your house.

What age would you let your child get off the bus and come home without you waiting on the corner?

(Specifically a corner where there are no streets to cross. The child has to simply turn the corner and come home.)

amother

Wed, Jan 04 2012, 6:01 pm

I live in suburban NY, have Jewish drivers and bus teachers/rebbes, and allow them to come alone at 5 years of age. In the morning I do put them on the bus myself.

Alef Bais

Wed, Jan 04 2012, 6:01 pm

kitov wrote:

Is the child the only one getting off at that stop? Is it usually a busy street or a deserted one?

Yes. It's a rather busy street, it's an avenue, there is a shul across the road where men are going for mincha usually around that time.

Alef Bais

Wed, Jan 04 2012, 6:02 pm

amother wrote:

I live in suburban NY, have Jewish drivers and bus teachers/rebbes, and allow them to come alone at 5 years of age. In the morning I do put them on the bus myself.

Does the bus stop right outside your house or down the block?

overthehill

Wed, Jan 04 2012, 6:03 pm

There are so many variables.

What time of the day
Is it Dark yet
Are other kids walking with child
what kind of neighborhood it is
whose hanging out at that time
How responsible the child is.

kitov

Wed, Jan 04 2012, 6:03 pm

Alef Bais wrote:

Seriously, amother above, why do you have to be anonymous for that post???

Because a) now you know she has a 12 yr old, b) now you know she lives in NYC, c) she mentioned it to her friend who is on imamother and doesn't want to out her SN....And maybe another reason. Some posters feel safer posting amother. At least she wasn't rude or inappropriate. Why do you care?

amother

Wed, Jan 04 2012, 6:05 pm

Alef Bais wrote:

amother wrote:

I live in suburban NY, have Jewish drivers and bus teachers/rebbes, and allow them to come alone at 5 years of age. In the morning I do put them on the bus myself.

Does the bus stop right outside your house or down the block?

Neither. My apartment is deep within the parking area, a distance from the curb where the bus drops off the kids. And shall I mention it's a Jewish community, only yidden live here, so it is different than the city.

kitov

Wed, Jan 04 2012, 6:06 pm

overthehill wrote:

There are so many variables.

What time of the day
Is it Dark yet
Are other kids walking with child
what kind of neighborhood it is
whose hanging out at that time
How responsible the child is.

I believe the dark/light factor is the first defining virtue when deciding.

Alef Bais

Wed, Jan 04 2012, 6:08 pm

kitov wrote:

Alef Bais wrote:

Seriously, amother above, why do you have to be anonymous for that post???

A) No, I DO NOT know that she has a 12-year-old. Anyone can answer theoretically at what age they would let their child do something. A kid can be 3 or 5 or 10 and a mother can still have an opinion that does not reveal her actual child's age at this time. C'mon!

B)Also, I don't necessarily know that she lives in NY and besides, what's the big deal if she does, a zillion people live there, it's not like that will identify her.

C) Gosh, that sounds paranoid to me.

amother

Wed, Jan 04 2012, 6:09 pm

Alef Bais wrote:

Seriously, amother above, why do you have to be anonymous for that post???

Sorry I wasn't sure if I should be anon. I can PM you if you'd like. I just wasn't in the mood of flack tonight.

After some stories here in NY I did some research and found out that the NYC/NYS? recommended age for walking home alone from a bus stop is 12.

From what I hear ages 8-11 are most vulnerable. And younger than that seems to be too young for the city.

amother

Wed, Jan 04 2012, 6:24 pm

Alef Bais wrote:

Amother, oh! It makes sense that this age is what the city recommends. They have to cover themselves in case anything happens.

I have an safety booklet from a jewish saftely organization that was sent out after the story here this summer which was also published in Hamodia that backs up this info. I can point it out to you if you'd like.

Marion

Wed, Jan 04 2012, 10:59 pm

What is a varsity bus??? Do you mean a CITY bus? As in public transportation?

My 5 year travels by hasa'a (and has for several years now); it doesn't stop in front of the door, rather out the complex and around the corner (out of sight, but only about 250m from the front door). I allow him to be dropped off on Friday when I'm not there to meet him; he knows to come straight home, and there is someone in the house so he can go right inside. (I have a time conflict with all the pickups/dropoffs.)

tovasara

Thu, Jan 05 2012, 5:55 am

Alef Bais wrote:

kitov wrote:

Is the child the only one getting off at that stop? Is it usually a busy street or a deserted one?

Yes. It's a rather busy street, it's an avenue, there is a shul across the road where men are going for mincha usually around that time.

Our bus stop is similar. You would think that having a shul right there would be a good thing. But remember it would be easy for a molester to be looking like he's going to shul and instead make friends with your child. Just yesterday a really creepy looking guy was sitting in his car first staring at me, then expressing interest in the boys who got off one of the buses. Chances are it was nothing, but why take a chance?

I would feel differently if a child was getting off the bus with others and they all look out for each other.

Alef Bais

Thu, Jan 05 2012, 10:23 am

Marion wrote:

What is a varsity bus??? Do you mean a CITY bus? As in public transportation?

It's a yellow school bus that is paid for by the city. Therefore it only stops at designated street corners and not in front of your house.

gold21

Thu, Jan 05 2012, 11:14 am

my oldest is 5 and a half, but in my mind age 12-13 is a good age to start this type of thing. (I have siblings in the 12-13 age range so I am familiar with kids this age)