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Feel like I bought the wrong house



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amother
Green


 

Post Thu, Jan 26 2017, 5:26 pm
We moved to a new house about a year ago. For various reasons we had to move quickly and renting wasn't an option. We were moving from NYC to a much lower cost of living area and everything seemed wonderful compared to what we were used to.

Now that we're here though I cant help feeling we made a mistake.

For one, the area is growing but in the opposite direction. We bought on the wrong side of town.

The other side of town has more spacious homes and wider lawns. Again coming from NY even the small yard we have seemed luxurious but now I wish I had a bigger one.

Also we've already invested money into the house to modify some problems with the layout (like a bathroom on the first floor). If we stay longer there are more modifications we need to make. Also it's a buyer's market here, we would not be able to sell the house for what we paid.

We did pay very little for the house and it is very spacious BH. To even complain makes me feel like a spoiled brat. I'm just looking for some change in perspective here.
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amother
Bronze


 

Post Thu, Jan 26 2017, 5:36 pm
Eizer hi ashir , hasomeach bchelko.

Marbeh nechasim, marbeh dargah.
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 26 2017, 5:36 pm
well now that you own it make it yours with rehab & decorating ...

eventually you can sell it but not before seriously thinking about where you want to live & what you are looking for in a house

once that happens you might consider using it as rental income
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amother
Scarlet


 

Post Thu, Jan 26 2017, 5:38 pm
Can you keep the house the way it is, live in it a few years, and then re-evaluate if you should sell or do additional work?

If you know it might be temporary, it may bother you less. (It doesn't seem like a bad place to stay for a few years.)

Many people think that when they purchase a house they will stay in it for long term. However, I've noticed that lots of people do move from one area to another in the same city/town.

Also, you never know, in a few years the community can grow in all directions. I don't know where you are, but sometimes that happens. I live in Monsey, and it was always growing north, until it started really taking off on the south side too.
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amother
Green


 

Post Thu, Jan 26 2017, 5:49 pm
amother wrote:
Can you keep the house the way it is, live in it a few years, and then re-evaluate if you should sell or do additional work?

If you know it might be temporary, it may bother you less. (It doesn't seem like a bad place to stay for a few years.)

Many people think that when they purchase a house they will stay in it for long term. However, I've noticed that lots of people do move from one area to another in the same city/town.

Also, you never know, in a few years the community can grow in all directions. I don't know where you are, but sometimes that happens. I live in Monsey, and it was always growing north, until it started really taking off on the south side too.


This is good advice. The house has its good points. It's not a terrible place to live, especially compared to our previous situation.

I'm just not sure about putting more money into the house.
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doctorima




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 26 2017, 8:14 pm
Could you rent it out and cover your mortgage with the rent, and then rent on the other side of town?
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amother
Green


 

Post Sun, Mar 19 2017, 6:15 pm
This is the OP. Thank you to everyone who responded.

I'm thinking this over. Selling the house isn't feasible at this point, nor is buying a second house and renting out the first one. So we are here for now and making the best of it (which isn't really all that bad if I'm honest).

I realize that my unhappiness with the house stems from comments made by *one* person after we moved in, implying that we made a poor choice. If I could just get that person out of my head... I'm feeling a bit resentful that she wasn't more sensitive and didn't have the brains not to blurt out whatever was on her mind. Until then I was perfectly happy! But it's my own stupid fault for letting her get to me. She's not a bad person, just brainless with a big mouth.
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LittleDucky




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 19 2017, 8:23 pm
amother wrote:
This is the OP. Thank you to everyone who responded.

I'm thinking this over. Selling the house isn't feasible at this point, nor is buying a second house and renting out the first one. So we are here for now and making the best of it (which isn't really all that bad if I'm honest).

I realize that my unhappiness with the house stems from comments made by *one* person after we moved in, implying that we made a poor choice. If I could just get that person out of my head... I'm feeling a bit resentful that she wasn't more sensitive and didn't have the brains not to blurt out whatever was on her mind. Until then I was perfectly happy! But it's my own stupid fault for letting her get to me. She's not a bad person, just brainless with a big mouth.


I think you said the answer to your issue. If she is brainless, perhaps she was wrong with the statement she made? It's hard when you make a big purchase and people point out the negatives- suddenly that's all you see. But once the speaker is labeled clueless, brainless etc- it can make it easier to ignore the words repeating in your head.
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amother
Bronze


 

Post Sun, Mar 19 2017, 8:46 pm
It is also ASSUR after someone has already made a purchase to say something that will make a person feel they made a bad choice. You should instead now make a GOOD choice to not let her aveira cause you to do further a a aveiros by wasting time energy regretting the move.
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sneakermom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Mar 19 2017, 10:01 pm
If someone would have made a negative comment about my house after we bought, I think it would have rattled me.

Making such a big purchase is anxiety provoking And the last thing you need is for someone to trigger those doubts and fears.

Hashem gave you a beautiful home. He sent someone to challenge you about how you feel about it. That's all. You will process your doubts and these feeling god will pass.

Eventually you will come to your own terms about it. Nothing to do with her. In all likelihood you will fall in love with it in a whole new way.
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amother
Green


 

Post Mon, Mar 20 2017, 6:20 am
LittleDucky wrote:
I think you said the answer to your issue. If she is brainless, perhaps she was wrong with the statement she made? It's hard when you make a big purchase and people point out the negatives- suddenly that's all you see. But once the speaker is labeled clueless, brainless etc- it can make it easier to ignore the words repeating in your head.


I think she's clueless socially but she happens to be right that the other side of town has nicer homes with wider lawns etc. I just prioritized differently when choosing the house.
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amother
Pearl


 

Post Mon, Mar 20 2017, 6:30 am
Get that person out of your head.
That said, location is a factor when deciding how much to invest in a house.
Leave aside size of house. Are you happy with the location? With the community? Will your kids have friends and schools there?
Or will you want to move in three yrs?
Those are questions you need to ask before you invest a lot of money making this house a home.
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amother
Mauve


 

Post Wed, Mar 22 2017, 2:19 am
amother wrote:
I think she's clueless socially but she happens to be right that the other side of town has nicer homes with wider lawns etc. I just prioritized differently when choosing the house.

Just as an aside...don't bigger lawns-bigger properties mean larger taxes?
I know by me your tax is calculated on the size of your property
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amother
Aqua


 

Post Wed, Mar 22 2017, 2:57 am
amother wrote:
Just as an aside...don't bigger lawns-bigger properties mean larger taxes?
I know by me your tax is calculated on the size of your property


And those bigger houses could be a lot more expensive than what you paid.

Do you have nice neighbors? Maybe if you had bought a different house, you wouldn't have nice neighbors. Who knows? These things usually work out for the best.
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amother
Azure


 

Post Fri, Mar 31 2017, 9:26 am
If you like your area & you're living comfortably, why look at the other houses? At least you own a house (unlike me and many others who are struggling in a tiny apartment). I noticed that for some people, the more money a person earns, the more that person will spend and there will never be enough money. Just like with houses...now that you own a house, you're looking at even nicer ones, comparing and never be satisfied. Just be happy with what you have.
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