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Encouragement for Maaser
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 7:18 pm
I’m mortified to say this but I’m totally not on top of giving maaser. I’m barely making it each month so I kind of justify that I don’t have any extra. Please give me any inspiration / tips / chizzuk in this regard.
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amother
Chocolate


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 7:19 pm
My rav said if you’re struggling you don’t have to give masser. We count our tuition as maaser. Sorry, not sure if that’s the encouragement you’re looking for!
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Kumphort




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 7:22 pm
Our shul rav one said. Ur mitzvah is to separate maaser. Once u separate if you are the one that needs the $$ then use it for yourself We have a separate bank account and automatically put the $$ into that account Then u can use it as u see fit
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amother
Maroon


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 7:23 pm
When I first got married, we were struggling financially. I couldn't bring myself to just give maaser and made lots of different cheshbonos that helped us kinda get away with it. My hus band was not happy about it and after a while he put a stop to it and we started religiously giving maaser. I have to say from that moment on our finances went up and up. We still don't have much but it's incomparable to the struggle we used to have.

I have found time and again that whenever finance feel tight I remember that we fell behind in maaser. it's not always easy to give large amounts to tzedakah when we are far from comfortable but I know and have seen that you give and you get.

Hatzlacha.
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amother
Burlywood


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 7:26 pm
I have seen, more than once, that we received unexpected income after giving maaser.
To me, it’s clear. As Rashi (? )Says, “Aser bishvil shetisasher.”
May we all be zoche to live without financial concerns.
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amother
Burgundy


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 7:35 pm
Kumphort wrote:
Our shul rav one said. Ur mitzvah is to separate maaser. Once u separate if you are the one that needs the $$ then use it for yourself We have a separate bank account and automatically put the $$ into that account Then u can use it as u see fit


Same. We separate immediately and goes to wherever its needed, tuition, shabbos food, desperately need pair shoes etc.
Main thing is to designate it first as maaser.
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amother
Scarlet


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 7:47 pm
I was taught that when you give maaser, Hashem gives it back to you. I have found this to be true.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 8:07 pm
Anyone give maaser specifically if their husband is in kollel? Also looking to hear more general encouragement.
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amother
Mustard


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 8:24 pm
My husband in is kollel and we give maaser religiously. I've been scrupulous about it since my days of working as a camp counselor and I believe that that is what makes it not difficult for me to give. I also believe that our carefulness is a big factor in our ability to live very simply but without financial strain.
We automatically separate it as soon as we receive any money and put it into a separate account. It's amazing to watch that number grow, especially since we are saving up to go to a specific person in the future.
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amother
Maroon


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 8:28 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Anyone give maaser specifically if their husband is in kollel? Also looking to hear more general encouragement.


My husband is in kollel...we don't own a house and I work hard to pay our bills without any support or programs..yet, maaser has proven to help us financially again and again.

It's an incredible feeling to be able to give.
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amother
Vermilion


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 8:39 pm
DH in kollel. Give maaser religiously. I used to complain to DH when counting my earnings minus maaser that it came out to so little. He kept on telling me to count it WITH maaser, bec. that IS part of my earning and it will bring us bracha financially. It's taken me a long time to make that shift, but I do see it working. I don't have dollars and cents stories, but I really feel that its giving us back way more than we give.
Also, I'm not so familiar with the halachos, but there are certain things you can use maaser for which may anyway be a given expense for you.
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amother
Ruby


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 8:40 pm
My story:

We've been struggling for more than 20 years, not making it month to month, so we didn't separate Maaser as we couldn't buy basic food.
Fast forward to about a year ago:
We started keeping strict calculations of every penny coming in, if we get things like interest a few dollars from anything anywhere, we calculate and don't use for ourselves even if we need.
We started noticing that we manage every month now, even when it looks like we won't, we pull through!
Our Parnassah hasn't changed much but somehow unexpected money comes in every month and we somehow cover!
I became a staunch Maaser giver!
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, May 21 2019, 10:46 pm
Thanks all for your responses, it’s helpful for me. Anyone else?
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amother
Amber


 

Post Wed, May 22 2019, 12:02 am
Another "maaser brings brachos" person here!

We give a fifth to tzedakah actually, even though we were told we technically can give just 1% (10% of maaser) since it helps our overall financial situation so much it's a no-brainer.

