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How does everyone do it ?
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amother
Sienna


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 4:26 pm
thunderstorm wrote:
I work with a woman in her twenties who needs to have nice sheitels and dresses her kids in expensive clothes. She lives in a tiny apartment and mentioned that she would not be eligible for a mortgage on a new home, since she is a half million dollars in debt with credit cards.
Not all people are living and spending responsibly.


Wow!!
That's sad, it would make me feel so hopeless to be in huge debt that's not house or business related!
As someone who never owned anything expensive, I obviously really can't understand or judge what people who can't afford expensive items will do to get them. Sad
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Bnei Berak 10




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 5:54 pm
thunderstorm wrote:
I work with a woman in her twenties who needs to have nice sheitels and dresses her kids in expensive clothes. She lives in a tiny apartment and mentioned that she would not be eligible for a mortgage on a new home, since she is a half million dollars in debt with credit cards.
Not all people are living and spending responsibly.


In her twenties and half a million USD in dept? shock Scary!
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amother
Turquoise


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 7:08 pm
how is it possible to even accrue that much credit card debt, you need to have had a very high credit limit? but I understand that you were just making a point. It's sad.
Really I've posted this on a similar thread the way people do it is
1. family help (or other help)
2. yerusha
3. good jobs
4. debt
I don't want to include under the table but probably should
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amother
Violet


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 7:21 pm
amother wrote:
how is it possible to even accrue that much credit card debt, you need to have had a very high credit limit? but I understand that you were just making a point. It's sad.
Really I've posted this on a similar thread the way people do it is
1. family help (or other help)
2. yerusha
3. good jobs
4. debt
I don't want to include under the table but probably should


I am surprised no one is menthioning investments. It’s not a solution for everyone. But there are many people who make regular salaries but slowly put $ aside and invest in either real estate or other business opportunities . It’s not like instant 3rd income, but depending on circumstances it’s something extra every month and for sure if it’s real estate it grows in say 5-10-15 years . Many will say but there is no $ to invest. But.... if you have a good credit history, you can take a line of credit from the bank and invest . Yes sure you’ll have a loan to pay off . But very often it isn’t a lot . Because the $ you borrow , is divided into monthly payments. I think for this you need a motivated husband who is able to think out of the box, and is able to take risks. Really legit way to make extra income. That every frum family needs
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amother
Goldenrod


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 7:25 pm
amother wrote:
A very prominent and well-known Rav in Brooklyn told DH that the salary cutoff to live reasonably comfortably is 250K, and that was more than 5 years ago!!


For how many kids?
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amother
Blush


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 7:26 pm
amother wrote:
I am surprised no one is menthioning investments. It’s not a solution for everyone. But there are many people who make regular salaries but slowly put $ aside and invest in either real estate or other business opportunities . It’s not like instant 3rd income, but depending on circumstances it’s something extra every month and for sure if it’s real estate it grows in say 5-10-15 years . Many will say but there is no $ to invest. But.... if you have a good credit history, you can take a line of credit from the bank and invest . Yes sure you’ll have a loan to pay off . But very often it isn’t a lot . Because the $ you borrow , is divided into monthly payments. I think for this you need a motivated husband who is able to think out of the box, and is able to take risks. Really legit way to make extra income. That every frum family needs


Why does it take a motivated husband? Descisions to borrow to invest really need to be jointly made.

What to invest in? Possiblilties are endless.

From reading this thread, stock in frum family clothing store sounds lucrative :-)
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thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 7:28 pm
amother wrote:
how is it possible to even accrue that much credit card debt, you need to have had a very high credit limit? but I understand that you were just making a point. It's sad.
Really I've posted this on a similar thread the way people do it is
1. family help (or other help)
2. yerusha
3. good jobs
4. debt
I don't want to include under the table but probably should

I think she mentioned she had over 50 cards. She said they literally live off the credit cards . Her husband travels a minimum of 8 times a year to Eretz Yisroel and Uman and considers it a necessity.
They are working now on settling all that debt because she is basically maxed out. All they do is try to make minimum payments on their cards monthly, but she said there is so much to keep track of, so she just waits until the cc company calls her with a reminder that her payment is late.


Last edited by thunderstorm on Sun, Apr 15 2018, 7:29 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother
Blush


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 7:28 pm
amother wrote:
For how many kids?


