What are reasons to switch/ not switch schools?

Log in / Sign Up

List of Forums + New Post Recipe Box Usergroups Following My Posts Bookmarks

Private Messages Advanced Search Rules New User Guide FAQ Advertise Contact Us

Forum -> Chinuch, Education & Schooling

View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother

Denim

Mon, May 14 2018, 4:07 am

I am having some difficulty figuring out if we should move my son to a new school. What are the top reasons TO make a switch and top reasons NOT TO make a switch?

Can experienced mothers please help break that down for me?

Ruchel

Mon, May 14 2018, 4:18 am

INFLUENCE/OTHER STUDENTS is the main.
Then if kodesh level is really lacking, or chol level.
Of course finances matter. But especially in the case of the first time I'd rather homeschool, as inconvenient it is in my country.

momnaturally

Mon, May 14 2018, 5:33 am

The reasons not to switch is since they are used to this school any adjustment is a risk and you never know how the new school will play out so you don't switch unless there is a truly compelling reason.
Also in general you don't want a kid to learn that if things don't work out just avoid things instead of learning in life how to make things work.
With that said there are a number of possible compelling reasons to switch.
What are your reasons ?
If it's an issue with you child it may happen wherever he switches too as well unless he has really overcome it and just needs a place for a fresh start.
Usually the most compelling reasons would be specific issues with the school that are specific to them and would not apply elsewhere like school rules or policys. If this is very detrimental to your child then switching is a logical solution.

amother

Mistyrose

Mon, May 14 2018, 6:12 am

IMO, switching is an absolute must if the child is being affected emotionally. For example bullying, feeling completely overwhelmed by the social or academic expectations, any anxiety related to the setting.

amother

Rose

Mon, May 14 2018, 6:33 am

If a child's academic needs cannot be met in the current environment (for example, gifted or learning differences) it is time to look into other options.

amother

Mustard

Mon, May 14 2018, 6:34 am

I switched my daughter for the last two years of elementary school. She was an excellent student and had good friends, but was dissatisfied with the way certain concepts such as tsniut were being taught. She had also been bullied in the past, and while this had stopped, was unhappy with the administrations' mishandling of the problem. She also wanted a school that would offer better secular studies.

She switched to a school in another town, because she didn't want to attend another local school. It ended up being a great choice for her. She's much more enthusiastic about what she's leaning and found a great group of friends. She's now attending a terrific high school with her friends from elementary and new high school friends.

On the downside, she ended up losing touch with some of her friends from her old school. Also, some people judge her for switching to a school they consider less frum.

I've considered switching a younger child to a school with a better secular program, but decided against it, because he was generally happy in his school and was learning well. Instead I'm trying to supplement his secular studies at home.

amother

Periwinkle

Mon, May 14 2018, 3:05 pm

We are only guessing around, there are many scenarios that would be a big plus to switch schools. If you would put fwd your real life question, we would probably be more effective. you could omit names etc.
if the teacher is not connecting with the students. if the class is overcrowded. if your child refuses to go to school. on the other hand, if you child just want to get her way, instead of dealing with a specific issue, than its not a good idea to teach her to run away from a problem.

amother

Saddlebrown

Mon, May 14 2018, 5:34 pm

When I moved I put my ds I need a new school. I heard great things so I was excited. But my excitement faded real quick, as they had no idea how to deal with ds. He was a lively kid. Turns out he has ADHD. He has language pragmatic issues. All I didn't know then. In the previous school no one complained. And his rebbes just told me he's lively.

The new school couldn't deal with him, he got into trouble, they kicked him out every other week. It was a disaster. That was the first year.

The next year the rebbe was also having severe trouble but in a much harder way. He simply hated my ds. He would say terrible comments about him. I have such bad memories from him. Very close to the end of the year I made up my mind I would switch him, and have him evaluated. By a top neuropsychologist. And was given diagnosis.

The switch to the new school, was the best thing I have done for my son. I feel like there are people that care, wanna work with us. He's on meds. Doing very well. I have principles and rebbes that understands ds. Even while we were working on his meds and he was having horrible side effects the rebbe had great methods to deal with him. This rebbe did not complain. He even to,d us that he doesn't believe in diagnosis.

It was my ds best year ever! He was and is the most amazing rebbe! I will forever be greatful to him! A real mechanich! He looked at the character of the child. His potential and figured our a way how to deal with him. My ds most successful year.

So yes this is my reason for switching. I felt I had no one to talk to. They disliked my son. Talked down at the parents and the child. Yes he had issues and they were not trained or interested in dealing with him or the parents.

Maya

Mon, May 14 2018, 5:45 pm

If a child is generally more unhappy than happy in a particular school environment, that’s a reason to change.

amother

Babypink

Mon, May 14 2018, 6:18 pm

We asked a gadol about it and he said that if a child is happy and learning you don't switch, period. You deal with hashkafa differences at home.

We switched schools after my son was molested and the school would not deal with it.

tweety1

Tue, May 15 2018, 6:23 am

[quote="amother"]We asked a gadol about it and he said that if a child is happy and learning you don't switch, period. You deal with hashkafa differences at home.

Not quite true. Cuz a child can feel that. And a key to a child being successful b'gashmias and b'ruchnius, is that parents and mosad must be on the same page. If not it's a recipe for disaster.
That being said we switched for this reason. We weren't in synch with the chinuch of the mosad; which in away connects to hashkafa. Bh it was a great decision! One that many years later I still don't regret.

amother

Denim

Tue, May 15 2018, 8:52 am

amother wrote:

The current school is not exactly in line with our hashkafa. It is not run very professionally, the teachers are sweet but don't have credentials. My son is generally happy and seems to be learning, but he does come home with stories about fights that he is involved with, boys picking on him etc. He also acts up in class and is quite challenging for the teachers.

The social issues would probably follow him to any school, but I wonder if it would be better for him to be in a more professionally run school with teachers who are certified to do what they are doing...?

amother

White

Tue, May 15 2018, 9:02 am

amother wrote:

It does sound like you should change schools, but I'd advise you also arrange for additional support for your son. Even a professionally run school with credentialed teachers can only do so much with a kid with "issues" and plenty of such schools would decline to even try. However, a school that would be supportive of working with you and whatever team you have in place for him will definitely make a difference. The better trained teachers will be equipped to implement certain accommodations. They will work with you and with therapists. They are likely to have better classroom management skills which means class will be a more structured setting which is very important for children like your son.

Tl;dr I do think it sounds like you should switch, but a) do your homework, make sure to find a school willing to do their best to meet his needs and b) switching is not enough, it seems he needs additional support, and will still need it even in a different school.

Page 1 of 1