Creating the spirit

rca613

Fri, Jul 06 2018, 6:38 pm

BH we just closed on our first home in am OOT community. This is a big step for our marriage, our family, just all around huge! The one thing that DH and I kept emphasizing in this move was that we are doing it leshem shamayim (More wholesome, less materialistic, emphasis on family values, etc)

Now, as we are getting ready, I would love to hear how my fellow imamothers go about creating a spirit of kedusha in the home. I so badly want my home to be one of Torah and growth. My husband does the learnin' and earnin' ... what can I do as wife/mother/small town community member to instill a love of yiddishkeit in my children?

tichellady

Fri, Jul 06 2018, 8:21 pm

I think it needs to be authentic and natural for you, some ideas
1. Hosting guests on shabbos
2. Making parsha themed Shabbat food
3. Learning with your kids
4. Having a weekly or monthly chesed or learning goal as a family
5. Playing a special game as a family on shabbos, or having special toys or something like that depending on the ages of your kids

Rappel

Sat, Jul 07 2018, 4:30 pm

Not that I'm an expert. My kids are still young.

But some things I do to feel authentically Jewish:
Pray berachot
Invite a neighbor over so we can dance and sing kabbalat Shabbat
Join a parsha chabura - each of us teaches one Aliyah to the others - and prioritize it.
Play Jewish music
Prioritize attending good shiurim.
Get halacha sources in English - and read them!
Listen to source-heavy shiurim while I clean

amother

Slategray

Sat, Jul 07 2018, 11:50 pm

Davening every day in a siddur. No matter how little, but making it a priority to connect with Hashem in a consistent manner does wonders for yourself and as an example for your children. And you can daven for Hashem to give you the kochos and the ideas to create the spirit you are seeking and to help you raise your children to be yarei shamayim and ohavei Hashem.

FranticFrummie

Sun, Jul 08 2018, 8:28 am

Everything you do, do b'simcha. If your kids see you acting like "It's hard to be a Jew", they will pick up on it. You have to really feel the joy.

Ruchel

Sun, Jul 08 2018, 10:30 am

Posters of rabbis. Pics of family. Family tree. Explain traditions and origins. It makes for a special atmosphere. Random non Jews have picked up on this visiting here.

salt

Mon, Jul 09 2018, 6:17 am

Open your home to people less fortunate than you. As is says in Pirkei avot:
יהי ביתך פתוח לרוחה, ויהיו עניים בני ביתך

TranquilityAndPeace

Mon, Jul 09 2018, 7:40 am

What a wonderful post! Mazel Tov on the new home!

Another idea, Not yet mentioned, if you can,

יהי ביתך בית ועד לתלמידי חכמים

As it says in Pirkei Avos. See if you can have visiting rabbis stay in your home. Host parlor meetings. Host tzedakkah events where rabbis speak. Host a Shabbos or weekday shiur.

amother

Lemon

Mon, Jul 09 2018, 7:48 am

Talk about Hashem a lot!

Explain to your children what each Bracha means and help them say it each time.

It might not be easy to have guests often when kids are young. It’s up to you to make a home of Torah values. Teach your kids about mitzvos, don’t allow non Jewish videos...

Constantly thank Hashem for everything in front of your children.

rca613

Mon, Jul 09 2018, 1:48 pm

OP here. Wow what replies!!!! I love love love these and I'll be printing them out to keep in mind iyH.
Something else that I thought of is to have a hakarat hatov board, write something were grateful for as often as we can.
I guess the only thing that holds me back, so to speak, is thinking about how others react to it. I've gotten comments before like "this isn't a classroom" or that it isn't classy or whatever, but honestly, it's my own insecurities of being the "frummy".. BH my DH is 100% on board with anything so that's what matters most.

Rachel Shira

Mon, Jul 09 2018, 1:52 pm

rca613 wrote:

You can make it look classy and homey with one of those fabric covered bulletin boards with the criss cross ribbons, or similar. Use nice paper that matches your decor, or something neutral, not colorful post it notes, and hang it in your kitchen. I think it’s a really nice idea.

InnerMe

Mon, Jul 09 2018, 1:59 pm

rca613 wrote:

Mazel Tov on your new home!

I am so inspired by your goals! Just the fact that you have such goals, already go a long way in building the kind of home you want to build!

As rachel shira said, you can get some nicer material/ board to make it look more classy, but hey, who are random people to tell you what your home is or isn't?

amother

Purple

Mon, Jul 09 2018, 5:23 pm

mazal tov.
someone once taught me something I kept on board always.
speak about hashem often. to your kids, to your husband, infront of your kids, to yourself.
"hashem thanks for the great parking space when it's raining so hard today."
"hashem pleaee make sure this challah comes out the best as I habe guests I want to feel happy "
the kids pick up on it and will.copy you.

happymom123

Mon, Jul 09 2018, 6:28 pm

FranticFrummie wrote:

Everything you do, do b'simcha. If your kids see you acting like "It's hard to be a Jew", they will pick up on it. You have to really feel the joy.

Mazel tov on your new home!

I'm too young to have any advice from personal experience but I have to second what FranticFrummie said. My mother always had a positive and warm attitude to everything Yiddishkeit related and instilled in us a pride to be what our peers could label "a frummy". Looking back, I think that shaped so much of who I am and I'm so grateful that Yiddishkeit was front and center in our lives with an excitement and passion