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How do ppl have an extra"" 20k or more to make weddings?
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amother
Papaya


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 12:12 pm
I am working hard in my job. I hate it but need money for bills. I'm seeing others who are quitting bec they say its too hard to work and have kids ....but how do these ppl with low paying jobs like secretaries, teachers...pay for big simchas like weddings. I'm wondering bec I want to figure out how I will have the money for my kids weddings too. Even an extra 15k is a struggle so how do others do it? (I'm not talking about owners of nursing homes or lawyers drs...)
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amother
Peach


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 12:14 pm
We are putting away 5k a year into an insurance plan which we plan on cashing out to marry off a few children.

You ask how people do it? Who says people do it? Many need to beg, borrow, have others fundraise on their behalf in order to marry off their children.
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amother
Red


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 12:36 pm
You don't have to make a fancy wedding!! I got married a 3 years ago in beis faiga. Around 6500 for the girls side, 3500 for the boys (excluding alcohol and bouquet). It was a beautiful wedding, we had over 400 guests, I didn't feel deprived of anything, and my parents didnt have to go into crazy debt They did have to borrow a little because when you add in everything else it comes out to a lot more (shaitels, gowns, gifts for my husband, etc.) But everyone has that stuff on top of the base wedding cost whether its 70k or 10k...Id rather the 10k thank you very much.
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amother
Papaya


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 12:48 pm
amother wrote:
You don't have to make a fancy wedding!! I got married a 3 years ago in beis faiga. Around 6500 for the girls side, 3500 for the boys (excluding alcohol and bouquet). It was a beautiful wedding, we had over 400 guests, I didn't feel deprived of anything, and my parents didnt have to go into crazy debt They did have to borrow a little because when you add in everything else it comes out to a lot more (shaitels, gowns, gifts for my husband, etc.) But everyone has that stuff on top of the base wedding cost whether its 70k or 10k...Id rather the 10k thank you very much.


Thanks for sharing this. I'm fine making a simpler wedding, but do u know of this cheaper price u quoted for somewhere in ny? I'm not near Lakewood at all.
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amother
Maroon


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 12:55 pm
We put some money into savings but it won't be enough for multiple weddings. We plan on taking out a home equity loan or refinancing. We bought our home relatively young so by the time we are making weddings we should have enough equity for one of those options.
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amother
Red


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 12:56 pm
amother wrote:
Thanks for sharing this. I'm fine making a simpler wedding, but do u know of this cheaper price u quoted for somewhere in ny? I'm not near Lakewood at all.


Sorry I don't know ny halls at all! Buf all beis faiga weddings afaik are packages. Maybe call around and see which halls offer an option like that?

We're actually from OOT but it was much easier to make it in Lakewood (price and family and friends are mostly all from the tristate area). Is monsey any better for you? I may be wrong but I think there is a hall there that is also pretty cheap.
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amother
Maroon


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 12:58 pm
amother wrote:
Thanks for sharing this. I'm fine making a simpler wedding, but do u know of this cheaper price u quoted for somewhere in ny? I'm not near Lakewood at all.

And to answer this, no I don't think there is anywhere as cheap as Bais Faiga for a big wedding. That's why you find Brooklyn and Monsey families making weddings in Lakewood even though neither side lives there.
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thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:00 pm
My former coworker took out a home equity line of credit to marry off all her kids. Then she took part of her property about 10 years ago , and sold it to a builder that built multi family buildings on it. That way she was able to pay up that line of credit. Her first grandchild just got married.
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amother
Ivory


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:04 pm
as a different poster said people make the wedding in lakewood even if they don't live there because of the cost. I think refinancing the house for a wedding is pretty common. Some people get help from either tzedakah or family. Don't assume that everyone just has that type of money lying around. Of course some people also put money away over the years for the wedding or get an inheritance or something.
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amother
Fuchsia


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:05 pm
TAKANA halls are cheapest way to make weddings. Part of TAKANA is no live flowers only synthetic. No full band only one man band or dj system. Some have no photographer only eye system from hall taking photos. No videos. Rest of stuff for wedding like singers, musician, photographer is usually a package deal which hall offers so no choice who you want to use. In our circles wedding costs are split between both sides. Also guest lists are limited by TAKANA halls. 60 couples per side. Also timing that it should end early so save on overtime. Gifts/furnishings/ housewares/linen are all bought by a chasuna mall so pay one price for everything together. Cheaper & limited options & to save on money & time. By chassidish in Brooklyn, even with these measures, boys side is still at least $60,000 from beg of engagement till marriage. Besides for wedding night all gifts, trousseau, & setting up house.....some people even split half & half every little piece of houseware for new chosen kallah apt.

