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-> Parenting our children
-> Our Challenging Children (gifted, ADHD, sensitive, defiant)
amother
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Tue, Nov 06 2018, 9:13 am
My son is in 8th grade. For a few years now I've had niggling concerns that he has ADHD.
The reason I've not evaluated thus far is that his performance is above average for the most part, his grades are good, his behavior in school is good. His teachers say he is a polite boy (save for one, but I'll put that as a chemistry thing).
But I'm seeing at home how he tends to not follow instructions to the end, his room is disorganized, he can have impulsive physical reactions to provocations from his younger sibling. He also has a streak of inflexibility, which has b"H improved.
His teachers have expressed that although he is doing okay at school, he does show signs of distractibility during gemara class. In sixth grade his teacher felt he was one step behind the class (but he's smart so he pulled through anyway).
Last year (7th grade) we arranged for a someone to learn with him regularly, and he has since pulled up from the high eighties to the high nineties. I've theorized that he may be spacing out at intervals during class, thus missing important building blocks in the gemara. When he was younger he could afford to space out and still pull off amazing grades, but that doesn't work with gemara.
I'm sure I myself have ADHD, and I was similar in school - very smart, but not performing to my potential, yet still pulling through well enough to not cause alarm to anyone. I look back at my school years with regret that I always felt one step behind with schoolwork, smart enough but not consistent in my performance.
I want to help my son, I don't want him to be hindered by this, especially with Mesivta next year.
I'm a bit stuck with the evaluation process - is it something I should do right before entering mesivta or is that throwing in a monkey's wrench to the application process? Should I wait until he is settle in mesivta next year? (In conversations with his teachers, they regard him has a candidate for good yeshivas but not nessecarily the most demanding and intense places out there).
If I evaluate , who should I take him to, who has a good reputation professionally, and familiarity with the yeshivish school system? (Tristate area)
Also, he has had some ticks on and off over the last year and a half. I'm hesitant to rock the boat in that area, so not crazy about medications.
In which case, should I even bother to spend all that time and money to evaluate? Or should I just assume he has a less dramatic form of ADHD and try to work with him to develop strategies to help him to be more organized? (easier said than done...)
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