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Forum
-> Working Women
seeker
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 Mon, Oct 15 2018, 3:17 pm
| amother wrote: | Tone matters. Context matters.
"just" here is annoying - but its the writers attempt to soften the message. You don't want to appear to be a jerk either, or critical.
Ex: Hey Programmer - I came across the following bug when I was using your software - Not sure if its on your list for beta 3 improvements yet. Just FYI. (would be what I would send if my job wasn't to review the programmers work. otherwise - she or he would get a list of review notes).
and regarding the paperwork - if its something we talked about on the phone already... the email would go: Hi person - as per our conversation last week, you agreed to send over the paperwork. What is your expected timeline?
I would be very flustered by such direct emails - from men or women. |
"Hi person, please let me know when to expect the paperwork we discussed. Thanks, me"
Not wishy-washy but not aggressive either. I think.
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FranticFrummie
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Tue, Oct 16 2018, 9:48 am
Like Fox, I switch codes. I had to learn that professional emails should not be written in the casual tone that you would use for a real life conversation.
I do use softening phrases in real life, because some people are sensitive. A spoon full of sugar gets the medicine down, flies with honey, that sort of thing.
Women are not men, and we shouldn't have to act like men in order to be taken seriously. Sometimes, by being soft, it is more likely that we'll get our way!
I think that "just" can have some useful applications, if used very carefully and rarely. "This situation is just one part of a much bigger picture." Could I take it out and still get the point across? Sure, but that's my style of communication. I don't see how it would significantly weaken my positions.
But that's just me. 
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