P.S. this is a response for wedding cost in Brooklyn cheapest. Also if you want to save up....
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Mommyg8




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:12 pm
amother wrote:
You don't have to make a fancy wedding!! I got married a 3 years ago in beis faiga. Around 6500 for the girls side, 3500 for the boys (excluding alcohol and bouquet). It was a beautiful wedding, we had over 400 guests, I didn't feel deprived of anything, and my parents didnt have to go into crazy debt They did have to borrow a little because when you add in everything else it comes out to a lot more (shaitels, gowns, gifts for my husband, etc.) But everyone has that stuff on top of the base wedding cost whether its 70k or 10k...Id rather the 10k thank you very much.


Even if you make the wedding in bais fayga, when you add up all the chasunah related expenses it's usually way over twenty thousand dollars. And that's the boys side.

Most women I know go back to work or take more hours as their kids reach chasunah age. That's MY experience.
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mom39




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:13 pm
If you can get tiferes rifka or mordechai (same caterer) on takana nights, those are the cheapest but they are booked well in advance.
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amother
Papaya


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:21 pm
thunderstorm wrote:
My former coworker took out a home equity line of credit to marry off all her kids. Then she took part of her property about 10 years ago , and sold it to a builder that built multi family buildings on it. That way she was able to pay up that line of credit. Her first grandchild just got married.


Thanks for sharing. This only works if u own a home. I know of many who dont own. I dont own a home.
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amother
Papaya


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:23 pm
amother wrote:
TAKANA halls are cheapest way to make weddings. Part of TAKANA is no live flowers only synthetic. No full band only one man band or dj system. Some have no photographer only eye system from hall taking photos. No videos. Rest of stuff for wedding like singers, musician, photographer is usually a package deal which hall offers so no choice who you want to use. In our circles wedding costs are split between both sides. Also guest lists are limited by TAKANA halls. 60 couples per side. Also timing that it should end early so save on overtime. Gifts/furnishings/ housewares/linen are all bought by a chasuna mall so pay one price for everything together. Cheaper & limited options & to save on money & time. By chassidish in Brooklyn, even with these measures, boys side is still at least $60,000 from beg of engagement till marriage. Besides for wedding night all gifts, trousseau, & setting up house.....some people even split half & half every little piece of houseware for new chosen kallah apt.

P.S. this is a response for wedding cost in Brooklyn cheapest. Also if you want to save up....


I'm fine doing a takana wedding but I think torah v yira is a takana hall?? Its usually booked in advance.

What other halls in Brooklyn are takana halls??
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rgr




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:24 pm
Vishnitz in boro park is cheaper than ateres mordechai/rivka.
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amother
Papaya


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:26 pm
mom39 wrote:
If you can get hi tiferes rifka or mordechai (same caterer) on takana nights, those are the cheapest but they are booked well in advance.


Thanks for posting.
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amother
Papaya


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:27 pm
Thanks everyone for posting with information.
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amother
Lilac


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:33 pm
amother wrote:
You don't have to make a fancy wedding!! I got married a 3 years ago in beis faiga. Around 6500 for the girls side, 3500 for the boys (excluding alcohol and bouquet). It was a beautiful wedding, we had over 400 guests, I didn't feel deprived of anything, and my parents didnt have to go into crazy debt They did have to borrow a little because when you add in everything else it comes out to a lot more (shaitels, gowns, gifts for my husband, etc.) But everyone has that stuff on top of the base wedding cost whether its 70k or 10k...Id rather the 10k thank you very much.
why did your dh side spend less than half of your side?
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amother
Lilac


 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:35 pm
amother wrote:
TAKANA halls are cheapest way to make weddings. Part of TAKANA is no live flowers only synthetic. No full band only one man band or dj system. Some have no photographer only eye system from hall taking photos. No videos. Rest of stuff for wedding like singers, musician, photographer is usually a package deal which hall offers so no choice who you want to use. In our circles wedding costs are split between both sides. Also guest lists are limited by TAKANA halls. 60 couples per side. Also timing that it should end early so save on overtime. Gifts/furnishings/ housewares/linen are all bought by a chasuna mall so pay one price for everything together. Cheaper & limited options & to save on money & time. By chassidish in Brooklyn, even with these measures, boys side is still at least $60,000 from beg of engagement till marriage. Besides for wedding night all gifts, trousseau, & setting up house.....some people even split half & half every little piece of houseware for new chosen kallah apt.

P.S. this is a response for wedding cost in Brooklyn cheapest. Also if you want to save up....
Where are you getting $60,000 from per side? What are you spending 120,000 on especially since you mentioned that includes takana hall?
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Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Oct 18 2018, 1:50 pm
Saving from birth, putting even 5 dollars a month.
Gifts etc from family
They don't - kid works for his wedding
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