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Serving Buffet Style Vs. Serving Individual Portions
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amother
Floralwhite


 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 12:11 pm
my mil is so exact that for a meal w 10 shel ladle 10 ladles of soup & freeze. catasrophe begins when soup containers get confused & she by mistake took out the soup w 10 spoons for the meal where she only has 8 pple & for next meal only stays with the container of 8 spoons when she has 10 pple. panic attack!
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amother
Jade


 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 12:43 pm
If I have less than 6 adults at the table, I serve each person in the kitchen. I make my family's plates, as well as any other kids at the table (asking their mother's for input for their children's plates). I give the women the option of sieving themselves and their husbands, or if they want me to make them a plate, explaining that I would much rather serve myself if I were at someone else's house. (I am a very picky eater and have allergies, and GI issues, so I am particular about what I eat and would very much NOT appreciate someone else making my plate or the discomfort of having to explain my food choices to the hostess.)
If I have a much larger crowd (only happened twice in 8 years, so very uncommon), then I will serve family style, but my husband always likes me to make him a plate.
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SixOfWands




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 1:00 pm
amother wrote:
my mil is so exact that for a meal w 10 shel ladle 10 ladles of soup & freeze. catasrophe begins when soup containers get confused & she by mistake took out the soup w 10 spoons for the meal where she only has 8 pple & for next meal only stays with the container of 8 spoons when she has 10 pple. panic attack!



Does she account for evaporation?

This is just bizarre, IMNSHO.
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Ema of 5




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 1:09 pm
MiracleMama wrote:
This drives me crazy. On the one hand, always good to be mindful of waste. But when an adult tells me "please make sure there's no celery in my bowl but I'd love extra carrots" it really annoys me. How long do I have to be in the kitchen fishing out/ avoiding ingredients for people? Just take your soup and eat around what you don't like! Every time we have guests there are so many special requests surrounding soup. I can't even imagine the number of special requests that would come in if I tried plating people's food. So even though I think plating is elegant - it's not practical in any way. Buffet all the way!

To avoid this, I put all the vegetables into a serving bowl and put that out on the table. Anyone who wants soup just gets clear broth, and the. They can take whatever vegetables they want. I put the chicken and pupiks into a bowl and put that on the table as well.
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dankbar




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 1:34 pm
I just asked my bochur who was dorming last few yrs & was eating out shabbosim at diff families as a grp, he says wherever he got a full portion served he wud polish the plate & wherever it was just in center of table he wud be too embarrased even to take one spoon....& wud just stay right there!
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flowerpower




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 2:21 pm
dankbar wrote:
I just asked my bochur who was dorming last few yrs & was eating out shabbosim at diff families as a grp, he says wherever he got a full portion served he wud polish the plate & wherever it was just in center of table he wud be too embarrased even to take one spoon....& wud just stay right there!



That was my thought too. That is another reason why I prefer plating. What I also do is bring all leftovers( after I served everyone) in and let people help themselves with doubles.
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amother
Yellow


 

Post Fri, Sep 21 2018, 2:27 pm
dankbar wrote:
I just asked my bochur who was dorming last few yrs & was eating out shabbosim at diff families as a grp, he says wherever he got a full portion served he wud polish the plate & wherever it was just in center of table he wud be too embarrased even to take one spoon....& wud just stay right there!

Yeps. That's why I plate.

I once discussed this with people who are "eaters", one overweight and one normal, meaning that they both tend to eat more than others but one needs it one doesn't... and they both said they feel very self-conscious with platters in middle of the table. Like, everyone is soooooooooooooo "stuffed" and barely pecking at the platters, while they're ready to eat up the contents of the entire platter (because the platters are so small, because who still has room in their stomach to eat?!)
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amother
Violet


 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 12:23 pm
amother wrote:
Yeps. That's why I plate.

I once discussed this with people who are "eaters", one overweight and one normal, meaning that they both tend to eat more than others but one needs it one doesn't... and they both said they feel very self-conscious with platters in middle of the table. Like, everyone is soooooooooooooo "stuffed" and barely pecking at the platters, while they're ready to eat up the contents of the entire platter (because the platters are so small, because who still has room in their stomach to eat?!)


I don't understand what the solution would be. Would you then put overly generous portions on every plate so that the 'eaters' won't feel self-conscious about needing more? But then most of the table would feel like they need to stuff themselves so they don't offend their host by leaving half the plate. Or you would end up throwing out half the stuff.

