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To the moms whose children’s sleep at 8:00 o clock :
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amother
Tan


 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 5:33 am
PLEASE tell me your secrets!!
How do you do it?
What time do they wake up?
How do you do on Shabbat ? (Especially summer time) they go to sleep before the seudah?and Sunday’s?
If they don’t wake up early do you wake them up?
How long does bedtime takes?
It is possible to do it whitout fighting /screaming ??
Ages 5, 3 and 2
I’m too tireeeed
Can’t anymoreee
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pesek zman




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 5:36 am
Bedtime is 8pm. I wake her up for school at 6:45-7. This has been her routine since 2.5 when she stopped napping. She doesn’t fall asleep right away. On weekends she often sleeps till 8-9pm. In summer we make early Shabbos so we can eat together but are flexible about bedtime if need be I can push it a 1/2 hour. Routine takes about 1/2 hour: book, milk, teeth, pee, songs, shema. It’s not painless but it’s our routine and she knows it
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amother
Azure


 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 5:37 am
Now my kids are older but when they were under seven they were asleep by seven thirty the latest. They usually got up early and I didn’t let them out of bed before 645. If they slept late I never woke them up. They didn’t stay up for shabbos until third grade I think. It was just a part of life. They didn’t know any different. When they stopped their naps they went to bed at 630. Now my oldest is in sixth and she doesn’t go to bed before nine thirty.
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 5:45 am
amother wrote:
PLEASE tell me your secrets!!
How do you do it?
What time do they wake up?
How do you do on Shabbat ? (Especially summer time) they go to sleep before the seudah?and Sunday’s?
If they don’t wake up early do you wake them up?
How long does bedtime takes?
It is possible to do it whitout fighting /screaming ??
Ages 5, 3 and 2
I’m too tireeeed
Can’t anymoreee
I have the opposite question, how are your children at those ages able to stay awake past 8? At those ages, my daughter was going to sleep between 6 and 6:30, no later. She would have been a monster. There was literally no way that she would have been able to sit up, let alone stay awake.
She would wake by 7.
With shabbat, yes, at those ages, the seuda is still pretty abstract and if a child is tired, they will just be nuts during the seuda, so it will just be counterproductive.
Even till today, my daughter is 10 and she goes to bed by 8ish and I have to wake her at 6:45 in the morning.

Of course its possible to do it without fighting and screaming. Why not tell us what a typical bedtime is and maybe some of us who have been through it can give you some tips.
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amother
Papaya


 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 5:45 am
When my kids where little, it was quiet by 7pm. My 5 year old still goes to sleep at 7. My kids where on the same schedule since they where babies, so it was nature to them to be in bed by 7. I also put in one kid at a time and then other one I put it once the first was asleep. 8:00 is late for kids of that age to go to sleep. In the summer shabbosim, if the dont nap Friday, they go to sleep at their regular bed time. Same for shabbos day.
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meme6




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 5:47 am
My 4 and 6 year old are in bed by 7 Shabbos they go to sleep when tired. When my kids were younger they went to sleep before the meals. The way to do it is be firm for a full week get there bodies used to bedtime. You can also start bedtime at 7 with the youngest and the next and so on cause it might be easier. What I know people do is give melatonin for 3 nights to get them used to it and then stop.
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amother
Amber


 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 5:54 am
Mine are 4.5 and 2 and they sleep together and are in bed at 7 every night . I work evenings so I had them on a schedule for a while . About a half hour before bedtime u have to start winding them down with wtvr your regular evening routine is . I dont bathe I do morning baths because they both still sleep in diapers and it grosses me out but most bathe at night, then pjs, maybe a fruit or veggie cut up so they dont say they are hungry once u put them in, a drink, bathroom. Once they are in bed read to them and say shma. You can use a chart in the beginning so that they dont come out but I always say as I'm leaving make mommy proud and stay in your room. They rarely come out ... they sing and talk to each other and usually within a half hour they are asleep . I also have audiobooks on my iPad sometimes they like listening to that in bed but not every night . Shabbos I treasure my quiet Friday night meals . We usually let they stay up and have grape juice but then they go to sleep . They wake up at 630 but that's the tradeoff. I'm ok with the early mornings..
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amother
Tan


 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 6:09 am
shabbatiscoming wrote:
I have the opposite question, how are your children at those ages able to stay awake past 8? At those ages, my daughter was going to sleep between 6 and 6:30, no later. She would have been a monster. There was literally no way that she would have been able to sit up, let alone stay awake.
She would wake by 7.

