Unpopular Opinions

proudmomma

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 6:13 pm

Emotional wrote:

I'm scared to say it, but I'll say it anyway.
Obese people are not beautiful. Stop telling them they are. If they were, there wouldn't be a whole industry out there trying to convince them how gorgeous they would be if they were thin.
Signed,
An obese woman who hates mirrors (and struggles terribly with self-acceptance -in case you couldn't tell!😶😶😉😉😉😉🤐🤐☺)

Beauty is from within.
I know plenty of thin people who are downright nasty & people avoid them like the plague.
I know quite a few obese women who have such beautiful personalities that they're quite attractive.

thunderstorm

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 6:16 pm

tweek wrote:

Sure. Barring any other factors (such as mental health issues or abuse), I believe that parents have an innate wisdom from Hashem who gave them their children, to know how to deal with them.

Bombarding parents and spoon feeding them with exact methods of how to deal with every aspect of parenting gets in the way and causes children to parented in cookie cutter ways. There is also a lot of unnecessary guilt and unrealistic expectations that come from parenting classes that also gets in the way.

If there is a specific issue, parents can and should solicit advice for thosat specific issues and then chose the advice that resonates with them and their child, but the detailed breaking down of one specific way to deal with each little exact issue that comes up doesn't seem right.

I am in complete agreement.

bigsis144

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 6:35 pm

Ravenclaw wrote:

I am scared to admit this, because it’s really really unpopular but... I believe in magic. And that some creatures that we know today as magical myths are based on truth. Mermaids (not the Disney kind though), werewolves, a Phoenix, dwarves, a griffin, unicorns... these are seen in literature of almost ever culture going back thousands of years. There wasn’t internet or widespread pop culture then, so if it had no basis in truth then how did so many of these legends overlap? Also quite a few are mentioned in Torah literature.
But it’s not like I believe in fairies, vampires or zombies... I’m not stupid ; )

Ah, a Ravenclaw like Luna Lovegood! (She was right about many things...)

Ravenclaw

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 6:39 pm

mommy3b2c wrote:

I believe in it too. The Gemara definitely talks about mermaids. I just don’t think they looked like Ariel. I believe there is mention of a unicorn as well. And there definitely was magic.

Thank you! My husband said the mermaids in Gemara caught their prey through singing, but they were ugly- a fish from the waist up and human from the waist down.

PinkFridge

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 6:44 pm

gingertop wrote:

I guess the boring factor is what I like about it. Nice and calm.

Interestingly, I find the trend to have at least one historical serial ongoing in every magazine a copout from good writing. It's like if there is enough research there then the story must be amazing. Sometimes it is. I like history but I wish it was served straight at least half the time.

I don't think it's a cop out at all. Without naming names of the inferior and turgid stuff, I've found that some of the historical fiction is awesome. I don't think just anyone could do what Leah Gebber or E. G. Schwartz have done, even if given all the material. Oh, and The Exiles of Crocodile Island: not just anyone could have written that either.

OutATowner

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 6:58 pm

Ravenclaw wrote:

Thank you! My husband said the mermaids in Gemara caught their prey through singing, but they were ugly- a fish from the waist up and human from the waist down.

Fascinating. Can you ask him where in the gemara? Or a source I can look up?
Eta: not because I doubt you, because I am super interested!

SuperWify

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 7:05 pm

Ravenclaw wrote:

I do too!!

sky

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 7:08 pm

Babies ears should not be pierced. It detracts from their pureness.

Tight leggings on boys are silly.

Little babies in barely there summer clothing are cold when the air conditioning is on.

Inexpensive\ cheap clothing lasts longer then expensive clothing.

Children over 9 should not be matching. Definetly having 5 or more children matching is scary and detracts from individuality. Children should have a say in their clothing and choose to wear a outfit that does not match everyone else.

ra_mom

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 7:15 pm

Ravenclaw wrote:

Mermaids are written about in Torah sources.

Eisav sounds like a red haired werewolf. Tongue Out

Though neither are magical. Wink

Jeanette

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 7:22 pm

tweek wrote:

OMG this is the perfect book for you:

https://www.amazon.com/Bare-Mi.....85320

It's a real book! No joke!

I actually agree with you. Most parenting books and classes make you feel inadequate, like youre doing everything wrong and couldn't possibly figure it out on your own. I really liked "Good Enough Parent" which makes basically this point.

Last edited by Jeanette on Tue, Nov 13 2018, 7:25 pm; edited 2 times in total

ra_mom

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 7:23 pm

OutATowner wrote:

Fascinating. Can you ask him where in the gemara? Or a source I can look up?
Eta: not because I doubt you, because I am super interested!

I don't know if I have the exact source, but I have something saved on my computer (dd loves mermaids). PM during the day if I forget to post back here.
I do remember that Rashi talks about Dolfinin which he describes as half body human and half body fish.

Emotional

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 7:29 pm

Fox wrote:

Well, beauty is a subjective thing. You can find cultures in the world where all kinds of things are considered "beautiful" that would be repellent to us.

The problem is that "body positivity" is a good idea that got taken too far. When it meant "women can be healthy and attractive without looking like photoshopped swimsuit models," it was a good thing.

But, of course, a few people always have to take it too far. So now we have people insisting that Western standards of beauty be changed to accommodate the fact that they'd like to be beautiful but aren't.

Or "fit at any size." When that means, "it's better to be fat and active than fat and sedentary," well, yeah. But taken literally, no. You cannot be morbidly obese and be as healthy as you would at a lower weight.

Of course, the craziest story was the obese activist who stripped to a bikini in Times Square. I'm not going to go searching for the link, but some of you may have seen it. I think she was trying to prove something about her rejection of Western beauty standards. Well, she discovered that there's a significant minority of men who are really into obese women, and quite a few of them made suggestive remarks, propositioned her, and generally behaved like dogs. So then she got upset about being objectified. Rolling Eyes

Anyway, I've fought obesity much of my life, and right now, it's planning to recount ballots until it wins. I keep fighting, but I agree with you, Emotional. It's not beautiful, and it makes me unattractive. Those are simply facts, and they mean I need to work on my personality and try to be more beautiful from the inside out. Though a good handbag doesn't hurt the effort.

Fox, I love the way you verbalize things. You explain my point of view so well, I wonder if you were me in a previous life 🤐

oneofakind

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 7:34 pm

Here goes, get to know me. I'd rather be comfortable and classy than stylish. Earrings on babies are cruel and don't look cute. Pom pom or any hat on an adult that protrudes or hangs down on top looks stupid (reminds me of Santa Claus or the seven dwarfs) If you have a pretty face, you are pretty, regardless of your weight. Children who have an opinion about their clothing are entitled to their opinion and should not match their siblings if they don't want to. If you dress too many kids alike, I think you are asking for an ayin horah although, it may be that people will just think "there by the grace of G-d go I" so take your pick. Also, what do they do with last season's clothing I always wanted to know.
So I said it.

proudmomma

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 7:35 pm

My unpopular opinion is that every Jewish neshama should be accepted into Jewish school. The school has the right to go over their rules with prospective parents and mention the actions they will need to take if they aren't adhered to. But every child deserves a chance!
The elitist attitude of our schools and yeshivos must stop! I truly don't believe that they will get schar for not accepting innocent 3 year olds. Quite the contrary!
I've seen many families hashkofos take a nose dive after putting their children into more modern/ day schools, after being rejected.

tweek

Tue, Nov 13 2018, 7:41 pm

Jeanette wrote:

This looks intriguing! Thanks!