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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Teenagers and Older children
“what are some status items my teenage girl should bring to
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ruchelbuckle




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 25 2019, 4:14 pm
amother [ Scarlet ] wrote:
If you want to send to a camp that doesnt have any of this craziness send to camp sternberg. Its a wide variety of girls, so if you cant handle your daughter beng "exposed" to sliiiightly more modern girls then I guess you'll have to miss out. But there is really no focus on cute linen and a canvas folding chair. The "shtick" people tend to focus on is good snacks, and fun attitudes.


That’s very nice and all, but not helpful. The mother already signed her daughter up for Maarava.

Gosh, will everyone over here take a freaking chill pill? Again, the mother is not talking about buying $1200 Gucci skirts from Nordstrom (yes, I saw them on their website). She just wants to find out what are some items that are very common that a bunch of the kids will have... (ie— natives, etc...) No one is talking about spending beyond their means of taking out credit card debt or anything else... just getting your kids some stuff for camp.

I'm really happy that all of you have perfect kids that have a ton of chen. That's wonderful that people are naturally attracted to them without too much external help. But for the rest of the kids in the world, realistically speaking, having some externals that are trendy are helpful at the beginning, kind of like an icebreaker.

And yes, in an ideal world, we wouldn't crave acceptance so much, but please. Let's not kid ourselves. There's plenty of this as adults, too. Why do you go into frum neighborhoods and everyone is pushing certain strollers, driving certain cars, etc., etc., etc... let's just be honest with ourselves. Right or wrong, people want to fit in. And yes, if we were on the level that we "SHOULD" be on, then we wouldn't care. But most of us aren't. So let's cut this mom some slack.

Oh and btw, I recently asked a well know mechanech and parenting lecturer about this. He told me that there is nothing wrong with buying these types of things within limits for your kids. And in fact, it’s healthy— for a lot of kids, it fills an emotional need!!!
My son wanted Tiro pants (these ridiculous adidas sweatpants). So I made up with him that I would buy 2 and he would buy 2.

So everyone, just please RELAX


Last edited by ruchelbuckle on Tue, Jun 25 2019, 8:55 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Jun 25 2019, 5:01 pm
Groovy 1224 way to go!!
Amother white- and Ra mom-thank you
Rochelbuckle- you hit the nail on the head again.

Imasinger- I’ve been working in all your suggestions for a while now and at the same time choose to provide some trendy stuff.
Thank you
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sim




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 25 2019, 8:25 pm
My girls bring the following:
Cute throw to cover the bed (5 below)
Funny graphic tshirts for pjs, with leggings (5below, forever21)
Cat ear headbands
Tutus (one even lights up!)
Different colored nail polish, for toes
Knee socks in funny patterns (target)
Lots of colorful bins for their stuff (target)
Camp chair (5below)
Via ice coffee packets and plastic ice coffee cups
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Happydance




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 25 2019, 8:39 pm
Tutus?
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sky




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 25 2019, 8:56 pm
ruchelbuckle wrote:
That’s very nice and all, but not helpful. The mother already signed her daughter up for Maarava.
Gosh, will everyone over here take a freaking chill pill? Again, the mother is not talking about buying $1200 Gucci skirts from Nordstrom (yes, I saw them on their website). She just wants to find out what are some items that are very common that a bunch of the kids will have... (ie— natives, etc...) No one is talking about spending beyond their means of taking out credit card debt or anything else... just getting your kids some stuff for camp.
Oh and btw, I recently asked a well know mechanech and parenting lecturer about this. He told me that there is nothing wrong with buying these types of things within limits for your kids. And in fact, it’s healthy— for a lot of kids, it fills an emotional need!!!
My son wanted Tiro pants (these ridiculous adidas sweatpants). So I made up with him that I would buy 2 and he would buy 2.
So everyone, just please RELAX


(My son also wants tiros for camp. That is important to him. I also said I’d go in 50-50 with him on a few pairs. But then he didn’t need it anymore. Smile. Please post it you find s good deal because I still plan on buying 2 pairs. And do teen boys wear natives in camp?)

While my son doesn’t care about linen and I really am thrifty and don’t like to spend I’m buying him some extras for camp - like slippers, branded shirts or pants. I’d love to know what other boys bring to camp extra as well. Not because we are into materialism but at the end of the day a teen is a teen and camp is camp.
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sky




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 25 2019, 9:16 pm
Can we also stop that sternberg is some sort of utopia. I went there alone after having some wonderful years at a more affluent camp.
It’s true the linen didn’t matter. But so much more did that I didn’t know about before hand. And my summer was absolute misery.
It’s a great camp and I did go back other years. But to say that materialism and social status doesn’t matter is just not true.
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1091




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jun 25 2019, 9:25 pm
meme6 wrote:
A big nosh box!