Here school starts at 9 ,so they wake up at 8 ...so it’s not super early so I guess that at 8 they are not that tired
I asked if you wake them up bc if I don’t they won’t before that .But I do wanna change that ...I’m thinking of waking them up at 7/7:30
my 3 years old it’s the only one that if he is tired ,he sleeps without any problem
My 5 years old can talk for 2 hours straight ,no joke and also gives excuses to not go to sleep ,she would say she need water ,bathroom etc ( even if she did before) EVEN when she is tired it’s like almost impossible to put her to sleep without at some point yelling at her , my husband it’s super patience and he also can’t stay calm when he puts her to sleep.
My 2 years old too ! Doesn’t matter if he is tired or not , he wont stay in bed . So sometimes I close the door of his room (I stay inside ) he cries desesperate and thennn he calms down I sleeps .
So the only one that it’s easy to sleep it’s the 3 years old but the others two make sure to not let him sleep 😭
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meme6




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 6:11 am
amother wrote:
Here school starts at 9 ,so they wake up at 8 ...so it’s not super early so I guess that at 8 they are not that tired
I asked if you wake them up bc if I don’t they won’t before that .But I do wanna change that ...I’m thinking of waking them up at 7/7:30
my 3 years old it’s the only one that if he is tired ,he sleeps without any problem
My 5 years old can talk for 2 hours straight ,no joke and also gives excuses to not go to sleep ,she would say she need water ,bathroom etc ( even if she did before) EVEN when she is tired it’s like almost impossible to put her to sleep without at some point yelling at her , my husband it’s super patience and he also can’t stay calm when he puts her to sleep.
My 2 years old too ! Doesn’t matter if he is tired or not , he wont stay in bed . So sometimes I close the door of his room (I stay inside ) he cries desesperate and thennn he calms down I sleeps .
So the only one that it’s easy to sleep it’s the 3 years old but the others two make sure to not let him sleep 😭


Why don’t you let them listen to a tape by bedtime maybe buy designated bedtime tapes. so they stay quiet and are in bed win win situation!
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amother
Papaya


 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 6:14 am
OP, nothing will happen if you let your toddler cry for a little. This is how he'll get into schedule and learn that you mean business about bedtime.
We tried cd's for a while, but I find that it kept them awake and perked up.
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shabbatiscoming




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 6:18 am
amother wrote:
Here school starts at 9 ,so they wake up at 8 ...so it’s not super early so I guess that at 8 they are not that tired
I asked if you wake them up bc if I don’t they won’t before that .But I do wanna change that ...I’m thinking of waking them up at 7/7:30
my 3 years old it’s the only one that if he is tired ,he sleeps without any problem
My 5 years old can talk for 2 hours straight ,no joke and also gives excuses to not go to sleep ,she would say she need water ,bathroom etc ( even if she did before) EVEN when she is tired it’s like almost impossible to put her to sleep without at some point yelling at her , my husband it’s super patience and he also can’t stay calm when he puts her to sleep.
My 2 years old too ! Doesn’t matter if he is tired or not , he wont stay in bed . So sometimes I close the door of his room (I stay inside ) he cries desesperate and thennn he calms down I sleeps .
So the only one that it’s easy to sleep it’s the 3 years old but the others two make sure to not let him sleep 😭
Would sticker charts work? Snd then when they have a certain amount of stickers they get a prize, for staying in their beds after bed time?
Also, I think if you wake them a bit earlier, they will automatically over time, get tired earier in the day as well.
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supty




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 6:20 am
My kids (2and 6) are in bed by 7:30, sleeping before 8, but they wake up everyday before 6:30 (sometimes even before 6). If your kids are waking up at 8- that’s probably why they don’t go to sleep early.
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amother
Amber


