I wish... | Imamother

happinessseeker

Mon, May 28 2018, 9:23 am

amother wrote:

When I was younger I was so pretty and especially attractive that the wives of our friends didn’t want to invite us for shabbos. It was very sad for me and my family. Even when I tried to hide from the husband they always cornered me and one even put his hands on my shoulders from the back while he was pretending that he mistaked me for his wife or sister.

This is so disturbing. What kind of community did this take place in?

amother

Indigo

Mon, May 28 2018, 9:29 am

amother wrote:

When I say I wish I was most beautiful, I mean NATURALLY. I once had a sleepover with a friend and saw how she looked in the morning, and I'm embarrassed to say I was so jealous. It's a real middah issue I cannot seem to work on - I really try:(. But anyway, she looked absolutely stunning and all of it was natural. Like perfect. She is so self confident, gets so many compliments, everyone looks up to her and she has such power in making people feel good, like whatever she tells someone nice, literally makes their year. I can't explain it. Anyhow, I can totally relate to your story, happens to me too, and I also want to feel pretty and confident for myself. But, unlike you, when I wear makeup etc I don't feel so confident as I feel like it's a mask - so what, I look pretty, its not really ME. I wish I would be pretty NATURALLY. Then I can feel that I am pretty, not my makeup, not my clothing. Just ME. (I sound so egotistic so just want to add that I really work on my middos and am very sensitive towards others, this is just a huge struggle of mine) What makes it so hard is that I know my husband needed a really pretty girl, and I look pretty for him all the time bec I know he needs it - and he doesn't like how I look w/o makeup. I feel like I myself am not good enough. Only my 'image' is. My makeup. My clothing. And when my makeup smudges and clothing gets food on it, my heart plummets, he notices e/t and comments, and even if he would stop commenting he would still notice and I feel like I'm letting him down

Yes I wish I was naturally pretty too. I would feel confident on yom tov without makeup but truthfully I dont know any naturally pretty women as most ppl wear makeup except my sis in law is naturally pretty but she is overweight and she is sweet eidel.....is not into fashion makeup...

Anyway, I can understand that your wish is to be naturally pretty since your dh always pressures u to look pretty so u feel u can never acheive what he wants without makeup. Well, im sure hes a wonderful dh but im sorry hes putting pressure on u to look pretty. Its very stressful to live with that pressure.