This is really difficult - need some chizuk

Log in / Sign Up

List of Forums + New Post Recipe Box Usergroups Following My Posts Bookmarks

Private Messages Advanced Search Rules New User Guide FAQ Advertise Contact Us

Forum -> Interesting Discussions -> Inspirational

View latest: 24h 48h 72h

amother

Olive

Tue, Sep 04 2018, 8:23 pm

I don't want to call this an addiction or anything... I love to read, especially nice clean fiction which helps me relax & not think about difficulties.

I am trying very hard to give up secular fiction for at least aseres ymei teshuvah, hopefully Tishrei. Well, I thought, I ought to start with Slichos BUT I was in the middle of a book last Friday & motzai Shabbos I decided I'm just going to to finish...

True, I am getting more things done as I relax less, but I do need the down time. I have lot's of non-fiction to read, but it's just not as relaxing, more the type that makes you think, you know?

I've got plenty of Jewish novels to re-read, so I can do that too ... anyone can relate? Give some words of encouragement?

thunderstorm

Tue, Sep 04 2018, 8:26 pm

amother wrote:

All I can say is kol hakavod to you. I'm nowhere near that madreiga to take that upon myself. I'm truly impressed.

amother

Olive

Tue, Sep 04 2018, 9:44 pm

Particularly since I'm still buying books on ebay...

Also because I used to be able to take a sefer & learn parsha with Rashi or at least Midrash says, and I find I have not ability to concentrate...

imasinger

Tue, Sep 04 2018, 9:54 pm

thunderstorm wrote:

All I can say is kol hakavod to you. I'm nowhere near that madreiga to take that upon myself. I'm truly impressed.

This!

ellacoe

Tue, Sep 04 2018, 10:41 pm

I have found that sometimes taking things away is not the answer. But rather adding things. I tried to stop reading secular books on Shabat and found that it was not enhancing my Shabat. So instead I let myself read appropriate secular things but in order to enhance Shabat I added things. I added certain things to say (I.e. made a point of saying Perkei Avos) and I added reading a certain amount of Shabat related reading. So if your goal is to make Aseres Yemi Tushava more meaningful maybe find things to add that would do that instead of taking away something that is in no way inappropriate that you enjoy.

amother

Olive

Tue, Sep 04 2018, 11:10 pm

Thanks, Ellacoe, sound like a good idea!

amother

Blue

Wed, Sep 05 2018, 4:41 am

ellacoe wrote:

I'll take it even further. In every secular book you read, try to find something that relates to the parsha. You'd be amazed, when your main focus is on Torah, how you can start to see things through its prism.

champagne

Wed, Sep 05 2018, 5:06 am

Does nonfiction interest you? I let myself read books that talk about Hashem’s world like books on cognitive science, or self help books. They can still be quite a pleasure to read yet don’t seem like a waste of time. If you’re interested I recommend Malcolm Gladwell for interesting science-y books.

JoyInTheMorning

Wed, Sep 05 2018, 6:40 am

Modify your resolution. Read clean secular authors like Jane Austen. You'll improve your vocabulary, give your mind a workout, and develop empathy (one of the chief advantages of reading fiction), and you'll still be able to relax.

oneofakind

Wed, Sep 05 2018, 7:26 am

I found when I added more light Jewish reading, I simply didn't have as much time for secular reading. Very admirable what you are doing.

amother

Orange

Wed, Sep 05 2018, 9:50 am

Good luck!
I give up internet during Aseres Yemei Teshuva but I'll still read secular books.
I think that we can't say no to too many big things at once.

ShishKabob

Wed, Sep 05 2018, 12:35 pm

You are amazing and very inspirational! Perfect for the month of Elul.
It says: pischu lee pesach kchudo shel machat...
and you are doing wayyyy more!
Wishing you lots of hatzlocha in your endeavors!
Ksiva vchasima tova!

amother

Olive

Wed, Sep 05 2018, 4:44 pm

Quote:

I have lots of those, I think I read everything by Gladwell.

I recently read Across the Sabbat River. It was quite interesting, but not enough to keep me up late, took me a few days to finish (another issue with fiction - I can almost never go to sleep in the middle of a book.)

Things I'm in the middle of but not very motivated to finish:
The Surrendered Wife
Healthy Pleasures (not bad but keeps making me think I should be doing something...)
Why don't I do the things that are good for me
Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married - Gary Chapman

I have The Gifts of the Jews, didn't start that yet. That I would even read on Shabbos if desperate.

Interesting idea about Internet, but I need it for work and I am way not disciplined enough not to use it for other things... also if I don't read fiction I spend more time online so maybe I should think about that.

One problem is I can't really discuss w DH who thinks I should never read secular literature so he's not going to be very sympathetic.

Page 1 of 1