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New job vs old job



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amother


 

Post Thu, Aug 14 2014, 8:17 pm
So after all the theoretical shmoozing on the other thread happening now as well as similar ones we've had in the past, I finally have an actual offer that would enable me to get off of medicaid and food stamps while still working only part time (long story but for many reasons including health issues, a full time with salary and benefits job is just too much for me to take on right now) However, it is about 50% more hours than I currently work, plus it comes with a significantly longer commute (and moving closer is not an option, too expensive) so I would be out of the house more than twice as much time as currently. Most of it would be while my kids are in school but one is only 2 so I'd have to send her away from me for more time a lot sooner than I did for my others, either to babysitter or nursery. As it is, even with much fewer hours at work, I am not exactly bored nor exactly managing my home/kids/responsibilities all that great, I rarely have time for myself. So working twice as long is a bit daunting, though the raise in salary seems nice and promising (it is more per hour besides being more hours; the more hours are necessary because otherwise the raise per hour would be enough to get me disqualified from govt help without being enough to pay for food and health out of pocket)

But the bottom line is I'd be working a little more than TWICE as long, to just about break even but live independently instead of on government programs. This is with no raise in quality of life, just to live on the SAME budget as I currently do. It's hard to calculate the numbers exactly but I'd end up with MAYBE $200 more per month, which would probably go straight to cleaning help to make up for the fact that I'd be home 15 hours per week less than before.

I don't know what to do Sad

DH is in favor of me taking the job because there were certain things I disliked about my current work environment, but then again there are other things that I do like about it and I also am not sure he understands what a huge undertaking it would be for me to double my time away from home. I was indeed looking for a change but I'm not sure this is it because it is really the exact same job just an hour away and better pay. What I really wished for was a different TYPE of job, which so far I haven't gotten.

So I still don't know what to do Sad

I wish we still had prophets. I don't have a Rebbe either, which is anyway not the same thing though for some people could function similar...
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amother


 

Post Thu, Aug 14 2014, 9:03 pm
Maybe I'm not understanding- u will work twice as long, and have the same money/quality of life? Why do it??? By the way, ur not alone. There r thousands of frum people that don't bother to look for a better job (or a job at all!) because it will interfere with their free programs. I'm not understanding the other side of this argument. This is the world we live in.
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amother


 

Post Thu, Aug 14 2014, 9:32 pm
amother wrote:
Maybe I'm not understanding- u will work twice as long, and have the same money/quality of life? Why do it??? By the way, ur not alone. There r thousands of frum people that don't bother to look for a better job (or a job at all!) because it will interfere with their free programs. I'm not understanding the other side of this argument. This is the world we live in.


Why do it:
- No more hassle of proving that you qualify for programs, and playing games where every time someone asks you to do a small job and you really could use the money but first you have to do the math and figure out if it will put you over the cutoff... Plus, able to take odd jobs and earn more money for little pleasures in life like cleaning help which I currently am not sure if I can do without going over cutoffs.
- No more feeling embarrassed every time you take out your food stamp card in the supermarket, or making the entire world stop and wait and stare because they changed the WIC guidelines AGAIN and now you're stuck at checkout figuring things out...
- Possibility for more hours at better pay if I do decide I want them in the future. If I don't take this job now I am positive they will never call me back again, and this is the best paying company I have ever seen in my field...
- Possibility that a health insurance I pay for myself might have better choices of doctors. Not sure about this, will need some investigation.
- Possibility that I will like the new place of work better, I had various kinds of stress at my old job. Unsure whether or not this will be the case, like I said it is essentially the same job just in a different place with different people.
- forgot to mention the schedule is slightly better; even though there are more hours they are all hours when my oldest is in school whereas my current job I work fewer hours but get home later due to the schedule at the different place. I really was looking for a shift in hours even if it required a few more hours, but I was not really looking for so many hours just to break even.

Basically I just feel stupid turning down a job that pays significantly better and offers a change of environment, but it's hard to tell whether or not I would actually gain anything from all the extra work. I am not even entirely sure whether in the end I'd break even or come out behind or ahead - it is so hard to tell because of all the variables that need to be figured out.