 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 6:24 am
I know its controversial but ask the doc about a low dose of melatonin for the 5 year old . Even if it's just for short term itll get her into a rhythm of going into bed and staying there and falling asleep . Also tapes or audiobooks and be super strict about not coming out . Use bribes , charts , contests but she can NOT come out . If she says she needs to use the bathroom more than once than tell her your going to have to take away her bedtime drink.
I know I sound drastic but like I said I work nights so I'm super strict and it works here ...
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amother
Tan


 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 6:28 am
amother wrote:
I know its controversial but ask the doc about a low dose of melatonin for the 5 year old . Even if it's just for short term itll get her into a rhythm of going into bed and staying there and falling asleep . Also tapes or audiobooks and be super strict about not coming out . Use bribes , charts , contests but she can NOT come out . If she says she needs to use the bathroom more than once than tell her your going to have to take away her bedtime drink.
I know I sound drastic but like I said I work nights so I'm super strict and it works here ...
It makes sense !!
I’m usually natural and don’t like to give those things to sleep but we came to a point that the way that it’s now it just not working! Not for me and not for them so I m deff asking her doc about it !
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amother
Salmon


 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 6:32 am
I think it's about having a consistent routine every evening. In our home it's dinner, homework, bath, snack (fruit or veg), brush teeth, bathroom, read book, lights out. They each have a small water bottle next to bed so they don't need to get up if they're thirsty. I sit in the room with the little ones until they're sleeping, but there's absolutely no talking. I just ignore anything directed at me. If someone needs the bathroom they go quickly without an announcement. I position the beds so it's not easy for them to team up. The little ones fall asleep immediately, so I know they must be tired. They usually sleep around 11-12 hours at that age. On shabbos they stay up starting around age 3. We do early shabbos in the summer so it isn't terribly late, and they only stay up for the first couple of courses, depending what time it is.
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Surrendered




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 6:37 am
Kids this young should be sleeping by 8. They need 12 hours of sleep.
What time do you put them to bed?
If they're having a hard time falling asleep, I would give a quarter piece of a mel-o-chew (melatonin) to help regulate their sleeping pattern.
Maybe storytelling or listening to CD or a noise machine can help them fall asleep better.
A quiet, dark room might help.
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amother
Scarlet


 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 6:41 am
amother wrote:
I know its controversial but ask the doc about a low dose of melatonin for the 5 year old . Even if it's just for short term itll get her into a rhythm of going into bed and staying there and falling asleep . Also tapes or audiobooks and be super strict about not coming out . Use bribes , charts , contests but she can NOT come out . If she says she needs to use the bathroom more than once than tell her your going to have to take away her bedtime drink.
I know I sound drastic but like I said I work nights so I'm super strict and it works here ...


I did this too. I gave my 3 yr dd 1/2 pill of melatonin and it made her so much calmer.
I go through the whole 9 yard bedtime routine and at one point she gave me such a hard time with the actual going to sleep she would literally jump out of bed when she saw me leaving the room. I gave her melatonin a couple times and it was legit magic.
I try to give her something to play with in bed like silly putty to take her mind off of coming out of bed. I sometimes give her a old dumb phone to play with which relaxes her (shsh this is probably a no no)
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ectomorph




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 6:50 am
I once started a thread offering advice on how I do this at 6pm and everyone seemed to hate me.

The short answer is-strict routine that starts early in the afternoon, early wake-up in the morning so that they are tired by 6pm and micro dose of melatonin once a month after traveling for maintenance of the schedule. My pediatrician says it's fine for 2 yes and up. No issues of dependency if you use less than once a month
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meme6




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 6:57 am
ectomorph wrote:
I once started a thread offering advice on how I do this at 6pm and everyone seemed to hate me.

The short answer is-strict routine that starts early in the afternoon, early wake-up in the morning so that they are tired by 6pm and micro dose of melatonin once a month after traveling for maintenance of the schedule. My pediatrician says it's fine for 2 yes and up. No issues of dependency if you use less than once a month


All you said very true and it all works key is consistency
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ra_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jan 28 2019, 7:15 am
Those ages should be in bed by 7pm.
Dinner at 5.
Bath at 6 (it's important to establish a calming bedtime routine so they wind down and their bodies know what to expect).
Shabbos in the summer their bodies still expect to eat dinner at 5pm, so serve them a pre-dinner, then at this age a kiddie seuda before or after candlelighting and bedtime after candlelighting.
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