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Forum
-> Parenting our children
amother
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Wed, Mar 29 2006, 6:25 pm
I had rough day today and was feeling emotionally drained by the time my kids got home from school. My oldest could tell I was upset (they arrived home about 10 min. earlier than expected...before I had a chance to wash my face and get a glass of water) Anyway, my beautiful 8 year old daughter made dinner for her siblings and then offered to make me a salad when they were done b/c she said I looked sad and wanted to cheer me up. Is it bad that they saw me upset? (Not the angry kind of upset, just emotional!)
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hisorerus
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Wed, Mar 29 2006, 6:33 pm
I think it's fine! Your kids should know you're human. That was so sweet of your daughter to offer to help, it shows you're doing something right (she both noticed and tried to help when she saw someone else upset).
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shoy18
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Wed, Mar 29 2006, 6:35 pm
Thier is nothing wrong with your children seing a little upset. What a wonderful daughter you raised, so sweet and sensitive, you should be proud!
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goldrose
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Wed, Mar 29 2006, 6:56 pm
Not only is it okay, but it's a good thing. It's important, however, that you let them know either why you are upset or - if it's not their business - just let them know that you are upset for reasons unrelated to them, and they didnt cause your upsetness.
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happymom
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Wed, Mar 29 2006, 8:27 pm
its good. now they know that u are human too as long as u didnt yell at them, which sounds to me like u didnt! its fine.... wow, what a nice daughter u have!
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hardwrknmom
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Wed, Mar 29 2006, 9:18 pm
I dont think there's a law on this however, it happens sometimes..just hug and kiss your kids..they'll know you're always there for them even when your upset, in essence you'll find comfort in that
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Motek
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Fri, Mar 31 2006, 2:11 pm
Tefila wrote: | e.g. I said to my husband the other day do you have cash b/c I have none to shop.
to which my dd answered don't worry mummy I have cash in my tzedakah box for people who have none |
good advice in your post tefila!
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happyone
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Fri, Mar 31 2006, 3:06 pm
original poster; you sound like your children are really sensitive, if your 8 year old offered to make you salad. You obviously are doing something right!
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Ruchel
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Sat, Apr 29 2006, 7:13 pm
I would say it is ok to let the children see, but not too often or too upset because it could traumatize them.
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Tefila
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Thu, Dec 14 2006, 2:43 am
Quote: | but not too often or too upset because it could traumatize them. |
Or done often enough desensitize them like not again
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happymom
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Thu, Dec 14 2006, 9:20 am
I was feeling down the other day... my 22 month old daughter came up to me and said "mommy can I give you hug and a kiss?" then she braught me all her toys and asked "are u feel better?" lol It was sooooo cute!
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chocolate moose
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Thu, Dec 14 2006, 10:05 am
if you feel that way, let us ALL give you hugs!
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greenfire
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Thu, Dec 14 2006, 10:52 am
kids need to know we're human, explain why you were upset, so she knows that we all deal with situations we don't like. How sweet it is that she helped take care of dinner. (sometimes moms have to be superhuman though)
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Esther01
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Thu, Dec 14 2006, 11:10 am
you can also explain to them how you feel and why, ex. 'mommy is very sad today because xyz' , this will teach them to express themselves when they are in a similar situation...
you can also say something that will help you feel better ex. 'if I relax here a bit while you all go do your homework... I'll feel better' ,or 'let's have a family hug so that I feel better' , this way you teach them to come up with solutions of how to feel better when they are in the same situation.
Hatzlacha and feel better!!
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su7kids
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Thu, Dec 14 2006, 1:43 pm
I think its ok for kids to see you have emotions, but the most important thing, is to make sure that your children don't think THEY are responsible for your upset-ness. Let them nkow that you appreciate them trying to cheer you up, and it does help, but that its up to each one of us to cheer ourselves up and its not THEIR FAULT that you're upset.
Kids tend to take tremendous responsibility for their parents' moods.
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slush
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Thu, Dec 14 2006, 2:10 pm
You should have loads more nachas from your kids!!
be proud of yourself - you're obviously doing some thing right and that in itself should cheer you up!!
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supermom
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Thu, Dec 14 2006, 2:39 pm
When I was sitting shiva my daughter (four at that time) would come up to me constantly and give me hugs and kisses. She use to tell me it is okay to cry for ziedy but zeidy is happy. And then she would run to get me a roll of tissues and a bag.
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