There's also the part about sustenance coming from Hashem... I am thinking in that light I should not push myself to work so hard for so many hours away from home, but DH is citing the "story" of the man in a flood praying for salvation but turning down the rescue boats because God will save him, DH says this is our rescue boat. I am not so sure, I still think maybe our rescue boat is to keep living tight for another couple of years until DH finishes school and gets a better job, let HIM drive the boat! But it is very difficult.
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MaBelleVie




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 14 2014, 9:39 pm
Will this be a good move professionally?
How do you think the additional work hours will affect you, practically speaking?

Also consider that if either you or dh has an opportunity to supplement the income you will have the freedom to do so. I imagine that you're trying to move up financially, and that won't happen by keeping yourselves under the cutoffs (obviously).
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amother


 

Post Thu, Aug 14 2014, 9:52 pm
Professionally the job is at exactly the same level as what I have been doing before, but with better pay because it's with a better company, which means also if I did well with the additional hours and want more at some point, they might give me. Or maybe I might make connections that could serve me well in the future. The place where I am now is nice and friendly but not very connected. Still, I am not necessarily looking for that kind of advancement, I'm hoping maybe by the time my baby is in school maybe we'll be ready for another one anyway and not look for more hours... whatever.

The additional work hours will be hard. It is double what I'm used to. I will need to send my baby away which she will probably love because she is very social and loves to follow her big sister to kindergarten but I'm not sure I would have been ready otherwise. On the other hand, the move to earlier in the day will be good. But I'll have to get up and out much earlier, and go to sleep earlier to facilitate that, so need to figure out how to get everything done in less evening time without even being able to do any housework in the morning as I currently do. Basically it would be a big change!

But yes the freedom to supplement income is a big issue. Right now we're stuck, we do everything aboveboard so anything extra we want we can't afford because if we could afford it, we wouldn't qualify for assistance and we wouldn't afford ANYTHING. The issue is whether to take the leap now by me working double, or to sit tight (very tight) for another 2-3 years until DH earns the professional credential he is working towards and then we can do it together much more comfortably (less work for me because he would be doing much more, plus with both of us earning we would be able to more than break even without the worry about going under) I never wanted to be working so much, my plan was always to work part time and handle the home and kids better, I'm not talented enough to deal with it all. But we had a sort of career crisis and DH is back in school so it's not happening exactly that way. Long story but now we basically have about 3 years ahead of us in which DH has neither an income nor the spare time to help out at home while I raise the income. It sort of stinks. So I'm not sure if by wanting to work less during this time, am I being lazy or am I sticking to my ideals? My ideals never included food stamps but they also didn't include running around from 8 AM while outsourcing my childcare and fitting housework and self-care and whatever else into less time and no more money.
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amother


 

Post Thu, Aug 14 2014, 10:03 pm
Basically I'm afraid to take this on, but I'm also afraid that that would be like sending away the boat. You know, in the flood story. Maybe this is G-d opening a door out of our tight spot now. It's about as good as I could have hoped for at this point, I think... a couple of other attempts with better timing/location didn't pan out, I had a couple of offers with better location but the pay was less so it wouldn't really have helped because I would have had to work more hours anyway to break even. What I REALLY hoped for was for the rescue boat to come in the form of a bigger apartment without higher rent so we could live a little better without rocking the financial boat. This offer doesn't really help that department at all. It would also be nice for someone to come to DH and offer him a generous fellowship opportunity to continue his studies while covering his living expenses, but that's extremely unlikely, he hasn't even finished his BS yet. Lottery winnings would work, we usually buy each other a couple of tickets for birthday/anniversary presents, though we haven't won a single dollar back yet. So it does look like this might just be the boat.
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MaBelleVie




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Aug 14 2014, 10:12 pm
I guess it's up to you to consider whether or not those additional hours will strain you to the extent that you regret taking them on. Also, will you find the commute relaxing or stressful? That can be a big issue.
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amother


 

Post Fri, Aug 15 2014, 8:36 am
Regarding government programs.
#1 If your income goes up somewhat and you're no longer eligible for Medicaid/NJ Family Care, you should be able to get health insurance thru the marketplace, subsidized by the government, unless your income is really high, which I doubt.
#2 Your employer can probably pay towards child care and commuting expenses directly, which will then not increase your income so much, and also not increase the taxes you pay so much. This an accountant would know how much they're allowed to give, etc.

