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Forum -> Children's Health
My son keeps washing his hands



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amother
Gold


 

Post Mon, Jul 23 2018, 2:04 am
He is 8, a bit of an anxious kid. The hand washing is driving me a little crazy and I find myself commenting on it, questioning him and getting frustrated. I realize that this is not the right approach.

If you have dealt with this- what is the best way to help my child?
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amother
Salmon


 

Post Mon, Jul 23 2018, 2:08 am
amother wrote:
He is 8, a bit of an anxious kid. The hand washing is driving me a little crazy and I find myself commenting on it, questioning him and getting frustrated. I realize that this is not the right approach.

If you have dealt with this- what is the best way to help my child?


Call.eitza.organizarltion
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amother
Brown


 

Post Sun, Jul 29 2018, 5:50 pm
Sounds like it could be OCD, especially if he is anxious also. I have this kind of OCD. Commenting is not helpful, and probably makes him more anxious (which will just increase the behavior). I know it must be hard for you not to comment, but you can hold back (and each time you feel like you can't resist the urge to comment, understand that the urge he has to wash his hands is just like that feeling x1000 - it will give yo usome empathy for him and remind yo uthat commenting on something that compulsive will not help).

You could try to talk to him about the hand washing sometime when he isn't doing it, but do not try to explain to him why he shouldn't, why it's irrational, why it's unnecessary, or anything else - invalidating someone's irrational thoughts or behavior usually only makes it worse in the long run. So if you ask, listen to what he has to say, tell him you are glad he shared with you, and make no comments on his thoughts, feelings, or behavior, aside from telling him you are there any time he wants to talk or is having a hard time. And if you ask and he says he doesn't want to discuss it, pushing him will also only make it worse in the long run, so leave it be.

Please take him to a child psychologist who specializes in OCD and other childhood mental health issues - the sooner he is diagnosed (whether OCD or something else), the easier his treatment will go. You could also try reading the book 'Loving Someone With OCD' (https://www.amazon.com/Loving-Someone-OCD-Help-Family/dp/1572243295) to help you better understand and interact with your son, but you'll need a psychologist to treat him if it is OCD.
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amother
Goldenrod


 

Post Sun, Jul 29 2018, 10:14 pm
I recommend this book:
Freeing Your Child from Anxiety: Powerful, Practical Solutions to Overcome Your Child's Fears, Worries, and Phobias
Book by Tamar Ellsas Chansky
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oneofakind




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Aug 08 2018, 6:31 am
Great book but not helpful for OCD. Try Aureen Pinto Wagner's book on OCD but you probably need a therapist.
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amother
Brunette


 

Post Wed, Aug 08 2018, 6:49 am
Please, I’m begging you, can you take him to a child psychologist that specializes in CBT for OCD? If it’s not that then you wasted some time and money (not saying it’s easy). But if it is you’ll be saving him from a lifetime of misery. The sooner these are treated the easier to get rid of, and if any new behaviors crop up, he already has someone to go to to work with.
(Hopefully it’s not that. Maybe he’s got sensory stuff going on or something else) if you want a recommendation I have someone great.
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amother
Aubergine


 

Post Wed, Aug 08 2018, 8:50 am
This sounds very much like OCD, which must be treated by a psychologist before it becomes much much worse. Alternatively, research PANDAS.
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amother
Brunette


 

Post Wed, Aug 08 2018, 8:58 am
amother wrote:
Please, I’m begging you, can you take him to a child psychologist that specializes in CBT for OCD? If it’s not that then you wasted some time and money (not saying it’s easy). But if it is you’ll be saving him from a lifetime of misery. The sooner these are treated the easier to get rid of, and if any new behaviors crop up, he already has someone to go to to work with.
(Hopefully it’s not that. Maybe he’s got sensory stuff going on or something else) if you want a recommendation I have someone great.


I always wonder how my life would have been different had my parents noticed and gotten me help.
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amother
Blush


 

Post Wed, Aug 08 2018, 9:07 am
Before jumping to conclusions that he has ocd first think about what you consider to be too much hand washing. Is he washing his hands every time he comes inside before he eats anything and after every bathroom visit? That could add up to 20 times a day but is perfectly normal.
If you are not a big hand washer then you will think he’s overdoing it. Like my sister who keeps a messy house thinks her child is ocd because he is always cleaning his room.

Pay attention to what circumstances does he wash his hands. Does he wash his hands several times in a row? Does he act bothered and anxious for a little while and then run and wash his hands not related to eating bathroom or playing outside?
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amother
Linen


 

Post Wed, Aug 08 2018, 11:25 am
amother wrote:
This sounds very much like OCD, which must be treated by a psychologist before it becomes much much worse. Alternatively, research PANDAS.
It doesn't have to be either or. OCD is a description of a set of symptoms, pandas is about the potential cause behind those symptoms.
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mfb




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Aug 08 2018, 2:08 pm
I know a child when asked why he said because he learned that if you touch your scalp, shoe, ear wax..... you have to wash your hands so that’s what he was doing every time he touched one of them. That child was told to only wash before eating/saying a brachah and not stop in middle of playing cuz he touched his shoe.
Maybe ask your child why he’s washing
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oneofakind




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Aug 08 2018, 2:22 pm
There's a difference if it's from pandas or OCD. Pandas requires antibiotics and possibly therapy. OCD requires therapy and only in extreme cases, added medication.
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oneofakind




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Aug 08 2018, 2:24 pm
Also pandas can present in different ways, not just OCD.
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amother
Slateblue


 

Post Wed, Aug 08 2018, 3:57 pm
My son had pandas and kept washing his hands. Bh he went on antibiotics (zithromax) and the excessive handwashing stopped soon after.
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