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Attending First cousins wedding



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amother
Plum


 

Post Wed, Oct 10 2018, 3:20 pm
When attending first cousin's wedding, for how long is it acceptable to stay?
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lfab




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Oct 10 2018, 3:26 pm
However long you can. I've had times where I could only stay a little over an hour. The important thing is that you go, if you can, si they see you made an effort to share in their simcha.
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amother
Amethyst


 

Post Wed, Oct 10 2018, 4:14 pm
When I go to family chasunas I stay till the end since they usually involve major traveling
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thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Oct 10 2018, 4:18 pm
I stay for most of the wedding. But not for the Mitzvah tantz if there is one . Most babysitters have a deadline of when you need to be back
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Sebastian




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Oct 10 2018, 4:18 pm
depends how close you are. Some I would stay beginning to end and others I would stay for an hour and leave.
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mommyhood




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Oct 10 2018, 4:32 pm
I have a smallish family so cousins weddings are infrequent. We generally get there for the chuppah and stay until the second dance. If I had weddings more often the amount of time I spent there would likely be less.
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tigerwife




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Oct 10 2018, 6:07 pm
It vastly depends on your relationship with these first cousins. I have attended some weddings from beginning to end and skipped others completely.
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amother
Khaki


 

Post Wed, Oct 10 2018, 6:13 pm
Yest my hub cousin married off his son locally. my hub went to say Mazel Tov, when he returned I went for an hour. Need to rotate no babysitter. Today my hub 2nd cousin making chasuna half hour away he is going I am not. By first cousins wedding, that means that your aunt & uncle are marrying off a child, That's pretty close in family relationship so it is expected that you stay for the wedding if you are able to.
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amother
Khaki


 

Post Wed, Oct 10 2018, 6:23 pm
I get so many invitations, it's impossible to attend all. Just this week, I missed a wedding where my classmate married off a child in Monsey. I missed engagement party of my classmate child one in Boro Park, one in Lakewood. I try to attend to weddings that are local where I live, then I can rotate with my hub or go for a little while. When I need to travel for long time I only go if its someone I feel really close to.
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flowerpower




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Oct 10 2018, 6:34 pm
Your first cousin is marrying off or your first cousin is getting married?
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thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Oct 10 2018, 6:35 pm
amother wrote:
I get so many invitations, it's impossible to attend all. Just this week, I missed a wedding where my classmate married off a child in Monsey. I missed engagement party of my classmate child one in Boro Park, one in Lakewood. I try to attend to weddings that are local where I live, then I can rotate with my hub or go for a little while. When I need to travel for long time I only go if its someone I feel really close to.
A first cousin and a classmates child is a bit different.
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imasoftov




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 11 2018, 1:29 am
If you're related to both sides or related to one side in more way, do you stay for the longer of the two times or do you add them?
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chanchy123




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 11 2018, 1:42 am
imasoftov wrote:
If you're related to both sides or related to one side in more way, do you stay for the longer of the two times or do you add them?
How often does that happen that you are at a wedding where you are related to both sides?
I've never been to a wedding like that.
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amother
Maroon


 

Post Thu, Oct 11 2018, 1:53 am
In have one Jewish first cousin. She married out, I did not attend. I have two non Jewish first cousins. I went to one wedding, they ordered is a tray of kosher sandwiches. The other non Jewish cousin is estranged from the whole family.

I am BT and I really don't understand the point of having weddings and all the organization and everything and then people consider it such a tirche to attend.

You have big beautiful Jewish families and simchas. I genuinely don't understand why you don't just enjoy them.

Not seeking to bash, merely to understand the mentality.
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imasoftov




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 11 2018, 2:25 am
chanchy123 wrote:
How often does that happen that you are at a wedding where you are related to both sides?
I've never been to a wedding like that.

Me either, but there is a story like that in my family from before I was born. Someone once drew a family tree explaining how the couple was related, it wasn't closely.
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amother
Seagreen


 

Post Thu, Oct 11 2018, 5:50 am
imasoftov wrote:
If you're related to both sides or related to one side in more way, do you stay for the longer of the two times or do you add them?

Happens to me pretty often. Between my father's and mother's large families and my husbands two huge families,I've had weddings where I was related to both sides. We live in the same community or belong to the same chasidus so it not so uncommon
I'll usually stay for the appropriate time for the closer related family.
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