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Forum -> Household Management -> Finances
Ezer Lemuzen Keren Ezer UJO. Was it really confidential?



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amother
Firebrick


 

Post Thu, Nov 08 2018, 4:15 am
Hi. What was your experience with Ezer Lemuzen? And Karen Ezer? And UJO for Heap etc? Which ones kept really confidential and did not A) disclose to friends B) did not go behind your back go tell your family to donate. My life has now 2 major issues that caused me to be depleted of money. I dont want it be disclosed.
(Already tried: Rabbi and exposed the issue, bikur cholim and exposed my issie, family without disclosing the personal issue - total I received 1000 in very short term loans, I made a chesed page on the chesed fund but my friends did not get the hint that its for myself. They think it's for someone else )
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amother
Seashell


 

Post Thu, Nov 08 2018, 8:10 am
RCCS also went behind my back and DEMANDED of my family to give.

I had a similar experience with another helping agency. They called a family member behind my back.

Ugh.
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chanee




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Nov 08 2018, 8:30 am
Heap is considered standard so doubt you'll go public
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amother
Smokey


 

Post Thu, Nov 08 2018, 9:32 am
So you are saying that big name organizations may help you but then made calls demanding that family pay? Um if my family could pay I would assume they would.
How do they get your family's numbers?
Do they help you if you don't give them the numbers?
Do they help even if your family can't help?
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amother
Smokey


 

Post Thu, Nov 08 2018, 9:35 am
So HEAP is a government program. You can apply directly through them and no one else would know. The government will know anyways so why add extra people that you can't seem to trust into the mix?
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amother
Firebrick


 

Post Thu, Nov 08 2018, 3:23 pm
I'm thinking I'm not gonna care if they go to my family. I'm doing so tight, so challenging.
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amother
Firebrick


 

Post Thu, Nov 08 2018, 3:51 pm
amother wrote:
RCCS also went behind my back and DEMANDED of my family to give.

I had a similar experience with another helping agency. They called a family member behind my back.

Ugh.


Hugs. Reading this I'm sure is was not too pleasant for you.
So you see my concern
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amother
Smokey


 

Post Fri, Nov 09 2018, 11:25 am
I am so confused. Will these organizations help if you don't have family to "pay them back?" What if you refuse to say who your family is?
Why do they do this? It's hard enough to ask for help... I personally have not used the organizations mentioned here but if one day I need it CV I don't want to end up in such a predicament.

One day when I have money to give to tzeddakah I wouldn't want to support such awful practices...
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amother
Cerise


 

Post Fri, Nov 09 2018, 11:48 am
As one who's gone through a lot, I can say the very only one that didn't slip up in any way was a professional therapist. The rest, which includes: dayan, rabbi, parents, family counselor (who promised multiple times confidentiality), friends - you name it - all of them told others!

OP, I wish you better then my experience. I mean, there ARE trustable people out there. I hope you find them.
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amother
Tan


 

Post Fri, Nov 09 2018, 11:54 am
how can an organization demand your family pays- unless you know the people in charge how do they know who your family members are, I don't get it?
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amother
Firebrick


 

Post Fri, Nov 09 2018, 12:01 pm
amother wrote:
As one who's gone through a lot, I can say the very only one that didn't slip up in any way was a professional therapist. The rest, which includes: dayan, rabbi, parents, family counselor (who promised multiple times confidentiality), friends - you name it - all of them told others!

OP, I wish you better then my experience. I mean, there ARE trustable people out there. I hope you find them.


OmG I guess they are not under HIPAA laws and therapist is the only one that has to watch HiPAA. My situation is.mental health which has no proper funding/ chesed organization. There is no way I can expose in a community that uses this information to shun the patient and destroy every shiduch of all siblings of the patient. It has to stay a locked secret. My friend opened a chesed funding page. Help trickles from there a little sometimes. Her chesed page is better than mine because she can.openly say that its for a friend. Maybe there should be a law that medical chesed organizations also have to watch HIPAA? Or will that diminish funding? Its so wonderfull our mi keamcha ysrael but we patients dont want to be exposed. And dont they "promise" us to keep confidential?
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crust




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Nov 09 2018, 3:11 pm
amother wrote:
As one who's gone through a lot, I can say the very only one that didn't slip up in any way was a professional therapist. The rest, which includes: dayan, rabbi, parents, family counselor (who promised multiple times confidentiality), friends - you name it - all of them told others!