We used to be in really bad financial straits. Now it's not great, but much more manageable. And the families that are the direct beneficiaries of that maaser (friends of ours) are therefore in better financial shape too.

I used to have a really hard time giving it, but now I feel like I MUST give it right as soon as the money hits my bank account.
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amother
Olive


 

Post Wed, May 22 2019, 12:57 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Anyone give maaser specifically if their husband is in kollel? Also looking to hear more general encouragement.


Yes, we do. But only on my income. My husband kollel stipend we dont (based on a rav).
It was hard at the beginning but now it's not even "my money". I tell hashem: we give maaser even though it's hard for us. Remember that when you decide our parnassah.
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amother
Smokey


 

Post Wed, May 22 2019, 1:02 am
amother [ Ruby ] wrote:
My story:

We've been struggling for more than 20 years, not making it month to month, so we didn't separate Maaser as we couldn't buy basic food.
Fast forward to about a year ago:
We started keeping strict calculations of every penny coming in, if we get things like interest a few dollars from anything anywhere, we calculate and don't use for ourselves even if we need.
We started noticing that we manage every month now, even when it looks like we won't, we pull through!
Our Parnassah hasn't changed much but somehow unexpected money comes in every month and we somehow cover!
I became a staunch Maaser giver!


Amazing! Can you give a few examples of where unexpected money has been coming in from?
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amother
Hotpink


 

Post Wed, May 22 2019, 4:02 am
I also was not very careful with giving maaser.

I had noticed for some time that although enough money comes in to cover our needs, somehow we end up getting unexpected bills and expenses and we have a hard time finishing the month... This month I decided to put money aside, and the very next day I was called into my boss' office, who gave me a substantial raise! I almost couldn't believe it...
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amother
Natural


 

Post Wed, May 22 2019, 8:43 pm
Hashem can reward you by giving you more money or by less bills. There is no way to know what expenses could have come up that didn't.
ways that we have gotten money
interest on investments
payouts? on investments- forgot the technical term
surprise cash presents from family members
inheritance


we've had various expenses, no way to know if we would have more if we didn't give maaser. We try hard to be makpid on it and b"H we can always afford our bills. I'm not judging and can't say we would definitely be as makpid if we struggled financially but also don't know if maybe the reason why we don't struggle financially is because we are makpid on maaser.

Tzedakah is something that has always been something that my family felt strongly about. One of the things I fell in love with about my dh, that he was makpid about maaser. Of course he has many other great qualities that made me want to marry him but this but this one thing that was a big deal for me as well Wink
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amother
Aqua


 

Post Wed, May 22 2019, 10:56 pm
Op, all the stories here about "miraculous savings" from hashem bec of maaser are true but its not common. I believe in hashem and believe everyonr must give maaser but at the same time I know and experienced that the chazal of "getting bac if you give maaser" is not necessarily literally to mean with money etc...my rav told me I can use tuition as my maaser and my tuition is much more than my maaser(which is 10%) .

But, I tell my kids we need to take maaser if you got $20 present or... I want to teach my kids now just like my mom taught me to maaser everything I earned wen I babysat...

But, even though my mom gave maaser very diligently and kept records, we didnt have miraculous stories happen to us and a lot of my earnings from my teenage jobs, I had to use to by myself basics. So too, I know others who literally live paycheck to paycheck and give maaser but didnt see hashem make a miracle...instead the dh got laid off.

I dont want you to be disillusioned and think that if you give maaser, your troubles will be gone. I hope that you will do well financially but everyone supposed to give maaser even if they dont see hashem "send miracles of more money". But, of course if someone is so so poor, then they should of course ask a rav about their circumstances if they have to give.

Op, you cant go behind dhs back and ask the rav. You can say to your dh that you would like to revisit the issue and this time you would like to go to the rav with your dh. Then, you can explain to the rav and he can explain it to you so that you get more clarity and feel you are doing the right thing.
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amother
OP


 

Post Wed, May 22 2019, 11:03 pm
Op here (I’m not the one who posted about her husband, btw.)

So today I opened a separate checking account, and transferred several hundred dollars that I know I “back owe.” It’s a scary feeling because now my regular checking account is much tighter - with the maaser money that I separated all would have been covered, now it’s just just...

I do believe that Hashem controls my finances, and no I’m not expecting a miracle.

I guess one of the reasons I struggle with this is because how does it make sense to be giving away when you’re struggling financially yourself?
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