How kids spend their own money

amother

Bisque

Tue, Jun 28 2016, 1:40 am

Do you control, or advise or ever veto what your kids want to buy with their own money?

I recently got my DD new shoes for the summer - she specifically didn't want sandals, but canvas summery shoes. She also has an additional pair of shoes, her older sister's former Shabbat shoes. And she has shabbat shoes. Plenty of shoes for a 10 year old I think!

Now she decided she wants sandals. She has 100 shekels from a gift that a relative gave her a few months ago.
She wants to buy sandals with that money.
I'm wondering if I should just let her spend it - she says she doesn't have anything else to buy with this money, and she wants sandals.
I feel like just allowing it, is allowing her to throw her money away, and not think things through properly. When we bought the new summer shoes originally, she should have thought carefully what she wants.
On the other hand, why not let her buy something she wants with her money.

Any opinions?

RachelEve14

Tue, Jun 28 2016, 2:01 am

I'm a big fan of letting them to use 100 NIS so later they don't waste 1000. We have all made impulse purchases we later regret. Maybe tell her before making a decision because it's a lot of money she should think about it 1 week. If she still wants to buy sandals after a week, I'd let her with no judgement.

amother

Purple

Tue, Jun 28 2016, 6:10 am

I think you should let her, though remind her that once that money is spent, she can't get it back, so she should think twice about it. But if it's a mistake, that's OK, it'll be a learning experience. In general, kids should be allowed to make spending decisions with their own money. It's how they learn. The exception is when the item is something you don't want to buy for non-monetary reasons. For example, if you don't want your kids to have tablets, then you can forbid the purchase of one even if it's with their own money.

greenfire

Tue, Jun 28 2016, 10:45 am

generally it is important to guide a child on how to save/spend monies appropriately

shoes however are quite practical ... I would think a 10 year old would want something more FUN

& despite have her new canvas shoes - having sandals is imho a need for the summer that perhaps should fall under a parents' purchase

amother

Seafoam

Tue, Jun 28 2016, 11:23 am

amother wrote:

This exactly!

tichellady

Tue, Jun 28 2016, 12:06 pm

greenfire wrote:

Agree with this. I don't think having sandals, Shabbos shoes, and canvas shoes is excessive at all. Don't see how this is a waste of money - if shoes are important to her than having a few choices makes sense

amother

Bisque

Wed, Jun 29 2016, 2:18 am

tichellady wrote:

OP here. Thanks for your comments. Although I didn't really ask for comments as to whether sandals are a necessity. It could have been any item. I think that for kids who are growing out of their shoes every 6-9 months anyway, and therefore need new ones regularly, don't need that large a choice of shoes.
And if it makes a difference, she wears socks anyway, even with sandals, so it's not like sandals are that much cooler for the summer. So 2 pairs of weekday shoes (the canvas ones, and the older sister's ones, which she also wears often) and 1 pair of Shabbat shoes (and crocs!), in my mind, is plenty. That's why I consider it a potentially unnecessary cost.
But as I said, the point wasn't that it was shoes.

Thanks for all your opinions and help anyway Smile

She bought the sandals.