picking a girl's name

amother

Pumpkin

Wed, Oct 17 2018, 9:58 am

I just had my third girl b"H and I need to pick a name. The problem is I really like my first two girls names, especially my second so it's a hard act to follow Wink

I liked the fact that the girls can use their Jewish first names legally without people having a hard time pronouncing the name.
We b"H thought of a name that fits that criteria but I have a few hesitations.

1. I named the first two with my dh getting a choice between names but they are both named after my side of the family. I gave him a choice of names for this one as well since he can't be bothered sifting through names, rather I give him a name and he'll say if he likes it or not and he picked two names to put together with one being a relative of mine's name who was a very righteous lady. My MIL always says, she named her children now it's my turn but I don't know I still feel a little guilty that all three will be named after my side even though it's irrational.

2. my other girls names have beautiful meanings when translated in to English with their first and middle name going together in the translation. this name has a beautiful meaning to the one not named after someone but not to the one named after someone and the names don't go together in translation.

3. I'm not sure if I feel like the name "fits" the baby. I thought a different name "fit" better but my dh didn't like it so much. it wouldn't be named after anyone and the names would go together.

4. the first name isn't so common in the circles I'm currently in so I sort of have associations with it being from a different "community" even though I do like it and it's meaning.

Can anyone relate? am I waaay overthinking this Wink

as I said at the beginning I just really like my other girls names sigh.

amother

Slateblue

Wed, Oct 17 2018, 10:10 am

Does your husband have any name he would want to give after/for a relative? Why shouldn't he have a chance to get a name he wants, he is also the parent! Don't think its fair that you get all the names. In my circles it's usually on rotation every other child/ to every other parent/side.

amother

Pumpkin

Wed, Oct 17 2018, 10:17 am

thought I made it clear that he has no interest.
"I gave him a choice of names for this one as well since he can't be bothered sifting through names, rather I give him a name and he'll say if he likes it or not"
I've asked him what name he wanted and he won't give me any names. He'll just tell me which of the names I've picked he likes better. I picked them based on what I thought he would like- like he doesn't like yiddish names so I didn't pick any.

Well, he does have a name he wants but it's gibberish and the whole world will be in agreement that I'm a terrible mother if I allowed him to name our child that Wink

think something like munchkin Wink

dancingqueen

Wed, Oct 17 2018, 10:30 am

Do you have geni or ancestry.com? I always look on there while pg to help pick family names I like.

But if you feel like a name doesn’t fit your baby go with your gut. Mothers intuition and all that.

amother

Pumpkin

Wed, Oct 17 2018, 10:32 am

is there a reason why you want to do a family name? I know people feel that way but trying to understand why?

Ruchel

Wed, Oct 17 2018, 10:57 am

LOL because Jews do that, and family is pretty important, and we uphold traditions? That said why can't you pick a name and he picks one

amother

Pink

Wed, Oct 17 2018, 11:02 am

Totally relate! I just named my 3rd girl too and had similar thoughts. So many things to consider! Good luck!
We ended up picking one on shabbos morning right before my husband left to shul to name her and were still discussing it as he walked out of the house and down the path ;-)

amother

Pumpkin

Wed, Oct 17 2018, 11:55 am

last amother- curious what name you ended up picking?

amother

Cyan

Wed, Oct 17 2018, 12:42 pm

amother wrote:

is there a reason why you want to do a family name? I know people feel that way but trying to understand why?

There is a line of thinking that there's a positive influence from the neshama of the person a child is named after on the neshama of that child. That's why when people have to name after a relative who was known not to be a good person they might have someone else in mind when they give the name. Like when they're naming after Great Grandpa Meyer Lansky they might have in mind Rav Meyer Shapiro.
I'm not saying OP must do a family name but if you're asking why she'd consider it, if there was someone she felt connected to and she likes the name that might be a good reason.

Hashem_Yaazor

Wed, Oct 17 2018, 1:04 pm

Tova, Rena, Ahuva, Malka, Yaffa, Atara, Liba (or is that too Yiddish?), Shira (unless you hold by R' Kanievsky) -- any of these names suit your criteria and go well with the second name?

amother

Pink

Wed, Oct 17 2018, 2:01 pm

Amother pumpkin - we ended up picking the name we had originally thought of during pregnancy but thought didn’t ‘fit’ her once she was born. It is growing on us though. I think any name will grow to fit the person as long as you don’t dislike the name!
Hope that helps..

amother

Pumpkin

Wed, Oct 17 2018, 2:37 pm

so I'm op and I'm the one who asked about the reason behind naming after a family member. thank you for explaining Smile

amother

Pumpkin

Thu, Oct 18 2018, 6:06 am

op here picked the name we were thinking of and named the baby today. My dh actually asked me if it was because it was his turn to name so no he doesn't feel shortchanged Smile

dankbar

Thu, Oct 18 2018, 7:27 am

Mazel tov! Lots of nachas! What's your babies name?

Kiwi13

Thu, Oct 18 2018, 8:09 am

mazal tov!!