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Forum -> Judaism -> Halachic Questions and Discussions
Visiting cemetery after 7 years



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brooklyn




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 7:34 am
My father died almost two years ago and was buried in Israel. I was not able to go for the burial and have not been to the grave as of yet. I do not know when I will be able to go. (Financially) I heard that if you do not visit a grave within seven years you are never able to go again. I think this sounds crazy. Is there any halachik basis to this or is this some silly wives tale?
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happyone




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 10:24 am
I don't think that makes sense.......
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MyKidsRQte




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 10:26 am
My father went to Hungary to his father's keiver two years ago, saying that if he didn't go that year, he wouldn't be able to go as it was 7 years since he last went.

I am not sure, but I think it applies only to a parent's keiver
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su7kids




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 11:40 am
Wow, I never heard of that. I wonder if I'll ever get to my mother's Kever. She's in South Africa and at this point, I have no intention of going back there.
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amother


 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 12:25 pm
I did hear about it. My grandmother recently passed away and was buried in Isreal my father couldn't go.

As per my knowledge it is an halacha. When it comes to parents it is part of the mitzvah of KIBID AV. What they also told my father was that IF he doesn't visit the kever for seven years or more he has to send someone to appologize on his behalf before he goes to visit the kever.
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queen




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 12:27 pm
why don't you just ask your rav.........?
however I never heard of that... (but will ask as I'm intrigued!)
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Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 12:37 pm
I never heard of that. In my family I've heard of people going much after 7 years...
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ltlesmartmom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 12:40 pm
amother wrote:
I did hear about it. My grandmother recently passed away and was buried in Isreal my father couldn't go.

As per my knowledge it is an halacha. When it comes to parents it is part of the mitzvah of KIBID AV. What they also told my father was that IF he doesn't visit the kever for seven years or more he has to send someone to appologize on his behalf before he goes to visit the kever.


I heard the same. I think you should ask a rav or dayin.
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su7kids




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 1:00 pm
Ok, sending someone to apologize makes sense. At least you're not totally forbidden from going.

Obviously, when there are many miles and continents separating us, its not always easy to go.
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BeershevaBubby




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 1:30 pm
Why is a child then absolved of the lack of Kibud Av v'Em by sending a Shaliach to apologize, or effectively ask Mechilah, when a person who has wronged someone else who then dies before Mechilah can be asked is stuck?
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shalhevet




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 24 2006, 1:37 pm
Kmelion wrote:
Why is a child then absolved of the lack of Kibud Av v'Em by sending a Shaliach to apologize, or effectively ask Mechilah, when a person who has wronged someone else who then dies before Mechilah can be asked is stuck?


He is not stuck.
He can bring a minyan to the kever and ask for mechila like that.
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