Why are there so many nasty people on imamother?

southernbubby

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 9:21 am

saw50st8 wrote:

I think people tend to be very sensitive. It's OK to disagree and it's OK for people to call you out if you are wrong or misinformed. Some people practice tougher love than others.

The good thing about this is; you can log out. Just imagine if you had to actually deal with some of the more negative personalities IRL daily!

Sometimes if wonder if some fights on here could be people who don't get along with each other IRL but then, it might just be a figment of my imagination. There are some family units on here such as sisters, mothers and daughters, or sister in laws as well as people from small communities who know the identity of other posters.

Just think, you could start your day on here fighting with your MIL Tongue Out

Iymnok

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 9:34 am

Umm, there’s not.
For the most part I’ve encountered lovely ladies. Many with different viewpoints and outlooks than me.
But I’ve learned invaluable things from each one.

southernbubby

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 9:37 am

Iymnok wrote:

Umm, there’s not.
For the most part I’ve encountered lovely ladies. Many with different viewpoints and outlooks than me.
But I’ve learned invaluable things from each one.

There's not what, families with more than one member on here?

My DD is on here but doesn't post, (hi honey if you are reading this Wave

). Her husband's sister is definitely on here.

singleagain

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 9:49 am

Just wanted to add that without tone and body language.... It may be entirely possible, that someone can be reading nasty into something that wasn't meant that way.

Consider the following.

keym

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 9:51 am

singleagain wrote:

Just wanted to add that without tone and body language.... It may be entirely possible, that someone can be reading nasty into something that wasn't meant that way.

Consider the following.

I like this very much.

relish

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 9:58 am

amother wrote:

Gosh, Relish, what a nice thing to say... shock

Wow! I am shocked that you took this as { shock

}
It seems like you are being sarcastic in your post. I wonder why.

I was sincere, and chose my words carefully. I gave you a bit of advise if you wanted it, and then bade you farewell. I like sensitive people.

I'm highly sensitive, and I think that it's one of my biggest assets. I wonder which part you felt was offensive.

Iymnok

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 10:48 am

southernbubby wrote:

There's not what, families with more than one member on here?

My DD is on here but doesn't post, (hi honey if you are reading this Wave

). Her husband's sister is definitely on here.

my post was directly answering the title.

To add, nice people sometimes say nasty things, but that doesn’t make them nasty.

amother

Chocolate

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 10:51 am

relish wrote:

"Take what you need and leave the rest"
-from 12 step meeting

It's good to have a sensitive soul like you op on the forum. I'm sad to hear that you are leaving.

Funny, I thought that was Virgil Caine.

amother

Chocolate

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 1:37 pm

relish wrote:

Could be

Its not funny if it requires explanation -- my bad -- but its from The Night they Drove Old Dixie Down by The Band. The song begins, "Virgil Caine is my name and I served on the Danville train...." Later, it says, "Back with my wife in Tennessee, when one day she called to me / "Virgil, quick, come see, there goes Robert E Lee" / Now I don't mind choppin' wood, and I don't care if the money's no good / Ya take what ya need and ya leave the rest / But they should never have taken the very best

amother

Fuchsia

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 2:46 pm

amother wrote:

Gosh, Relish, what a nice thing to say... shock

Relish was being sincere.

After reading such a sarcastic response like yours (to a really nice and sensitive poster), I say "have a nice life." There will be one less catty mean miserable person on Imamother...

DVOM

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 5:38 pm

I think this world's a mirror, OP. It reflects back at you what you present it with. Be mean and nasty, and you'll get mean and nasty back.

Don't leave. Try being consistently kind, thoughtful, considerate and polite. You might be pleasantly surprised by what you get in return.

crust

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 6:29 pm

DVOM wrote:

The bolded.

If all else fails and you cant have any other positive benefits from imamother, then, at the very least, you can use it as an excellent platform to practice Ahavas Yisroel, patience, and develop your written communication skill.

crust

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 6:31 pm

Iymnok wrote:

Umm, there’s not.
For the most part I’ve encountered lovely ladies. Many with different viewpoints and outlooks than me.
But I’ve learned invaluable things from each one.

I totally agree with this post Iymnok. I have made many good friends here.

33055

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 6:55 pm

DVOM wrote:

I was going to start a thread about why there are so many lovely people on imamother. You answered it. Very Happy

amother

Jade

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 7:00 pm

Personally, I don't post much, and I can't remember the last time any nastiness was directed at me. But there is certainly plenty of bitterness, cynicism, and yes, nastiness too here. Certainly more than I encounter in my social circles IRL. It's the nature of a diverse online forum, and it definitely gets to me sometimes.

southernbubby

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 7:10 pm

amother wrote:

Most people are very nice to me on here unless I remind them too much of their MILs.

miami85

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 7:15 pm

thunderstorm wrote:

Take any group of women this large , even IRL and you will witness the same behavior. You are lucky you haven't been exposed to that IRL.

Just because its "normal" doesn't make it ok

amother

Jade

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 7:59 pm

southernbubby wrote:

Most people are very nice to me on here unless I remind them too much of their MILs.

If you reread my post, you will see that I'm not talking about posts directed at me. It's the overall content that I'm referring to. I'm not complaining about it, just making an observation.

amother

Indigo

Tue, Jun 19 2018, 8:04 pm

Firstly, like many others said, gather a diverse group of women with an anonymous button and everyone will say whatever they feel like.

That being said, it doesn’t excuse the harsh, accusing, insensitive comments people say in real life. When I post something, I am usually well aware that the responses I get may not be supportive. It’s sad but it’s reality.

The one thing I can think of to explain some of it is lack of knowledge. When someone posts something very vague and people make assumptions to fill in the gaps and assume the worst. Also, we’ve got a lot of feminists on here who are eager to call everyone’s dhs abusive. It’s frustrating to see women try to defend their husbands when all they said was they had one disagreement and people are calling abuse