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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Teenagers and Older children
Midnight Sessions!!



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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 25 2007, 8:04 am
They keep waking me up - I have to start giving midnight and middle of the night therapy sessions just to keep em sane ... and everything I say is never good enough or only last in the moment ... and forgotten later ... so I have to start again ... I do not want to be the therapist on call ... they drain me ... and I am trying to catch up with my life and pesach ...
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mirisimma




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 25 2007, 8:13 am
oy, hang in there. if theyre coming to you, then apperently you are making a difference. youre lucky your kids come to you to talk, you must be special mommy Smile
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 25 2007, 8:26 am
they're actually not coming to me but I hear crying in middle of night so.... how can I not get up and work through issues ... I only wish it would help ... and that she didn't always look at negative ... attitude make the difference but then she says things that hurt me ... like I didn't do enough as mother ... (which by the way I do plenty) and I have to remain super human and calm and inside I worry if I say the wrong thing ....
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mirisimma




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 25 2007, 9:05 am
"I only wish it would help"

it does. you never know when someone thinks about what you're saying. it can be on the spot, and they dont show it, or few days later. just being there and getting up fr them makes a huge difference, youre telling them you care and theyre important... and you're showing them you feel that way and that Hashem Feels that way. I dont know why girls and mommies cant get along till they're older... but it seems to not be uncommon. stay strong, and stay loving Smile
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Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 25 2007, 1:04 pm
I feel all ashamed... I used to go to my mom for midnight sessions too... how high school or uni was annoying, how I was afraid for the linguistics test, how I was "becoming an old maid" Rolling Eyes, how I would never get married before Pessach so I would have to wait "forever" lol
She must be happy I'm married now Twisted Evil be strong, one day your daughter will have a dh to talk to and you'll be able to sleep more! Very Happy

Oh, and it's not that what you say is not good or forgotten after, it's that the anxiety makes them want to hear it again and again. It helps them convincing themselves. It's not about what you say, it's about how they feel.
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Ima'la




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 25 2007, 2:14 pm
I remember a seminary girl telling me how several months earlier she had stayed up late baking challah, and she accidentally burned herself badly and she was in so much pain that she woke up her mother and her mother stayed up with her all night making her cold compresses until they could go to the doc. in the morning...and I, with my not-yet-sleeping-through-the-night first baby just thought to myself: She was 18 years old and her mother was STILL up all night with her!!!!!!!

Green, they'll appreciate you more once they're out of their teens. Don't you remember what Bill Cosby said?

I suspect it's not so much *what* you say that makes a difference, but the love you show them by dragging your weary self out of bed to sit and talk and comfort - so keep saying it even if it's the millionth time. You're a great mom!
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mirisimma




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 25 2007, 6:28 pm
I agree. keep loving them and they'll feel it Smile
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bashinda




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 25 2007, 7:07 pm
and I agree. you sound like an amazing mom. IY"H your kids will figure that out some day.
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