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Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Succos
Its soooo expensive



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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, May 20 2019, 4:10 pm
This year sukkos I'll be only with my 2 dds as dss will be away in yeshiva/uni....
My parents offered to bring me over to Israel as its way too expensive for me as a single mum (and they arent wealthy either). My mother doesnt want me to be on my own for y.t which is very thoughtful.
But tbh I cannot think of how to spend $2000 on just 3 tickets. Besides the apartment they'd hire, spending money there etc.
Im not 25 either but in my 40s... it just doesnt sit right with me.
Am I crazy or what?

On one hand maybe I need to do it 4 my kids on the other I have a lot of other important expenses hanging over my head.

What shall I do?
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thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2019, 4:13 pm
Deleted original response.
If your parents are offering to pay it means it's important to them for you to join them and whether you think it's a waste of money or not they obviously feel you are worth it. So accept graciously.
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OutATowner




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2019, 4:16 pm
If you start looking now you can find cheaper deals. And it's not just for tickets, it's instead of paying for yom tov food etc. And to be with family, a break, change of scenery, etc. Hope it works out for you!
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amother
Chartreuse


 

Post Mon, May 20 2019, 4:19 pm
$2000 for 3 round trip tickets succos time is a great deal. And if your parents are offering to pay, grab the opportunity!
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, May 20 2019, 11:13 pm
thunderstorm wrote:
Deleted original response.
If your parents are offering to pay it means it's important to them for you to join them and whether you think it's a waste of money or not they obviously feel you are worth it. So accept graciously.


Thanks..... they just feel bad that's why. I appreciate that but its very very hard earned money of theirs and I feel bad too. They paying 4 accommodation already and food etc so its just so hard 4 me to accept.
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, May 20 2019, 11:15 pm
OutATowner wrote:
If you start looking now you can find cheaper deals. And it's not just for tickets, it's instead of paying for yom tov food etc. And to be with family, a break, change of scenery, etc. Hope it works out for you!


Checked prices a few times, they exorbitant already imo
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baby12x




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, May 20 2019, 11:20 pm
1. If your parents want to spend time with you then that's thier decision to spend the money or not. You can offer to chip in for expenses if that is feasible for you
2. Factor in the amount it would cost for you to make sukkos on your own. Maybe offer that amount to your parents to alleviate your guilt.
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amother
Bronze


 

Post Mon, May 20 2019, 11:26 pm
Does it help if you flip it?

They want to spend time with you and kids, and you're saving them the time and hassle of travelling to YOU.

Win-win Smile
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, May 20 2019, 11:35 pm
amother [ Bronze ] wrote:
Does it help if you flip it?

They want to spend time with you and kids, and you're saving them the time and hassle of travelling to YOU.

Win-win Smile


Lol they'd go there regardless (coming here 4 shavuos Smile )
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amother
Bisque


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 4:09 am
My parents offered the same, and my family is bigger. I debated, but then I realized that if I don't go they will be all alone for yomtov, as they usually are.

I went and had an amazing time.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 5:15 am
Thanks every1 for your thiughts.
I appreciate the time you took to respond.

I think I will go.

Even if not for me it'll be for my girls. Its hard enough as it is yom tov without a father around. And really there is no ideal alternative of a yom tov if I stay home. What memories will they have? Of feeling 'that my parents are divorced and thats why we have a nebby and sad yom tov'?

They deserve it!!!
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amother
Olive


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 5:38 am
Accept it. Been there done that. Dont be the "bitter" person saying no thanks when offered by your own flesh and blood. Its not even a stranger. I take a lot. In my case both give but occasionally only one of them wants to give and dont want I tell my own other parent. I accept. This one offers but does not want I tell the other one. I accept then and in such a case I dont even tell the kids that "they" paid since its a secret. Accept and enjoy
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Raisin




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 7:53 am
If you are flexible with dates (eg your kids miss a day or two of school) you may get cheaper deals. If you are in the UK my relative there got really cheap tickets to Eilat from stansted or gatwick. (don't remember which airline)
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MiracleMama




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 7:57 am
I think you're a very sensitive and thoughtful daughter. And maybe it's not the biggest deal to be on your own for succos but it sounds like this trip would mean a lot to both your parents and your kids. I'd accept the kind offer.
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amother
Taupe


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 8:52 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Thanks every1 for your thiughts.
I appreciate the time you took to respond.

I think I will go.

Even if not for me it'll be for my girls. Its hard enough as it is yom tov without a father around. And really there is no ideal alternative of a yom tov if I stay home. What memories will they have? Of feeling 'that my parents are divorced and thats why we have a nebby and sad yom tov'?

They deserve it!!!

I'm not sure if your kids will feel that they are being nebby. Maybe you are afraid they will feel nebby. I hope I'm wrong.
You can try low-cost flight with WOW airways with stopover Iceland. But do your math very well sand check rules and conditions. Nonstop flights with the most attractive dates are usually the most expensive.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 9:25 am
amother [ Taupe ] wrote:
I'm not sure if your kids will feel that they are being nebby. Maybe you are afraid they will feel nebby. I hope I'm wrong.
You can try low-cost flight with WOW airways with stopover Iceland. But do your math very well sand check rules and conditions. Nonstop flights with the most attractive dates are usually the most expensive.


Having a teen who used to have beautiful family yom tov to sitting home alone with a mother and little sister/or going out for every meal isnt ideal or nice. I'd put up with it and can find plenty reasons why not to go.
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amother
Blue


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 9:45 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Having a teen who used to have beautiful family yom tov to sitting home alone with a mother and little sister/or going out for every meal isnt ideal or nice. I'd put up with it and can find plenty reasons why not to go.


While I 100% think you should go to your parents.... why would you be alone? Do you not have friends and neighbors to go to and to invite to your home as well?
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SixOfWands




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 9:57 am
amother [ Taupe ] wrote:
I'm not sure if your kids will feel that they are being nebby. Maybe you are afraid they will feel nebby. I hope I'm wrong.
You can try low-cost flight with WOW airways with stopover Iceland. But do your math very well sand check rules and conditions. Nonstop flights with the most attractive dates are usually the most expensive.


Wow folded a few months ago.

But I agree that there's no reason for kids to feel "nebby" because their parents are divorced. I think that OP is projecting her own feelings onto them, and its something that she need to work on.

OP, you can make a beautiful sukkot at home. If you have your own sukkah, you can put it up. Decorate it -- you can have the girliest sukkah ever for your daughters. Invite friends and neighbors, especially those without their own sukkahs. Or just on your own, you don't need to be as traditional. At night, we like having soup in the sukkah. Just soup (and kiddush and motzei, if its chag). (We use a gallon thermos to transport the soup, so it doesn't spill.) Its just us, and we like it. Create traditions and memories
of your own.

And if you don't have your own sukkah, let people know. Trust me, the invitations will flow in.

(Of course, if your parents want you to come with them ... GO)
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amother
Olive


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 11:29 am
Why should we try to dissuade her from the oportunity her kids will have of change of scenery and use of an airplane and seing different things and being with overseas grandparents a bit? My daughter came with us to my parents at another country and our program there for chol hamoed was not major and not costly. One day the kids rented bikes at a park there and the rest I dont even remember. Nevertheless she has awsome memories.
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Raisin




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 12:48 pm
amother [ Chartreuse ] wrote:
$2000 for 3 round trip tickets succos time is a great deal. And if your parents are offering to pay, grab the opportunity!


the Op sounds British. Thats not such a great deal from the UK.
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