Most of my guests are not self conscious, but if I see someone who hasn't helped himself properly, I will ask him if I can put some chicken and potatoes and salad on his plate. Usually they will agree to at least some of it. If they don't want, I don't press it.
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dankbar




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 7:17 pm
exactly. my son says that when host saw hes not touching anything from center plate then they wud serve him a plate from the center plate....
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dankbar




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 7:23 pm
ive had guests & have been a guest already at diff pple. one host only served me & dh a portion w a lil of everything she had & my kids were asked to look at our portions & say what they wud like & only served them those, so no waste w picky eaters. one host makes huge variety, so instead of lugging everthing to table, every mom was asked to come into kitchen to c what there is & serve their own hubs, kids & themselves with what they like
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dankbar




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 7:28 pm
this host topped it off! come to main course on fri night, only her own hub was served a portion! was there with only part of my fam! waiting for my porton to come or center.....nothing! when my kid was nagging for a pc of kugel....I asked her if he can have....she says sorry theres no more food left....my kids ate up everything on fri afternoon....I had no clue that u or ur kids wud want a portion.....bc here only my hub eats....the rest r stuffed past the soup....
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amother
Ginger


 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 8:18 pm
watergirl wrote:
Right, if I dont like whats served, I may take a bit to taste it and waste as little as possible. So lets say I dont like white meat, I just wont take it. Isnt that better than me taking it and then throwing it out? A chicken breast that I can serve again later in the week is now rat food. I guess the other option is me standing and taking orders and then pleading to my guests specifications from the kitchen. Does anybody do that? It’s tedious enough when I am surving soup and I get requests for no veg, no chicken, only white meat chicken, etc.


My MIL serves chicken soup by request as to who wants what in their bowl. It takes forever. My mom can't stand doing that. She makes her soup more like stock, then adds soup veggies in a cheesecloth bag for the last while of cooking. When she serves the soup Friday night she gives everyone just broth and puts the veggies in a serving bowls that gets passed around so everyone can take what they like.
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flowerpower




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 8:56 pm
dankbar wrote:
this host topped it off! come to main course on fri night, only her own hub was served a portion! was there with only part of my fam! waiting for my porton to come or center.....nothing! when my kid was nagging for a pc of kugel....I asked her if he can have....she says sorry theres no more food left....my kids ate up everything on fri afternoon....I had no clue that u or ur kids wud want a portion.....bc here only my hub eats....the rest r stuffed past the soup....



Omg!!! Are you serious???
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dankbar




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 10:16 pm
yes its real! she was the one to invite me not the opposite. it was last min due to an emergency crisis
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amother
Violet


 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 10:23 pm
dankbar wrote:
yes its real! she was the one to invite me not the opposite. it was last min due to an emergency crisis


Then I can understand. She already planned the meal the way her family eats. She was gracious enough to invite you at the last minute, but she didnt have the time to redo her entire menu.
Of course it would've been smarter on her part to give her dh the only piece of kugel at a different time, but she did what they are used to.
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dankbar




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 10:29 pm
I appreciate her inviting, & maybe her cooking was done already when she invited, but just as she saves one portion from all food eaten for toamhu for her hub by the meal she cudve saved one portion for me, or at least ask me if I wanted a portion & share it.....in my own home pple r full by time comes to main course bc everyone fills up before zman, but I didnt have any toamehu that day bc I didnt cook & was starved by the meal.
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dankbar




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 10:32 pm
if I have a guest unexpectedly & see there isnt enough food I wud rather serve the guest & not take for myself....just saying....
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DrMom




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 11:09 pm
I prefer - both as a guest and a hostess -- family style or buffet (for v. large crowds).

I am not a big eater, so if I am served plated food, I wind up throwing lots of it away. If it is buffet/family style, I can take exactly what I want.

From my p.o.v. as a hostess, it is a patchke to arrange food on everyone's plate. Much easier to arrange some nice platters.

I find it odd that someone would purposely plate my food to prevent me from overeating. What am I, four years old?
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imasoftov




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 11:18 pm
dankbar wrote:
my hub claims that men dont like to be bothered serving themselves

Mine says that men are different from one another but that's probably just him ...
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momX4




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 22 2018, 11:20 pm
When I had yeshiva boys over, I cooked extra food. I played the food and put extra in the middle. DH allways helped himself to more food and tried to "sell" the food. No one felt embarrassed taking more, if they did, they had a full plate already.

Now that my family grew, when we have company I plate all the courses except the main. I usually have different main and side dishes and it's easier to serve family style than to ask everyone what they want.
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