I'm at a similar point where I've lost food stamps, and soon will loose NJ Family Care for myself and my husband, but my income has not gone up, just children got older, daughter who finished seminary is working, and food stamps was cut back. I've lost $480 of food stamps - working to retrain to increase income but it's a long road ahead. So be so thankful so you can do this (get off of programs) - from someone who can't.
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self-actualization




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Aug 15 2014, 8:58 am
amother wrote:

I'm at a similar point where I've lost food stamps, and soon will loose NJ Family Care for myself and my husband, but my income has not gone up, just children got older, daughter who finished seminary is working, and food stamps was cut back. I've lost $480 of food stamps - working to retrain to increase income but it's a long road ahead. So be so thankful so you can do this (get off of programs) - from someone who can't.


This is a very good point. Similar things happened to my friends. And it's not only in the world of benefits, a number of them "worked in the school to get tuition breaks" and then when their kids left school they didn't get cash payments from the school so they had to leave (or were asked to leave). I feel like it's best to bite the bullet and go the legitimate working route because over time you will build up skills, your salary will keep pace with inflation, you can eventually work full time even if it's in many years from now, and you won't get stuck relying on government programs that can go away.

A number of my friends made similar arguments about govt programs or other cashless benefits. At the end of the day they kept income low to qualify for the benefits or to have a better "lifestyle" but when they were missing cash in their lives it hurt. Life is not only your apt and your kids' school (and food), you also might want to do other things and without a potential stream of income you can't. I am a strong proponent of working as hard as you possibly can, even if there is a commute.
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amother


 

Post Fri, Aug 15 2014, 9:01 am
OP here want to clarify this is a short term (3 year) situation because DH is in school progressing nicely towards a very promising career that is in high demand with a good salary. So in any case in around 3 years we will be well positioned to drop all government programs and choose our own ratio of hours worked and standard of living. The question now is whether to work really hard to make the leap before then, or sit tight for the next few years continuing to qualify for help. We won't be stuck in the long term IY"H.
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amother


 

Post Fri, Aug 15 2014, 9:04 am
Regarding subsidized health marketplace insurance thing, is there any way to find out what the costs would be without actually doing the application? When I go on the exchange/marketplace/whatever website it gives zero info until you enter everything, and I'm not going to go and enter info into my account under my ID for a possible future job I don't have yet! I just want to know what I could get IF that happens! So annoying.
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Aug 15 2014, 10:28 am
I obviously can't really tell you what to do especially since I don't know you, but since you asked for advice, I will give it to you. I think you should take the job. It seems like a good opportunity and there is growth potential. I hope that after your husband finishes school he gets a dream job, but it's possible that won't happen so quickly and you shouldn't wait for him to save the day. It will be hard to work longer hours, but hopefully, you will rise to the challenge.

About two years ago I was offered a job with a higher salary ($10K more than I was making in my previous job) but instead of working 30-35 hours a week this would be 40-50 hours a week. I didn't know how I would do it, but I decided to take the job. Honestly, my quality of life got better because I hired cleaning help and decided to eat dinner out one night a week. I make dinner on Sundays for Sunday and Monday, eat out Tuesday, make quick salmon and potatoes on Wednesday and cook for shabbat all on Thursday night. I have cleaning help on Friday so I come hope to a very clean and neat house. That really made a difference for me. I honestly prefer to work longer and have cleaning help then to do all the cleaning myself. After my first year, I got a raise, and was able to negotiate to leave 30 minutes earlier each day. I am making a lot more than I was in my previous job (even with the cleaning help and restaurant expenses deducted).

Go for this job. It's a great opportunity and I think you will feel good about yourself for taking it.
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Lady Bug




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Aug 15 2014, 11:06 am
Something to consider: you say the new job is a one time offer that you wouldn't get again. If you take the job now, will you have the option to cut your hours later on while keeping the higher rate per hour? Then, you can cut your hours when you decide to have another baby (and DH will probably be earning nicely by then).
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amother


 

Post Fri, Aug 15 2014, 12:32 pm
Whether I could raise/lower the hours depends on what cases are available, it's a service profession so yes there is a chance I could get more/less hours if I wanted. But the commute would be about the same because it is a neighborhood-specific agency. So if I did less, it would be nearly an hour of travel each way for fewer hours of work...

My current job is very dead-end but being a 5-minute walk from home and my children's schools is a pretty nice perk, especially when you have a nursing baby.
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