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School Rant

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Mitzvahmom

Wed, Nov 01 2006, 10:50 am

School update...

I am mad!!!

I went into the meeting, and they are all like... oh we love your daughter, and we only want her to succeed at school... blah blah blah.. But we do not think she is succeeding here, etc etc.

When I tried to voice my opinion that I want her to have a jewish education that it is very important to me. The social worker, started in on me.

"I hear you saying me me me me, what about your daughter? Are you really thinking about her best interests?"

OH I got mad, and said excuse me this is my daughter and I think I know what is best for her

"Yes but ino ur defense we are the ones that deal with her at school all day, not you."

I then told them, that I was very upset that they would accuse me of not putting her first, that my children have always been number one to me. They tried to interupt and I got louder and said let me finish what I am saying.

Basically told them that right now, I am deep into my class at the college and I am unable to just drop it and focus on her. G-d willing it will finish in a month and a half and then I can really BE to help with any transition if there will be a transition.

Now I am stuck, because they said they will give her 6 more weeks (basically till the end of the my semester) blah!

B"H I found a group that might beable to work with her at the private school, and I am talking to her on the phone today G-d willing.

And I found another group that might beable to help me get her into a specialized school for a year just to work out her emotional issues. If the group I mentioned above does not make a difference at the Jewish school.

Basically, I am ina rock and a hard place.

Wed, Nov 01 2006, 11:50 am

I hope things improve for you soon

Last edited by ep on Wed, Apr 23 2008, 9:26 am; edited 1 time in total

Mitzvahmom

Wed, Nov 01 2006, 6:30 pm

I am one of the parents that said the Natural parenting works!!

Problem isthe School gives her inappropriate snacks and will not let me bring her things that are appropriate! It's very upsetting! They knwo if she has anythign witha dye or sugar that it sends her intoa r age... But it's like they want her out so they do it on purpose (g-d forbid t hey should do such a thing) but let's be honest it happens!

Wed, Nov 01 2006, 9:30 pm

Mitzvahmom, I really admire you. It seems like you handled the meeting really well. You need to continue to do what's best for your child.

leomom

Wed, Nov 01 2006, 11:17 pm

If the Feingold diet works for your daughter & helps her behavior, perhaps you could get a friendly doctor to write you a note requiring that the school only give her foods approved by you? Especially if you are willing to provide her snacks, etc., I don't see what the big deal would be. Perhaps on a trial basis (I.e., for the next six weeks)?

How old is your daughter?

Also, do you work regular hours or flexible hours? Because I know people who work full-time and homeschool children too. It requires creativity but it can be done. Learning doesn't have to happen only during "school hours." Surprised

So don't feel that you have no other options. Just an idea to tuck away in case it helps later, even temporarily at some point.

raizy

Wed, Nov 01 2006, 11:34 pm

I really feel for u. I hope it all works out.

but it sometimes it all boils down bc the teacher is young and unexperienced and cant handle the class so she finds a ginny pig. and the ginny in this case is your dd.

its happening to my dd. whenever there is an sub she goes beserk. she makes trouble etc. problem is everyone copies her. she is the ringleader. if she tells the class to misbehave they will all copy her. what am I suppose to do. Question

Mitzvahmom

Thu, Nov 02 2006, 7:44 am

Her hebrew teacher called me this morning, and is doing a "scientific" study.. Because my daughter listens to her but n ot her english teacher.

G-d willing she can help, and we will see. I am not putting too much hope in it though

mom3boys

Thu, Nov 02 2006, 8:54 am

I am just curious, what kind of a school is it? From the sound of it, they have involved a social worker who wouldn't have a clue of how imporant a Jewish education is. Be strong, you are the only one who really has best interests of your child in mind.

Mitzvahmom

Thu, Nov 02 2006, 9:19 am

The social worker is Jewish, and she is the social worker for the school.

It's a Yeshivish School, and they have a huge history of not accomidating children with "special" needs. Basically any child that is unwilling to sit and fit into their idea of a child ready to learn.

gryp

Thu, Nov 02 2006, 9:32 am

Quote:

its happening to my dd. whenever there is an sub she goes beserk. she makes trouble etc. problem is everyone copies her. she is the ringleader. if she tells the class to misbehave they will all copy her. what am I suppose to do.

I could think of plenty of things I would do to my daughter if she misbehaved when there is a sub and got the whole class to copy her.

amother

Thu, Nov 02 2006, 9:55 am

(I am the teacher who responded to you in another thread...)

What are you doing to make sure your daughter's special needs are met?

From your posts, it is obvious that she does have special needs. There are simple modifications that the teacher can use that don't take up a lot of time, and she should be doing those. (I don't know if the problems are more academic or behavioral, so it's hard to give suggestions...) Perhaps you need to help her figure out what they are. If the class is not set up as a special education class, the teacher is still obligated to try some simple modifications, just remember that they don't always work, and sometimes it's just not enough. Also if a student becomes disruptive to the rest of the class (more than any other student) it is unfair to allow her to stay in the room. I do think that whatever strategies you do use, you as the parent need to be very involved. If your daughter knows that you and her teacher are working together to help her, she will understand that she needs to put in effort- and she needs to know what will happen if she does't cooperate. Of course this will only work if she is capable of doing what you and the teacher demand (and you need to remember to be realistic). If she is not capable of it, then it really is unfair and unrealistic to keep her in the same setting.

Mitzvahmom

Thu, Nov 02 2006, 10:00 am

Here's the thing.. the English teacher just is unable to deal with those little changes, in co-operation. It makes things very difficult, I had my daughter's therapist supervise her in english and hebrew.

Therapist said as follows:
The english teacher is just not acknowledging your daughter at all. Even if she does one thing in the slightest (trying something hard) the teacher just ignores her basically. But the teacher acknowledges all the other kids!

Whereas the Hebrew teacher is constantly acknowledging every child in the class and consistantly tells her good job and gives her stickers.

amother

Fri, Nov 03 2006, 3:16 pm

Send a bag of stickers, cheap prizes, adn a chart to school, with a note to the teacher to give stickers and prizes to your daughter when she behaves. Maybe the stickers can be for a chart, and can be given daily- lets say up to five stickers, and then a prize when twenty stickers are earned. Or any variation on that.

I what your daughter needs is some rewards, and the teacher can to this in about thirty seconds at the end of each day maybe the situation will greatly improve. It's hard to imagine the teacher would flat out refuse.

(disclaimer- maybe there really are some bigger issues that won't be solved by this? Soemtimes it really isn't so simple...)

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