Not paying full tuition but have new cars-lavish lifestyle

amother

Babyblue

Tue, Jan 01 2019, 9:54 pm

amother wrote:

They take checks the summer before and charge you a fee if it bounces. Plus won't let you enroll for next year. I can't pull them out because I need to work and DH goes on interviews, networking events, and may have a job IYH at any time. He is well educated and in a field that should earn enough but just can't find anything.

We are stuck and davening he finds a job soon. Our savings is running low. We watch every penny AND pay full tuition.
I will apply for reduction if need be for next year and will prove we haven't done anything extravagant. Check credit card statements, our bills etc. we aren't hiding cash, fancy gifts, or cars under our parents names. It's basic bills only.

And for those who say the heat shouldn't be below 65... Come to my place. No one has frostbite.

Head checks are illegal in my state. You can always put a stop payment on your checks. I can't imagine where you live that you can pay your family's expenses for under $1000. No one should live like this.

I don't think it would hurt you to speak to the school. If you have a record of being full payers, they should be willing to work with you.

amother

Cerise

Tue, Jan 01 2019, 10:01 pm

amother wrote:

Head checks? So what? My kids school also takes head checks with the signed contract. If something comes up mid year they're happy to rip up checks and take new ones. I'm having a hard time understanding if you even reached out to someone to explain the situation- and if not, why not?

imasoftov

Wed, Jan 02 2019, 12:32 pm

flowerpower wrote:

Since when did Pesach become all about going to hotels or to a different Country? This is not what hashem had in mind when he added Pesach to the calendar!

An aside (and not as a comment about tuition, subsidies, luxuries, or hotels), sure that is the point of Pesach. But we weren't supposed to go back to Egypt after it was over. As it says in last week's parasha

וָאֵרֵ֞ד לְהַצִּיל֣וֹ ׀ מִיַּ֣ד מִצְרַ֗יִם וּֽלְהַעֲלֹתוֹ֮ מִן־הָאָ֣רֶץ הַהִוא֒ אֶל־אֶ֤רֶץ טוֹבָה֙ וּרְחָבָ֔ה אֶל־אֶ֛רֶץ זָבַ֥ת חָלָ֖ב וּדְבָ֑שׁ אֶל־מְק֤וֹם הַֽכְּנַעֲנִי֙ וְהַ֣חִתִּ֔י וְהָֽאֱמֹרִי֙ וְהַפְּרִזִּ֔י וְהַחִוִּ֖י וְהַיְבוּסִֽי׃

I have come down to rescue them from the Egyptians and to bring them out of that land to a good and spacious land, a land flowing with milk and honey, the region of the Canaanites, the Hittites, the Amorites, the Perizzites, the Hivites, and the Jebusites.

amother

Silver

Wed, Jan 02 2019, 9:52 pm

imasoftov wrote:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RrMAcUyI_Vg

A shiur on the value of staying home for Pesach! It's in the Torah!

imasoftov

Thu, Jan 03 2019, 3:31 am

questioner wrote:

Doesn't the Torah say that we should all be oleh regel for Pesach? That doesn't require a five star hotel, but does obligate karbanos.
Did imamother bzman hamikdash have long threads about people who don't pay full tuition but bring a cow as a karban instead of a bird?

Well those archives haven't been put online yet (there's a compatability issue with the clay tablet reader), but there's this, from Beitza 20a

ת"ר מעשה בהלל הזקן שהביא עולתו לעזרה לסמוך עליה ביו"ט חברו עליו תלמידי שמאי הזקן אמרו לו מה טיבה של בהמה זו אמר להם נקבה היא ולזבחי שלמים הבאתיה כשכש להם בזנבה והלכו להם

The Sages taught in a baraita: There was an incident involving Hillel the Elder, who brought his burnt-offering to the Temple courtyard in order to place his hands on the animal’s head on a Festival. The students of Shammai the Elder gathered around him and said to him: What is the nature of this animal that you are bringing? Hillel, being humble and meek, did not want to quarrel with them in the Temple and therefore concealed the truth from them for the sake of peace. He said to them: It is a female, and I have brought it as a peace-offering, as burnt-offerings are always male. He swung its tail for them so that they would not be able to properly discern whether the animal was male or female, and they departed.

(the background is that every (man) was obligated to bring an olah and a shlamim each regel. Olot are male, shlamim are female. Beit Shammai said that it was permitted to bring a shalmim on Yom Tov but an olah could only be brought on chol hamoed (or the days following Shavuot) because you eat from a shlamim but an olah isn't eaten, but Beit Hillel permitted both on Yom Tov.)

And from the next amud, for people who think it's rude when I engage in verbal judo here.

שוב מעשה בתלמיד אחד מתלמידי ב"ה שהביא עולתו לעזרה לסמוך עליה מצאו תלמיד אחד מתלמידי ב"ש אמר לו מה זו סמיכה אמר לו מה זו שתיקה שתקו בנזיפה והלך לו

And some time later there was another incident involving a certain disciple from among the disciples of Beit Hillel who brought his burnt-offering to the Temple courtyard in order to place his hands on the animal’s head on a Festival. A student from Beit Shammai found him and said to him: What is this placing of hands? (Beit Shammai said not to do this on Yom Tov) He said to him: What is this silence? He silenced him with a rebuke, and Beit Shammai’s disciple departed quietly.