"The Marrying of Chani Kaufman"

WhatFor

Wed, Oct 03 2018, 6:22 am

It wasn't terrible but I wasn't sucked into the plot like I would've liked to have been.

Also some things were just wrong, like the father blessing the food before a regular weekday dinner and the family saying amen before eating. Made me think that the author had attended a Friday night dinner and assumed that all meals are like that in a frum home. Or like the rebbetzin telling Chani that some couples don't touch at all during niddah but that would be up to her and her husband to decide- NOPE. No frum rebbetzin would make it seem like not touching during niddah is optional. (Sure, some teaching to less frum might say, "this is the halacha and what you do is up to you", but Chani was a regular right-wing frum girl marrying a learning boy, so no way.)

I was also actually offended by her descriptions of right-wing frum culture. The first one that pops into my head right now is her description of the men dancing at the wedding swarming out like rats. I noticed a lot of her descriptions were not very charitable - describing congealed chicken on Friday night, the food never seems to be good, the characters generally seem to have dry skin and smell like onions, etc. She definitely does humanize the main characters but there was an overall negative vibe in describing the culture. The vast majority of characters she gets into did not enjoy being a part of their community.

There were a few interwoven plotlines, some more interesting than others. I put the book down for a few days a couple of times while reading it, so it certainly didn't suck me in. She did do an okay job getting me to feel for some of the characters which is why I ultimately finished the book.

anon for this

Wed, Oct 03 2018, 7:32 am

I placed the book on hold at my library and read it during yom tov. Like other posters, I kept noticing errors that took me out of the story a bit, like saying that the mikva is pure rainwater. Most of the characters are pretty one-dimensional, and Chani is about the only female character who's both strong and likable, but the intersecting plotlines are interesting.

My daughter read the book and pointed out that none of the men ever seems to open a sefer--not even Boruch, who's supposed to be studying to be a Rabbi. He also doesn't seem to have a chavrusa.

Reading it makes me think Ms. Harris should have done more research beyond what she picked up from her teaching experience and friends. Also I hope she liked her students better than she seems to have liked most of the women in this book.

PinkFridge

Tue, Oct 09 2018, 7:53 pm

So I started the book and here are my thoughts:
- Does Rabbi Silberman teach him and the Rebbetzin her? Why is she 44ish and he's old with cataracts?
- Why was a 19 y.o. from a presumably normal family dating a widower?
- To anyone who finished the book: Are there any characters who are portrayed positively who don't have secret plans to broaden their horizons and break out of the mold?
- Surprised the Rebbetzin had to get rid of her winkle pickers. Wiki makes them sound like cockroach killers.
- Do I really want to spend time finishing this book?

1091

Mon, Oct 22 2018, 8:07 am

PinkFridge wrote:

Just saying that’s me. I was 40 with cataracts.

In any event I took the book out based on this discussion and I’m actually enjoying it. When you put aside the halachic inaccuracies and read it like a description of another culture, I found the characters likeable if not a bit stereotypical. (I can see my mil in Mrs Levy).

Last edited by 1091 on Mon, Oct 22 2018, 9:06 am; edited 1 time in total

PinkFridge

Mon, Oct 22 2018, 8:34 am

1091 wrote:

Yes, I know younger people with cataracts myself, but you would think if that's the case it would have been developed differently. My first impression of him was, he was old and out of it: the cataracts just added to the picture.

1091

Mon, Oct 22 2018, 9:05 am

PinkFridge wrote:

Well, my husband did call me old when the dr told me I needed surgery Very Happy

All in good fun, ladies, he's an amazing man.