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I hate messes



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amother
Apricot


 

Post Thu, Apr 04 2019, 9:09 pm
I’m claustrophobic and feel really distracted and out of control around clutter and disorganization.
My husband doesn’t mind clutter or messes. It takes tremendous focus for him to remember to clean up after himself or put things away.
My kids (ages 8 and below) are messy and need lots of prompting reminding and encouragement to sort of clean up after themselves.
My house is clean because I clean it. But I spend even more time and effort controlling how I feel around the mess and the people who help create it and don’t care to clean it up.
Help me
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amother
Fuchsia


 

Post Thu, Apr 04 2019, 9:12 pm
I'm very claustrophobic too but my husband constantly reminds me that the mess in my house is a "mess mitzva." It puts things in perspective a bit.
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amother
Apricot


 

Post Thu, Apr 04 2019, 9:20 pm
amother wrote:
I'm very claustrophobic too but my husband constantly reminds me that the mess in my house is a "mess mitzva." It puts things in perspective a bit.

That’s hilarious. But not comforting in the least
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Thu, Apr 04 2019, 10:18 pm
I totally get you. I live in a pretty small space so it feels like there's always a mess and it's always in my face, unless I'm constantly cleaning. My dh appreciates organization but not enough to actually keep things organized lol. He doesn't see the big deal about leaving a coffee cup lying around after he's finished with it. And my kids.... Forget it. They got none of my genes apparently.

Anyway, I basically have a multi pronged approach. One, when things are overwhelming me because I can't think straight with all the stuff around, I retreat to my bedroom. The kids can hang out in there with me but it's a clean zone, and I don't find it that hard to maintain. Two, I often give the kids a number of items that they each need to put away. I don't care who took it out or who was using it, if you know where it belongs, put it away. So it's not that hard for each one to find twenty items, and it really makes a dent. Three, I emphasized to dh how much it means to me to get his help in this area. I'll ask him straight out to please clear off the table or the floor or that shelf over there. As long as I delineate which area he should focus on, he happily joins in.
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