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Forum -> Children's Health -> Toilet Training
An eight year old is still not toilet trained at night
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amother
Blue


 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 2:20 pm
My grandson is 8 years old and is still in diapers at night.
My daughter who is a single mum has not even taken him to the doctor because she is very laid back about it and feels he is not yet ready to be dry at night. She has tried waking him up to go to toilet before she goes to bed but that didn't help.
I think my grandson is very self conscious and upset about this. The home circumstances are difficult.
I really want to help him (and my daughter).
I would appreciate any ideas.
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amother
Seagreen


 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 2:22 pm
It's well within the range of normal, FWIW. My daughter wasn't night trained until 9.5.
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rachelmom1




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 2:26 pm
We purchased an alarm sold on Amazon that did the trick rather quickly.
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mha3484




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 2:30 pm
I second the alarm it works great
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amother
Slateblue


 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 2:32 pm
Without being alarmist I would encourage her to ask her pediatrician. Just in terms of maximizing the best situation for the child.
I can't imagine it would be pleasant for the child and when he wants to sleep out or go to overnight camp etc he will need this solved. I would imagine it could affect a child's self image as he is aware that most if not all of his friends don't have this issue and could feel embarrassed. He may feel its "babyish".
hugs and hatzlocha
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amother
Jetblack


 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 2:33 pm
My 10 year old son and 9 year old daughter are not night trained. I have a bunch of other kids who are. So it’s not a lack of effort.

The 10 year old had sleep anemia and tonsils removed but it didn’t help the bed wetting. He sees an ent who wants to send us to a urologists. My pediatrician is strongly against that and meds. He feels it will pass on its own and if it doesn’t we can still address later - but he is still too young for medical intervention.
We did try the alarm at one point but it didn’t work - but that could’ve been because of the sleep issues.
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 2:34 pm
Amother seagreen, because your DD wet till 9.5, it doesn't make it normal.
Theres a special alarm that wakes the kid in the night to go to the bathroom. Or his mom should wake him a couple of times a night. He should eliminate drinking from at least 2 hours before bedtime. If it happens every night, he may need to see a doctor.
You said his home situation is hard, it might very well be happening because of anxiety and stress.
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amother
Lawngreen


 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 2:37 pm
My ds was wearing pull ups at night until shortly before his 10th birthday, when he suddenly started being dry on his own.
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thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 2:37 pm
My 8 yr old DS was just at the doctor and discussed the fact that he still wets his bed every night. He gave us a prescription for the alarm and said to try it first before trying medication which only works as a bandaid.
FYI my oldest son only stopped wetting his bed when he was 14.5 and 6 ft tall.
Two of my brothers wet until Bar Mitzvah and my father wet until age 12.
It's very hereditary and common in boys.
The pediatrician told me years ago that between age 8 and age 9 is when they start addressing it because it's considered very normal under that age.
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amother
Lime


 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 2:38 pm
Encourage her to check with the pediatrician to rule out any problems. If your grandson wants to try an alarm, and it should be his decision when to try an intervention, it may require some documents from the doctor to get insurance coverage. We found that a Malem alarm was very helpful for a girl that age, but it is essential that both the child and adult helper be on board.
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oneofakind




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 2:57 pm
Alarm was great for daughter age 7.
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cnc




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 3:40 pm
A urologist is the first stop. They can recommend exercise, medication, or surgery based on what the issue is. There is no way to know what the issue is without a consultation/exam.
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m2m




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 4:31 pm
My dd is 5 and isn't dry at night, is she too young for the alarm?
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oneofakind




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 4:40 pm
My son was delayed in many areas and trained in 2 days at age 4 for day and self trained at night at 7. I think you can try with a regular kid at 5. Stress and anxiety definitely contributes to the problem.
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chaya35




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 4:53 pm
The alarm worked great when my son was seven.
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amother
Jetblack


 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 5:22 pm
oneofakind wrote:
My son was delayed in many areas and trained in 2 days at age 4 for day and self trained at night at 7. I think you can try with a regular kid at 5. Stress and anxiety definitely contributes to the problem.


It also depend on how certain parts of the body mature.
Some of my kids night trained at 3 and some at 10 are not.
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amother
Burlywood


 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 6:24 pm
amother wrote:
Encourage her to check with the pediatrician to rule out any problems. If your grandson wants to try an alarm, and it should be his decision when to try an intervention, it may require some documents from the doctor to get insurance coverage. We found that a Malem alarm was very helpful for a girl that age, but it is essential that both the child and adult helper be on board.


Im not op but can u pls tell me which exact malem alarm u bought and how does it work to help the problem?? Is it that the alarm wakes the child up to go to make?? So then the child gets used to getting up at night and eventually gets up on his own??
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amother
Lime


 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 7:08 pm
amother wrote:
Im not op but can u pls tell me which exact malem alarm u bought and how does it work to help the problem?? Is it that the alarm wakes the child up to go to make?? So then the child gets used to getting up at night and eventually gets up on his own??


It was over ten years ago, so the models are not exactly the same, but it was similar to this: https://smile.amazon.com/dp/B0.....B53FH

Yes, it wakes up the child to go make. A sensor clips to the underpants and detects the very first drop of urine before the full flow starts and the bladder still feels full. It triggers a loud alarm to wake the child, training the child to wake up for a full bladder. These children tend to be sound sleepers, so the alarm is very loud. It helps for a parent to get up also and make sure the child awakens, and to help with the equipment if necessary. I slept in my daughter's room the first night or two; after that she was independent. The whole process took about a week, but experiences vary widely.

We started when my child was eight. Her doctor first recommended the method a year or so earlier, and our insurance coverage started at age seven. We waited until she was personally motivated, and coincidentally showed the earliest signs of readiness (a very rare dry night). We also waited until after the holidays so she could have a consistent experience from one night to the next.

Yes, it's expensive, but insurance might help as part of your durable medical equipment (DME) benefit. Don't buy anything until you find out the procedure, and use a vendor who participates in your plan. We accidentally used an out-of-network vendor and didn't get anything. We eventually sold our alarm on Craigslist and recouped some of the cost.
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amother
Wheat


 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 11:24 pm
After being potty trained, I wet the bed regularly until I was 10 yrs old. My pediatrician put me on a nose spray that was supposed to help (it worked). Before that I had an alarm in the crotch of my underwear that went off when it got wet. That didn't work, I just slept through the noise. My mom also would wake me up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night before she went to bed (so around 10:30/11pm). Eventually I grew out of it but it took a looooong time and a lot of trial and error.
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amother
Puce


 

Post Tue, Nov 06 2018, 11:56 pm
Wow I'm shocked this is more common than I thought! My niece is 8 and also still wears a diaper at night.. I always thought it's because there are problems on the family, she's very sensitive and that might be her "rebellion".
She's ashamed of the diaper but she prefers it to a wet bed. Wish I could help her.. but the alarm.. isn't that really bad for the kids? They must be extremely exhausted the next morning?
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