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amother
Salmon


 

Post Tue, May 15 2018, 8:06 pm
amother wrote:
Op, you really need to ask your parents or I lnlaws for help. You mentioned your in laws have lots of money. You don’t need to ask them for tzedakah, ask them for a loan. They will likely help you so you’re not hungry. This is a level of poverty no one can watched a loved one experience. I think you need to put your pride aside and get help from the people who know you. Perhaps your Inlaws can help your dh get his act together.


They have loaned us a small amount of money in the past and it was a very big deal for them . I feel very uncomfortable asking and my husband refuses. They live in their own world and would not understand why we cant be self sufficient on our own. Some people are just not givers...
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amother
Beige


 

Post Wed, May 16 2018, 1:24 am
"Most of our meals are protein(chicken, fish) and fresh veggies, and our monthly food bill is way under $200. "

how??? do you have a farm, you go fishing and plant your own veggies?
how can a family of (how many are you?) eat chicken/fish and fresh veggies dayly and spend only 200 dollars per month? 200 devided by 30 is under 7 dollars per day.



if you are lucky, buy in bulk/on sale you might be able to feed 2 people rice/beans + fruit, noodles in tomatosauce+ cucumber or eggtoast with belpeppers for that money (we like all these dishes Smile ). but chicken and lets say stirfry vegetables cost much more where I live.

please teach me your trick!
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amother
Salmon


 

Post Wed, May 16 2018, 8:55 pm
amother wrote:
"Most of our meals are protein(chicken, fish) and fresh veggies, and our monthly food bill is way under $200. "

how??? do you have a farm, you go fishing and plant your own veggies?
how can a family of (how many are you?) eat chicken/fish and fresh veggies dayly and spend only 200 dollars per month? 200 devided by 30 is under 7 dollars per day.



if you are lucky, buy in bulk/on sale you might be able to feed 2 people rice/beans + fruit, noodles in tomatosauce+ cucumber or eggtoast with belpeppers for that money (we like all these dishes Smile ). but chicken and lets say stirfry vegetables cost much more where I live.

please teach me your trick!


Maybe she lives in Israel where it’s cheaper? Not sure. But I don’t.
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amother
Black


 

Post Wed, May 16 2018, 9:18 pm
I am in a similar situation. Maxxed out all ccs. Just trying to pay for basics forget about the "other" bills on the table...
I will say athough I have stressful moments I also feel so much closer to Hashem. I feel like we did the hishtadlus we needed to do and Hashem wants to give us things in a more "heavenly" fashion rather than a "normal" fashion.
I feel like he is feeding us directly instead of through the wordly channels.
This situation definitely finds me constantly talking to Hashem very emotionally and I am feeling quite close to Him. He is sending me occasionally these random unexpected sources of Parnassa in little bite size increments and in a very unpredictable way.
Just sharing my own life and thoughts.
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amother
Salmon


 

Post Wed, May 16 2018, 9:23 pm
amother wrote:
I am in a similar situation. Maxxed out all ccs. Just trying to pay for basics forget about the "other" bills on the table...
I will say athough I have stressful moments I also feel so much closer to Hashem. I feel like we did the hishtadlus we needed to do and Hashem wants to give us things in a more "heavenly" fashion rather than a "normal" fashion.
I feel like he is feeding us directly instead of through the wordly channels.
This situation definitely finds me constantly talking to Hashem very emotionally and I am feeling quite close to Him. He is sending me occasionally these random unexpected sources of Parnassa in little bite size increments and in a very unpredictable way.
Just sharing my own life and thoughts.


Thank you for sharing. I appreciate the chizuk and hope to have as much emunah like you do someday soon. I feel Hashems presence. I’m just not sure why I have to go through such a hard nisayon. I am trying so hard to do the right thing and being 100% honest and emesdik in my snap application and other financial decisions.
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amother
Salmon


 

Post Mon, Jun 25 2018, 5:36 pm
Just got rejected for SNAP because we are “making too much money”. We are so broke, everything is maxed and negative. 😢
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amother
Slategray


 

Post Mon, Jun 25 2018, 5:46 pm
amother wrote:
Just got rejected for SNAP because we are “making too much money”. We are so broke, everything is maxed and negative. 😢


Has your husband sat down with his parents and laid this all out for them?
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amother
Salmon


 

Post Tue, Jun 26 2018, 11:46 am
amother wrote:
Has your husband sat down with his parents and laid this all out for them?


