S/O - Say what you mean in your OP

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Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette

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amother

Mistyrose

Tue, Mar 13 2018, 1:30 pm

I'm so tired of OPs posting a very controversial, hypothetical question, getting a ton of heated answers, and then "clarifying" many posts later that it's not actually hypothetical, and indeed there are details that make the situation very different.

Please... if you are going through a difficult situation, don't post a hypothetical with limited details. Post your actual question.

(This has happened more than once in the last week alone.)

purplepear

Tue, Mar 13 2018, 1:35 pm

I agree!

what does s/o mean?

tweety1

Tue, Mar 13 2018, 1:44 pm

Why are you anonymous?!

bigsis144

Tue, Mar 13 2018, 1:48 pm

purplepear wrote:

I agree!

what does s/o mean?

It stands for SpinOff. Ie, this is a post that branches off an aspect of another post, rather that going off topic on the original post

southernbubby

Tue, Mar 13 2018, 2:04 pm

amother wrote:

which post are you referring to?

the wife whose husband wants a divorce due to her weight?

there was also the one where the daughter is marrying out and it is several posts later when we see that she is converting to Islam which is totally different than just marrying out

FranticFrummie

Tue, Mar 13 2018, 2:07 pm

I agree, but I try to be patient with posts like that. I think it comes from a place of fear and deep pain, that they are nervous to be clear up front.

Often the OP comes on first to rant, or test the waters, and only later are they feeling like they can articulate the details in a more accurate way.

That's why I usually answer "You sound very upset. Can you tell me more about what's going on? How can we help you?"

Anything else is just making assumptions, and that's rarely helpful.

amother

Mint

Tue, Mar 13 2018, 2:17 pm

I think when a poster is feeling overwhelmed, it's difficult to be very coherent and offer all the details in one sitting. But then, as other posters come to listen the op is able to offer additional info. Human nature. Makes sense to me. We don't all have well-oiled executive functioning.

amother

Blue

Tue, Mar 13 2018, 3:45 pm

I am the OP of one of those threads.

Speaking only for myself, the purpose of presenting a sanitized original post without my personal details and emotions is to try to get a response that is objective and not just telling me what I want to hear because I am a basket case at the moment.

Sorry that inconveniences some of you.

purplepear

Tue, Mar 13 2018, 4:09 pm

I haven't read any of the above mentioned posts and didn't have anything specific in mind.

I agree with all the reasons given for why someone wouldn't post more detailed information if it's a more emotionally charged or complex subject. It makes sense that the OP doesn't give many details in this case.

I think sometimes it's a more straightforward post and the OP isn't clear on details. That can be frustrating.

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