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Forum -> Chinuch, Education & Schooling
Monsey Cheder similar to Imrei Binah
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amother
Honeydew


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 5:53 pm
I totally get you. I think a lot of parents break rules and today it's really hard to get the internet out of the house. In general while raising kids the less internet the better. What are your hashkafos? Maybe we can help you narrow down to a few schools to apply.
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amother
Amber


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 6:08 pm
What cheder are your boys currently in? We can tell you what's the most similar.
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thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 6:27 pm
OP, as a heads up , the Finkelstien Library which is the public library based in Monsey has an assortment of jewish/frum and Kosher DVDs. They have Elmo and others too. People take them out of the library instead of purchasing DVDs. They also have the frum books for little kids to adults. The place is always packed with frum kids making their selections.
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amother
OP


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 6:34 pm
thunderstorm wrote:
OP, as a heads up , the Finkelstien Library which is the public library based in Monsey has an assortment of jewish/frum and Kosher DVDs. They have Elmo and others too. People take them out of the library instead of purchasing DVDs. They also have the frum books for little kids to adults. The place is always packed with frum kids making their selections.


Thank you so much!!! This is very helpful. If this is more acceptable then there’s no reason not to do that instead.
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amother
Jade


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 6:45 pm
I am very curious what "bad" things you heard about Imrei Shefer. It's a very solid cheder. They have a rule that kids can't have access to internet and parents can't use internet in front of kids. I feel that's fair. I download YouTube videos so that my kids can watch it offline. I am uncomfortable with YouTube videos because even with a filter, sometimes the ads popping up in between clips are not ads I would want my boys seeing.
Anyway, I get annoyed when people decide that a cheder or school has a name as being good or not without evidence to back it up. To rephrase amother's question more respectfully, why do you think that Imrei Shefer parents are worse? I related very well to your post, and feel we have much in common. Not trying to convince you to send here, but am trying to understand what you think I am doing wrong that you aren't.
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amother
Amber


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 7:00 pm
Imrei shefer is more strict with internet/smartphone rules than Munkatch.
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amother
Beige


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 7:58 pm
Op I will say this it sounds just like a lot of city people that came to monsey and think they can do what they want! And cheders became more strict. All cheders are basically over full now so if you didn’t apply you have a slim chance of getting in!

And as a monsey person your attitude annoys me tremendously because people like you have changed what monsey was
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thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 8:07 pm
amother [ Beige ] wrote:
Op I will say this it sounds just like a lot of city people that came to monsey and think they can do what they want! And cheders became more strict. All cheders are basically over full now so if you didn’t apply you have a slim chance of getting in!

And as a monsey person your attitude annoys me tremendously because people like you have changed what monsey was

I think this is a very hurtful post. Maybe re-word it so it doesn't shtech so much
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amother
Amber


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 8:11 pm
Amothet beige, exactly my thoughts.
Many people that move from Brooklyn have such an attitude that it literally changed Monsey.
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amother
Indigo


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 8:36 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Thank you so much!!! This is very helpful. If this is more acceptable then there’s no reason not to do that instead.

Many chadorim do not allow the kids to go into the library. I know my cheder doesn't, but we do it anyway.
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thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 8:48 pm
amother [ Indigo ] wrote:
Many chadorim do not allow the kids to go into the library. I know my cheder doesn't, but we do it anyway.

My kids are not allowed but I go myself and take the books and stuff out for them.
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amother
Amber


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 8:58 pm
My kids mosdos does not allow the kids to go to the library. Most don't allow it.
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amother
OP


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 9:05 pm
amother [ Amber ] wrote:
Amothet beige, exactly my thoughts.
Many people that move from Brooklyn have such an attitude that it literally changed Monsey.


You guys don’t even know where I’m moving from lol and I really think you have the wrong idea of who we are. We are NOT one of those families who ignore the rules or dress in a way that’s against the rules. We are not disrespectful to anyone.
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amother
Aquamarine


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 9:26 pm
OP. Why would you want to push your way into a moised that is not aligned with your hashkofa? Do you need your children should act / feel about your hashkofa as some of the people here. I'm not blaming or look down at them, I understand that the internet issue for them is "chazir - treif". (but how come they are able to comment here without internet connection is a mystery to me.)
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amother
OP


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 9:36 pm
amother [ Aquamarine ] wrote:
OP. Why would you want to push your way into a moised that is not aligned with your hashkofa? Do you need your children should act / feel about your hashkofa as some of the people here. I'm not blaming or look down at them, I understand that the internet issue for them is "chazir - treif". (but how come they are able to comment here without internet connection is a mystery to me.)