If the mortgage is over 800k, it would be hard with 1 kid.
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amother
Turquoise


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 7:28 pm
violet you are 100% correct. I should have included that, it's a biggie. My DH is a huge proponent in investing, that if you start young enough even a little bit makes a difference. I actually asked a friend recently how she manages- it was normal in the conversation and it was someone who I didn't think would be offended- just trust me! and she said it's because she invested money when first married.
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amother
Maroon


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 7:34 pm
thunderstorm wrote:
I think she mentioned she had over 50 cards. She said they literally live off the credit cards . Her husband travels a minimum of 8 times a year to Eretz Yisroel and Uman and considers it a necessity.
They are working now on settling all that debt because she is basically maxed out. All they do is try to make minimum payments on their cards monthly, but she said there is so much to keep track of, so she just waits until the cc company calls her with a reminder that her payment is late.


that's nuts. never heard of such irresponsible ppl ever. dh and I live decently. we have 3 kids and male about 150k a year. some of the things are mentioned here are not luxuries for some families. for example. I need to send my kids to camp ad I work almost full time. I don't pick the crazy expensive ones but I consent a full summer. bh we do own our own home. I find that food costs me tons. I dress my kids (I think) nicely but I buy cheaper clothes as I am not into names. I buy clothes for myself ad needed but I am not a shopper really. bh we can afford it and are not in any debt.
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mha3484




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 7:55 pm
This is totally why I could never in a million years afford to live in the tri-state. We make a very average salary in a large out of town community. The expenses people post here are way above my means.
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amother
Brunette


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 7:56 pm
amother wrote:
For how many kids?


It was many years ago, but I believe he said for 5-6 kids (real estate was much more affordable then though, so as I said, it's likely even higher today).
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amother
Violet


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 7:58 pm
amother wrote:
Why does it take a motivated husband? Descisions to borrow to invest really need to be jointly made.

What to invest in? Possiblilties are endless.

From reading this thread, stock in frum family clothing store sounds lucrative :-)


Lol about stores. Yes, decisions have to made together. And in our case they are. But my husband knows more about investing than I do. What I mean is if he wasn’t on the lookout for ideas, it would be tough. Does that make sense?
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Queen6




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 8:00 pm
.1 STOP looking at what everyone else is buying and spending. You will save yourself so much heartache.
.2 If you cant stop looking..... you have no idea if they can actually afford the things they buy... many of them can’t.
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amother
Violet


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 8:00 pm
amother wrote:
violet you are 100% correct. I should have included that, it's a biggie. My DH is a huge proponent in investing, that if you start young enough even a little bit makes a difference. I actually asked a friend recently how she manages- it was normal in the conversation and it was someone who I didn't think would be offended- just trust me! and she said it's because she invested money when first married.


Precisely ! And you can start at any point. I think number one is to have good credit, than the bank will work with you.
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amother
Turquoise


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 8:22 pm
we've only invested our own money. we've never taken out debt to do it. That's a lot more risky.

eta: my dh corrected me by saying we took out a mortgage and invested in mutual funds instead of paying more towards our house so I guess I can't actually say we didn't take out debt Wink
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MrsDash




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 8:35 pm
We all Bonnie and Clyde our way through life. duh Dancing
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amother
Seagreen


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 8:38 pm
As someone whose income plus some family help is in the 20k a month range I have the same question.

I do have enough for what I need plus generously giving tzedaka and putting away savings, but looking around I see myself on the lower end of the spectrum when it comes to needs in my community.

I'm guessing that many people with smaller incomes aren't saving or giving charity as much. They probably have some credit card or other debt, or are amazing at shopping deals and bargains (which I hate to do).
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Mommyg8




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 8:44 pm
amother wrote:
As someone whose income plus some family help is in the 20k a month range I have the same question.

I do have enough for what I need plus generously giving tzedaka and putting away savings, but looking around I see myself on the lower end of the spectrum when it comes to needs in my community.

I'm guessing that many people with smaller incomes aren't saving or giving charity as much. They probably have some credit card or other debt, or are amazing at shopping deals and bargains (which I hate to do).


No, they're either getting programs, family help, or tzedakah. Probably all three.

Oh, or HUGE credit card debt. That's number four.
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amother
Amber


 

Post Sun, Apr 15 2018, 8:53 pm
amother wrote:
Programs!
Many are on Food stamps, medicaid and WIC, some even have section 8 and school vouchers.
Many that are on programs, also get tuition breaks, help from various organizations for shabbos/yom tov.

Plus big tax refunds! People who earn very little qualify for EIC.

I've been on the poor end for years and now BH doing ok, not wealthy at all, but can pay what I need to, not for any wants. yet.

I was "better off" when was poor than I am now! I got breaks, tzedaka, programs and refunds!
Now, I need more to make it work, I have to be more careful in the grocery as my budget s smaller than WIC/Food stamps,( I used enable to bu yogurt and ice cream), now I pay for medical insurance and co pays and deductibles. My kids don't have braces as I can't afford, my oldest got free through medicaid.
No family help ever, only survival was gov't and our low paying jobs
DH and I worked very hard, multiple Job to get out of assistance, many though like where they are and dont report income and are on every program under the sun.

Was never and still can't buy clothing in jewish stores, I shop sales in dept stores, chain stores and we manage. No, we don't wear what the neighbors are wearing!

In the past, we managed with gov't help and ow, we manage through good old hard work, we each work 60 hours a week! BH, I see a good future!
GO YOU!!!! Salut
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