Rabbi Moshe Meir Weiss' view

Motek

Fri, Apr 06 2007, 5:02 pm

R' M.M. Weiss, a rav and teacher in a girls' B.Y. high schools, wrote an article in the year 2000 discussing why he thinks the last fifteen years have seen an unprecedented crisis among frum youth.

When he started teaching in 1985, he said that 80% of the mothers of the girls he taught were full-time homemakers. Today he says, it's the other way around, with 80% of mothers working full time.

He understands that some have no choice, that was always the case. Whether for valid reasons or not (that was not the issue here), he was observing that parents, particularly mothers, are not available for their children as they used to be, not physically available (like not being home when their children come home from school, or even when home, not having time for their children), and not emotionally available because of having to juggle so many responsibilities. He offered some suggestions etc. but I don't have the article anymore.

shanie5

Sat, Apr 07 2007, 9:25 pm

exactly. these b.y. schools he teaches in tell girls to marry learning boys and support them. then complain that these same girls have no time/energy for their children (and cant afford their tuitions either).

healthymama

Sat, Apr 07 2007, 11:19 pm

I really doubt that the crises among the off the derech crowd can be simplified as easily as blaming it on the working moms.

Plenty of other times in society saw similar problems in the frum communities and moms stayed home ( pre-BY times for example). In addition, most off the derech situations take place when the child is a teenager and is in school most of the day. I think it is highly unrealistic to expect the mother to sit at home with milk and cookies waiting for their 15 year old to come home from yeshiva.

Many of these teenagers are sent away to yeshivos "out of town" so I'm not sure how their mothers are expected to be there after school.

Motek

Sun, Apr 08 2007, 11:19 am

healthymama wrote:

Plenty of other times in society saw similar problems in the frum communities and moms stayed home ( pre-BY times for example).

no comparison IMO
back then, the extreme poverty made the teenagers ripe for the picking by the socialists, bundists, zionists, communists
the kids were IDEALISTIC though misdirected

today's kids are apathetic or angry and either doing nothing (hanging out, partying, doing drugs, sleeping around) or working

Quote:

In addition, most off the derech situations take place when the child is a teenager and is in school most of the day.

One day, the teen drops out? Nope. The problems start waaaaay earlier than teendom as CM has noted herself.

Quote:

I think it is highly unrealistic to expect the mother to sit at home with milk and cookies waiting for their 15 year old to come home from yeshiva.

Nobody has made that silly suggestion. If a mother has school-aged children, and I don't mean toddlers, nobody says she must be home while they are in school.

By the way, Mrs./Rebbetzin Weiss was not a working mother but stayed home and raised her 6 children.