No. That’s not an option. It would be extremely uncomfortable and Ppl are just not givers. Even within family. They would just give speech about how we are not doing enough.
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amother
Slategray


 

Post Tue, Jun 26 2018, 11:54 am
amother wrote:
No. That’s not an option. It would be extremely uncomfortable and Ppl are just not givers. Even within family. They would just give speech about how we are not doing enough.


I didn't suggest it as an 'option' regarding how to get more money.

Your situation is already extremely uncomfortable - dire even?

Maybe they are rotten people, even so they should know that their son is suffering. What really is gained by keeping this a big secret.
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amother
Silver


 

Post Tue, Jun 26 2018, 3:08 pm
I've been in this kind of situation and I couldn't ask for family help either.
Every family is different.

Regarding $200 for food, I've been broke enough that I've made that work for a family of 7, obviously only the cheapest ingredients and everything home made.
When there's no money for food, you manage with what you have.

We were also making too much for food stamps, but not enough to cover basics
utilities sut off, schools kicking kids out, almost foreclosure, been there done that.

Bh, we're now in a better place, not wealthy at all but can pay our bills, can buy occasional fish, chicken or meat.
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amother
Periwinkle


 

Post Tue, Jun 26 2018, 4:35 pm
amother wrote:
"Most of our meals are protein(chicken, fish) and fresh veggies, and our monthly food bill is way under $200. "

how??? do you have a farm, you go fishing and plant your own veggies?
how can a family of (how many are you?) eat chicken/fish and fresh veggies dayly and spend only 200 dollars per month? 200 devided by 30 is under 7 dollars per day.



if you are lucky, buy in bulk/on sale you might be able to feed 2 people rice/beans + fruit, noodles in tomatosauce+ cucumber or eggtoast with belpeppers for that money (we like all these dishes Smile ). but chicken and lets say stirfry vegetables cost much more where I live.

please teach me your trick!


Hi!
That was me..
No, I live in NY..
BH my financial situation has improved and my budget is now $300.. although I definitely splurge as long as my total budget for the month is under control. (For example I didn't spend that much for miscellaneous items)
This was for a couple - 2 ppl.
Chicken- it was mostly chicken breast @ 3.69 per lb - 1 family pack (uncleaned) was enough for 3 1/2 nights dinner. Chicken on the bone is even cheaper.. fish we would buy salmon from Costco.. we wouldn't eat it often.. one night a week (usually Thursday) we would make a lighter dinner (more out of exhaustion more than necessity) and Sundays were probably leftovers from Shabbos..
Veggies- we bought at a market that was extremely cheap.. we had to travel to it but it was worth it and they were SO fresh we could buy for 2 weeks at a time.. we only bought whatever was in season and reallllly cheap.. so 2 heads of cauliflower for $3 cucumbers for 39 cents a lb etc I think the cheapest we got avocadoes for was 50 cents..
Looking back, we did what we had to do... Now we buy dairy, but back then, it was a luxury... (Other than milk) even today, I find that dairy products are very expensive. (And consider string cheese a splurge, the family pack costs $10!)
It's hard, I'll admit that. (And by personality is that I love finding a good deal.. so I'm sure that helps)
Hashem should send us all Parnassa B'Revach and the ability to feed our families b'li tirdah!!
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amother
Salmon


 

Post Wed, Jun 27 2018, 4:55 am
Amen!!!!! And thanks for all the advice. Where was this cheap market ?
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amother
Periwinkle


 

Post Thu, Jun 28 2018, 9:58 am
amother wrote:
Amen!!!!! And thanks for all the advice. Where was this cheap market ?


Theres more than one of them - ft. Hamilton in Brooklyn has a few for example.

Some of the deals This week include -
a large head of cauliflower is 1.29
Seedless watermelon 45 cents
Long green cucumbers - 5 for 69 cents
Red skin potatoes 39 cents a lb
Zucchini squash 39 cents a lb
Kiwis 10 for a $1
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amother
Salmon


 

Post Thu, Jun 28 2018, 6:32 pm
Wow! That is cheap! Too bad I don’t live in Brooklyn
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amother
Periwinkle


 

Post Fri, Jun 29 2018, 10:07 am
amother wrote:
Wow! That is cheap! Too bad I don’t live in Brooklyn

I don't live in Brooklyn either..
Where do u live I can try to find something near you
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