Do you gift for every baby?

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Forum -> Relationships -> Giving Gifts

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amother

Sat, Jun 15 2019, 11:01 pm

In the frum world people are having so many babies it’s hard to keep up. Do you give a gift to your friends and family for every baby? Or just the first? I gave friends and family for all their firsts but now they’re on seconds and thirds etc and it feels like a lot. I feel like everyone is constantly having babies around me and I’m constantly buying gifts or making supper. How do you come up with a new (affordable) gift every time? It you buy a gift, does that exempt you from making supper or do you still do both?

allthingsblue

Sat, Jun 15 2019, 11:03 pm

Supper exempts from gift (unless super close family or friend).
You can buy a small ($10) gift or chip in with others for any further babies after #1.
You can shop for cute outfits/accessories during sale season, stock up, and keep for future use.

It's also totally acceptable in many circles to not give after child #1, but I like giving gifts so I try.

mom!

Sat, Jun 15 2019, 11:05 pm

Depends on my relationship with them.
Try to chip in with others when necessary.

SuperWify

Sat, Jun 15 2019, 11:53 pm

Only if I’m really close - like a sister, BFF, boss or cousin, or if the friend did not just have a baby the year before...

For first babies I love buying this: https://www.amazon.com/Tiny-Lo.....r=8-1
A friend got it for me and my baby loved it. It’s well priced and because it’s attaches to a stroller or doona it can be used every day. Good for newborns until 18 months at least. (This company by the way is a Israeli frum company so why not support a Jew?)

For smaller gifts I buy baby hats when they go in sale in Jewish stores, wrap them nicely and it looks the same had it costed $20.

You can also buy hats and pompous on AliExpress and see on a snap. You can gift one hat (say white) and two pompoms in different colors (say gray and blue) so you can switch things up.

amother

Orchid

Sat, Jun 15 2019, 11:55 pm

In our family we buy a big item just for the first, that can be used for years. Like a swing, crib, car seat, exersaucer.... we give the parents a choice what they want.

polka dots

Sun, Jun 16 2019, 12:03 am

Gift giving can become quite expensive so I only give to close people. But I still like to send over s/th Small to a neighbor, workmate.... I ordered on AliExpress bunch of silicone pacifier clips, really cute and under 5 bucks each and can give whenever needed

meme6

Sun, Jun 16 2019, 12:04 am

First baby mostly but I always send a supper . No you do not need to gift for every baby sometimes for someone special you can.

amother

Seashell

Sun, Jun 16 2019, 1:18 am

I received more gifts for my first than my second. I also generally only gift for first babies too.
I do make suppers though not only for first babies, because the mother has to rest and recover regardless of how many children she has. I know that I appreciate a supper or help after birth more than a gift.

essie14

Sun, Jun 16 2019, 2:05 am

For family (siblings and first cousins) I buy a gift for every baby, as well as a few BFF who are like family. Outfit, nice board book or good quality toy.
Neighbors and local friends - I join the mealtrain no matter what number child.
I also bought some of those tag baby blankets on AliExpress and give them out if I feel I need to give a gift as well. Everyone always appreciates something new like that.

amother

Emerald

Sun, Jun 16 2019, 5:01 am

unless it is a close friend or family member we do the following:
every child born in our kehilla (small) we give a gift. I stock up on cheap but nice gifts, have them ready wrapped nicely and only write a very personal card to accompany the present. also we cook.
I stock up on presents under 10 euro. but they have to be really nice Smile

eg: childrens cutlery in a nice box or supernice quality baby pyjamas (branded) on sale, silverplated zedukebox in the shape of a babyshoe... nice but cheap. the card I try to write evry personal and deep with bruches and wishes etc.
a close friend will get a bigger gift for the first child, we might chip in for the stroller or a photoshoot or whatever they organise.

(and if there are younger siblings we also send nosh or coloured pencils , a rubiks cube, jumping rope ...something small from the 1 eurp store that they can enjoy.)

amother

Sun, Jun 16 2019, 11:53 am

Some great ideas here. If any of you have some good aliexpress links please post!
Also, do you gift for every upsherin?

ectomorph

Sun, Jun 16 2019, 12:07 pm

No way. I do what I can. I only give siblings and only for first child. And small gift.

WitchKitty

Sun, Jun 16 2019, 12:13 pm

When they have like 10 kids, supper comes out about the same price of a gift....
I have this question all the time. Should I buy something, and more important, what?
Sometimes I wonder why they even deserve gifts. She has a new BABY and I'm buying her a present? And I don't have ANY and I don't get any presents.

amother

Babypink

Sun, Jun 16 2019, 12:19 pm

I don't give gifts and don't make supper. I didn't receive any gifts or supper either. I had all my babies very close together and everyone around me is having babies all the time so it's impossible to keep up. I take care of myself. I buy myself gifts that I would want to get and I spend some money on food after I have my baby.

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