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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Simcha Section
Culturedpearls
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Wed, Nov 21 2018, 5:16 am
Ruchel wrote: | I'm more familiar with 50/50. But again I'm also not familiar with that awful flap thing. |
What’s wrong with flop? We did it once & ended up with a huge flower bill. So now we go 50/50 works out cheaper!!
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PinkFridge
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Wed, Nov 21 2018, 5:34 am
coloredleaves wrote: | In my circle- yeshivish- girls side makes vort. And also decides where it is ( home to shul) and how fancy or not to make it. Growing up more modern- if each side was from a different neighborhood they eachsponsored one in their own area and made it how they wanted. Like there might be one vort in own state and another engagement party if the other side's state |
I don't think this is modern. Sometimes the boy's side just wants to make an open house. Call it a vort. Gezunteheit.
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keym
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Wed, Nov 21 2018, 7:14 am
In my world, the girls side plans and arranges the vort. However if the chassan and kalla are from the same town and therefore the chassan side has lots of guests, they chip in.
If they come from different cities,, then usually when the kalla goes to visit the chassans hometown, the chassan's mother or her friends will make a vort, open house, or shower.
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Ruchel
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Wed, Nov 21 2018, 12:25 pm
I have no interest in handling things I don't know anything about, have no connections with... not to mention people who are not local and just don't know alcohol or the non paying side knows tons of great photographers but you don't. Big nope.
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Culturedpearls
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Wed, Nov 21 2018, 12:52 pm
Ruchel wrote: | I have no interest in handling things I don't know anything about, have no connections with... not to mention people who are not local and just don't know alcohol or the non paying side knows tons of great photographers but you don't. Big nope. |
Are you referring to flop? Because flop doesn’t mean you organise it. It means you pay for it.
Girls side arranges
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dankbar
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Wed, Nov 21 2018, 5:24 pm
By chassidishe boys side usually does arrange stuff like music, flowers, invitations, liquor, badchan. Hall/portions/waiters/ photography gets split 50/50 or some people everything 50/50. By us instead of flops it's all the stuff starting with beis.
Bilder. Blimen. Badchan. Bronfen. Briven.
If chosson side pays for flowers they decide whether to pay for fake flowers or a whole garden. Same with invitation they decide if they do a simple or fancy one. If kallah side has money or want nicer they usually add in
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shanie5
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Thu, Nov 22 2018, 8:20 pm
Culturedpearls wrote: | Are you referring to flop? Because flop doesn’t mean you organise it. It means you pay for it.
Girls side arranges |
When we did FLOP, the one who paid is the one who hired. I would NEVER let someone else hire and decide what I can afford!
Vort was usually paid for by girls side, though I have split the cost too.
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Culturedpearls
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Thu, Nov 22 2018, 8:23 pm
shanie5 wrote: | When we did FLOP, the one who paid is the one who hired. I would NEVER let someone else hire and decide what I can afford!
Vort was usually paid for by girls side, though I have split the cost too. |
If you’re in a different country you can’t choose!
I know someone who was handed a 10k flower bill
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amother
Amethyst
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Thu, Nov 22 2018, 8:58 pm
Why would the girls side pay for the whole vort if they also pay more for the wedding?
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Ruchel
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Fri, Nov 23 2018, 1:16 am
Culturedpearls wrote: | Are you referring to flop? Because flop doesn’t mean you organise it. It means you pay for it.
Girls side arranges |
Then I pay and may hate it, or it may be much too expensive. It's unfair for both sides. Plus the name... worst name for a wedding. But mostly I don't like random. Every couple is different. Do 50/50 or work it out.
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shanie5
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Sat, Nov 24 2018, 5:29 pm
Culturedpearls wrote: | If you’re in a different country you can’t choose!
I know someone who was handed a 10k flower bill |
then I wouldn't agree to FLOP or let them know what I was willing/able to afford. If they spend more, thats on them, not me.
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