My kids are young and don’t know that they are watching YouTube , or that we have internet access. They know that we have the laptop for business purposes and every now and then get to watch a fun clip.

People are so quick to judge and view things as black and white. I had a very difficult year and when I felt like I desperately need a few minutes for myself, and didn’t have what to occupy my kids with, I showed them a Sesame Street clip or a fun kids channel.

The reason I’m considering sending to a Cheder like imrei binah is because according to the feedback we got on other chederim, it didn’t seem like the right fit. It’s possible that we’d fit in somewhere in between imrei binah and imrei shefer.
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thunderstorm




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 9:49 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
My kids are young and don’t know that they are watching YouTube , or that we have internet access. They know that we have the laptop for business purposes and every now and then get to watch a fun clip.

People are so quick to judge and view things as black and white. I had a very difficult year and when I felt like I desperately need a few minutes for myself, and didn’t have what to occupy my kids with, I showed them a Sesame Street clip or a fun kids channel.

The reason I’m considering sending to a Cheder like imrei binah is because according to the feedback we got on other chederim, it didn’t seem like the right fit. It’s possible that we’d fit in somewhere in between imrei binah and imrei shefer.

There's really nothing in between. Maybe Vien is the next to the most similar. Bais Dovid has lots of Chasidish boys . It's a mix of yeshivish , heimish and Chasidish. The rebbeim are all Chasidish and so are the three menahelim . But they are strict about their rules and teach in a litvish Havara even though the melamdim speak Chasidish Yiddish. It's a mish mash.
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amother
Aquamarine


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 10:04 pm
OP. You heard solid good info about Imrei Shefer but you are afraid about the parents and the children, correct? My advice to you, go check it out yourself. Call the Yeshiva if you could come over for a few minutes to have a schmooze about the Yeshiva in the meantime look around on the kids.
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amother
Amber


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 10:05 pm
OP, how young can your kids be if they're too old for Imrei Binah???
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amother
Yellow


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 10:07 pm
amother [ Aquamarine ] wrote:
OP. Why would you want to push your way into a moised that is not aligned with your hashkofa? Do you need your children should act / feel about your hashkofa as some of the people here. I'm not blaming or look down at them, I understand that the internet issue for them is "chazir - treif". (but how come they are able to comment here without internet connection is a mystery to me.)


Hashkofa is a broad term and encompasses many nuances. Just because a person doesn't agree with 1, 2 or 3 things of a certain hashkafic lifestyle, it doesn't mean that the person is not aligned with the rest of that lifestyle. Especially as you head more towards the right, where the rules and expectations are more much rampant and rigid. If a person doesn't agree that the ideal that women shouldn't drive, or if a person believes that supervised and restricted internet access better prepares a child for the future, etc., it doesn't mean that she needs to drop all the rest of it just because of it. I would compare it to don't throw the baby out with the bathwater.

Life is not black and white, nor is it simple & straightforward. Even a group of people living the same hashkafic lifestyle have their differences. No matter what we are taught to do, people are not cookie cutters of one another. Should a person only remain within a certain hashkofa only if they agree to every single aspect of it? And if they agree with the majority of it, but have qualms about the minority of it, should they be forced to change their and their children's entire hashkafah just because of it?

I don't get this concept that is frequently thrown out on this board. You drive, you let your kids watch dvds, now you must drop the rest of your chassidish mesorah, and move over to a new community. I understand that if you're doing these things in an in-your-face type of behavior, then perhaps a person should re-evaluate their approach and lifestyle. But if I go about my behavior quietly, I.e. I drive out of town or I allow supervised internet here and there, and keep it on the down-low, I don't see a need to give up my entire mesorah. True, I have to be prepared for the consequences if something becomes public, but that doesn't mean I shouldn't try to find a school that would be the best fit for my kids within my hashkafic circles.

I find it sad though, that all these problems are only created because of this exclusive school systems that we have created in the name of yiddishkeit. This is not Torah, this is not yiddishkeit, nor is it halacha. This is just messed up frumkeit.
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amother
OP


 

Post Thu, Jun 06 2019, 10:14 pm
amother [ Amber ] wrote:
OP, how young can your kids be if they're too old for Imrei Binah???


They don’t have acces to my laptop and when they watch, I’m the one who plays it for them. When they watch something, they can’t tell whether it’s Windows media player or YouTube. They never play on the laptop.
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