OP, I wish you better then my experience. I mean, there ARE trustable people out there. I hope you find them.



I am sorry for your experience. I know a lot of people that suffered like this. It's a sad reality; people reach out for help and [sometimes] they get insult on top of the injury.

I have given this phenomena lots of thought and I here's my take on it;

People that run organizations, especially the ones that dish out huge amounts of money, are [usually] great salesmen or fundraisers. They [usually] dont have these soft sensitive personalities needed to delicately handle their clientele.

Therefore when you reach out for help make sure that;

A. You are ready to be exposed. Expect that the most amount of people are going to know and pray for the least. Dont think it'll be kept private. Ever.

B. If you are the one in need of the help find yourself someone stronger than you to communicate with the org.
Very often unpleasant situations could've been avoided had there been an advocate or a mediator between the weak or delicate pateint.

C. Remember that we need these people to have these personalaties because people that are more emotionally developed or softer will not found or fundraise for these orgs. They run the org becaise they have what it takes!

So, if you're not handled with the care you feel you deserve, dont take it personal because any insensitive comment is not about you or your request. Its their pushy/strong personality.



Re the bolded; Are you sure your therapist's medical biller is not someone from your community? Sorry to burst your bubble...
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amother
Smokey


 

Post Sat, Nov 10 2018, 10:25 pm
crust wrote:
I am sorry for your experience. I know a lot of people that suffered like this. It's a sad reality; people reach out for help and [sometimes] they get insult on top of the injury.

I have given this phenomena lots of thought and I here's my take on it;

People that run organizations, especially the ones that dish out huge amounts of money, are [usually] great salesmen or fundraisers. They [usually] dont have these soft sensitive personalities needed to delicately handle their clientele.

Therefore when you reach out for help make sure that;

A. You are ready to be exposed. Expect that the most amount of people are going to know and pray for the least. Dont think it'll be kept private. Ever.

B. If you are the one in need of the help find yourself someone stronger than you to communicate with the org.
Very often unpleasant situations could've been avoided had there been an advocate or a mediator between the weak or delicate pateint.

C. Remember that we need these people to have these personalaties because people that are more emotionally developed or softer will not found or fundraise for these orgs. They run the org becaise they have what it takes!

So, if you're not handled with the care you feel you deserve, dont take it personal because any insensitive comment is not about you or your request. Its their pushy/strong personality.



Re the bolded; Are you sure your therapist's medical biller is not someone from your community? Sorry to burst your bubble...


But the biller is also required to follow HIPAA..
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amother
Vermilion


 

Post Sat, Nov 10 2018, 10:47 pm
Heap is something many people get so its normal & nothing to be embarrased of. The person who does the heap at CJC is a non Jewish employee from the govt.
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crust




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Nov 10 2018, 10:49 pm
amother wrote:
But the biller is also required to follow HIPAA..


Don't get me started about HIPAA but let me just give you a scenario for some food for thought.

Malki Info works in medical billing and her brother is in shiduchim. Her mother is looking for information on a girl from the Stolzberg family.

The Stolzberg family has a child that has a medical or emotional issue that if Mrs. Info hears about it she will less likely consider the shidduch.

Malki happens to be the medical biller for the doctor that the Stolzberg family frequents.

Her mother asks her for information. Should she share? What should she do?
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amother
Dodgerblue


 

Post Sat, Nov 10 2018, 10:56 pm
crust wrote:


SNIP

Re the bolded; Are you sure your therapist's medical biller is not someone from your community? Sorry to burst your bubble...


This. I recently found out that when a therapist looks a child in the eye and promises that everything she says will stay between them he/she is lying.
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