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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Infants
What should we tell people?



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amother
OP


 

Post Sat, Jun 15 2019, 2:08 pm
My one year old is set to have surgery for a birth defect on his genitalia. I don't want people to know , but in my community I can't hide that he's having some sort of surgery. What can I tell people who ask?
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Rappel




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Jun 15 2019, 2:23 pm
"He's having minor cosmetic surgery on his abdomen. Please daven it goes well."

Followed up with:

"Did any of your kids ever had surgery? Please tell me all about it."

And if they're really nosy and still presing you for information:

"I'd rather not discuss details. It feels really personal, you know what I mean? I'll just be glad when it's all over."
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ectomorph




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Jun 15 2019, 6:35 pm
Yeah, just say it's on his abdomen. If they asl for details say it stresses you to talk about it.
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amother
Olive


 

Post Sat, Jun 15 2019, 6:59 pm
Does it make sense to say it’s a hernia operation? That’s fairly innocuous. I don’t know if they do them on newborns.
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amother
Khaki


 

Post Sat, Jun 15 2019, 7:07 pm
My son had a procedure done and the healing was so quick, we really didn't have to tell anyone about it. The only person I told was my mom because she was babysitting my other kids...
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Surrendered




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Jun 15 2019, 8:54 pm
You can say it's a hernia surgery or that he's having a little procedure. It won't make a difference to them exactly what it's about. Refuah Sheleima, May all go smoothly.
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smileyone




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Jun 15 2019, 10:26 pm
My son had a surgery on his testicles. Told a few close people who I knew wouldn't share, that was for my sake. We didnt tell anyone else including my inlaws who get anxious and can make us anxious. I felt like I needed to protect his privacy. His hospital stay was short, though. Are you able to keep it quiet?
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amother
Slategray


 

Post Sat, Jun 15 2019, 10:51 pm
amother [ Olive ] wrote:
Does it make sense to say it’s a hernia operation? That’s fairly innocuous. I don’t know if they do them on newborns.

I had a hernia operation as an infant. I was actually born with a hernia.
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amother
Pearl


 

Post Sat, Jun 15 2019, 10:53 pm
I would just say minor procedure (unless its far from minor, then I would just say procedure). Most normal ppl won't press. Those who do, say have to go or don't want to discuss.
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amother
Linen


 

Post Sat, Jun 15 2019, 10:54 pm
Just say hernia it’s so common
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amother
Lemon


 

Post Sun, Jun 16 2019, 1:37 am
my baby recently had surgery for an undescended testicle. turned out he had a hernia on the other side as well, though it wasnt externally visible. We just told most ppl he had a hernia. closer friends and family knew it was for the undescended testicle. I wouldn't shout it from the rooftops, but whats really embarrassing about it?
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amother
Honeydew


 

Post Sun, Jun 16 2019, 3:13 am
My workmate told everyone that her son id have hernia operation, its pretty common.
hatzlocho
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 16 2019, 4:49 am
Rappel wrote:
"He's having minor cosmetic surgery on his abdomen. Please daven it goes well."

Followed up with:

"Did any of your kids ever had surgery? Please tell me all about it."

And if they're really nosy and still presing you for information:

"I'd rather not discuss details. It feels really personal, you know what I mean? I'll just be glad when it's all over."


Re the bolded: As long as OP doesn't feel pressured to reciprocate in detail.
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