At what age do kids need to start school/playgroup?

flowerpower

Mon, Aug 13 2018, 9:46 pm

pesek zman wrote:

Full time (9 hours a day, 5 days a week,12 months a year excluding legal holidays) is about 25k

What? That is insane!!!!!!!

Here the average is $400 a month from 9-3. Some playgroups offer extendsd hours. Some offer transportation.

Op, depends on your child and what your situation is. Don’t listen to anyone but your own mind!

amother

Yellow

Mon, Aug 13 2018, 9:53 pm

kid one was home till 4.5. Kid two was home till 3. kid three home till 3. If you don't need to send out for work, little kids do great at home. Kids need some social stimulation at about 3. But siblings and neighbors count as social stimulation. I kept my oldest home longer because he was having a lot of anxiety and other psychological challenges. Plenty of people homeschool and their kids do great.

pesek zman

Mon, Aug 13 2018, 10:47 pm

flowerpower wrote:

And where I live, what I pay is below average. Daycare closer to where I live (as opposed to near where I work) would be a lot more. (I'm guessing you live in Lakewood or Brooklyn)

amother

Gold

Tue, Aug 14 2018, 12:45 am

amother wrote:

Because their husband is learning and they are either still in college or working as a secretary.

Again, obviously I'm in the young-married stage.

Please stop looking at other people and assuming you know what their parents pay for! You HAVE NO CLUE!! I'm on the opposite side. People think I have it all. If only they knew. Husband learning plus wife in college does not equal parents pay for everything.

It looks to me like you're bothered by the fact that the rich parents pay, not that the kids go to playgroup. Just do what works for you and your family and stop looking at other people.

Tue, Aug 14 2018, 6:23 am

By law, school is mandated at 5 or 6. Today people send kids at 18 months or less because they work or because they don’t have patience to their kids. At about 2-3 years of age children are generally ready to socialize and learn from others. Until then they are too self centered. It is up to you to decide what you want to do.

Tue, Aug 14 2018, 6:31 am

amother wrote:

Why?

One to one is better for children who their parents are mentally and physically involved, invested and attending to the child’s development. Not for everyone. Parents who would rather do something else should rather send their kids to playgroup so they can at least absorb in a mass-production way. At this age kids naturally learn exponentially faster and not being invested in the process can hurt the child’s development.

amother

Amber

Wed, Aug 15 2018, 11:05 pm

Two of my children (a boy and a girl) were home until past age 4, so they started school one year before pre1A, because I wasn't working at the time and had to pay tuition for older children. Most people in my area do send to playgroup by age 3, even if there is a parent at home, so this was unusual. My kids did interact with each other and other siblings at home, and did things around the house or ran errands with me.

People expressed surprise when they asked and I told them I'd be keeping my kids home with me. Some implied my children were backward, or that I would make them so by depriving them of an education.

By the time they started school they both knew the ABCs and counting and simple math. They also knew the aleph-beis and about yomim tovim and the parsha. They picked up most of this from games we played at home or from chores and errands or from listening to me review with their siblings, but I made sure to teach what was missing.

They were also very interested in mitzvah notes but didn't quite understand how they worked. I would write notes for my older kids when they dressed for school quickly and were ready on time. So one morning my toddler son asked me to write one for him. I asked him what I should write, and who I should give the note to. He told me that I should give the note to Daddy, and that it should say that I dressed him and his baby sister and that they were both very good.

They are now in junior high and high school and both have B"H been successful academically and socially since starting school.

Wed, Aug 15 2018, 11:25 pm

amother wrote:

There's definitely a very positive learning and loving atmosphere and attitude around you which many people can only dream of having. For this reason it's actually better for them to stay home. This is not the case with most families.

amother

Amber

Wed, Aug 15 2018, 11:38 pm

tf wrote:

Of course. I was lucky that it worked out for me and I didn't need to work then. So many mothers don't have that choice. Also, my younger kids had each other as playmates during the day (and their older siblings before and after school).

I was a little worried that adjusting to school would be challenging because they weren't used to being around so many children their age but they both did fine B"H.

Even if there are no siblings around as playmates, I don't think it's always necessary to send to playgroup before age 3 if your child has the opportunity to interact with other kids on playdates or at the playground etc.

I was just posting my experiences because I don't think people should feel that playgroup at age 2 is always a necessity or that their child won't do well later without it.

nylon

Thu, Aug 16 2018, 1:18 am

Oy. No. THat's not how it works. Daycare does not ruin children.

WHat is "need"? Do you mean babysitter vs. group setting, or need in general? The former is up to you, I'd say between 2.5-3 they start having more fun in the group setting and seeing a benefit. But that's for a child you're already paying to send.

If you're home, send when you are comfortable and you feel your child will get something out of it. There's no "have to," though I think it's best to have some preschool. Both of mine started at 3. Older one got 2 years of preschool, younger one got 3 (#2 just missed a cutoff). Both did fine. I know kids who have gone for even less, though at least a year is good so they get used to being in a classroom with a schedule and rules (this is the most important thing they learn, more than ABCs/alef-bet or anything).