DD19 was just telling me over shabbos that she and her sisters were bullied because the nosh box I sent with them was small.
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amother
Teal


 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 1:26 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
First time dd 12yrs attending skeepaway camp.
Please fill me in... want her to fit in well- socially

TIA


Ugh, the first thing she needs is someone to teach her proper values and that status items for a 12 year old is teaching her the absolute wrong thing!
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amother
Teal


 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 1:27 pm
SixOfWands wrote:
Kids focus on chairs because during free time, like after dinner a lot of nights, they like to sit outside and hang out, and there are no chairs provided. So sure. You can stand your ground and say no chair. But your kid will be standing when her friends hang out.

And cute sheets are really about the same price as solids or ugly patterns.

No one is talking about packing the kid up in a Louis Vuitton trunk, and making sure that she has 1 ct diamond studs in each ear, for heavens sake. They're talking about little, fun things that the girls might enjoy, like a tutu, or face paint for color war, or cool hair clips or a funky pair of flip flops. I just don't see why anyone would want to deprive their kid of that if they could avoid it.

My kids also liked a small rug for next to their beds, because it can be chilly in the morning.


Tutu and face paint aren’t status.
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SixOfWands




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 1:44 pm
amother [ Teal ] wrote:
Tutu and face paint aren’t status.


Because you don't think that they are?

A status item is just something that kids want. For my oldest (a boy), it was hockey tape. A whole roll costs less than $5, but its was highly prized by all. For girls, its often a tutu. Darned if I know why.

BTW, OP, forget status. Make sure you send a sealable plastic box for any junk food that you send. We've had the best luck with Sterlite.
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ruchelbuckle




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 1:59 pm
amother [ Teal ] wrote:
Ugh, the first thing she needs is someone to teach her proper values and that status items for a 12 year old is teaching her the absolute wrong thing!


Great! Since you are clearly an expert in raising adolescents today, why don’t you step out from behind amother, go to OPs house, and teach her daughter “proper values.” The truth is, I just bought my son Tiro pants for sports at camp. I guess he (nor I) doesn’t really have proper values. Maybe could you come over here as well? Maybe we could organize a group class?

Never mind that he gets up on time during his summer vacation to go to shul, helps me around the house, and takes his little siblings to the park so I can rest. Oh, and he learns with a 3rd grade boy whose parents are divorced and father lives far away. You’re right. I should not “fargen” him these stupid Tiro pants, because wanting to fit in with your peers is a huge aveira. Hopefully he will learn that you need to fast on 3 consecutive Mondays and Thursdays for even dreaming of wanting to fit in. It’s very clear that he is lacking “proper values” and you’ll do a good job of reinforcing them.

Amother Teal— please go find someone else to bully.
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amother
Royalblue


 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 2:19 pm
Hi op, cute hand towels (just colored) besides her bath towels. And for swimming, alot of the older girls wear athletic shorts and cute t-shirts over their bathing suits. The tutus, funky toenail polish, and camp chairs are very appreciated. And for clothes: Junee's Tshirts, Monti Carlos skirts, Hardtail skirts and shirts, Adidas sneakers, and Natives shoes seem to be the trendy status brand items. May all our daughters feel pretty, popular, and grow in self esteem this summer!
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keym




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 2:27 pm
ruchelbuckle wrote:
Great! Since you are clearly an expert in raising adolescents today, why don’t you step out from behind amother, go to OPs house, and teach her daughter “proper values.” The truth is, I just bought my son Tiro pants for sports at camp. I guess he (nor I) doesn’t really have proper values. Maybe could you come over here as well? Maybe we could organize a group class?

Never mind that he gets up on time during his summer vacation to go to shul, helps me around the house, and takes his little siblings to the park so I can rest. Oh, and he learns with a 3rd grade boy whose parents are divorced and father lives far away. You’re right. I should not “fargen” him these stupid Tiro pants, because wanting to fit in with your peers is a huge aveira. Hopefully he will learn that you need to fast on 3 consecutive Mondays and Thursdays for even dreaming of wanting to fit in. It’s very clear that he is lacking “proper values” and you’ll do a good job of reinforcing them.

Amother Teal— please go find someone else to bully.
Applause Applause
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joss3




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 3:50 pm
yksraya wrote:

Plastic drawers for clothing
(dd is not taking drawers as I don't think it's practical or that she needs it..


My first time camper wants to bring drawers but I’m not sure how to pack them.
Do I send the drawers filled as a piece of luggage? Or buy a massive duffel to put the drawers into?

Please advise Smile
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amother
Teal


 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 8:09 pm
SixOfWands wrote:
Because you don't think that they are?

A status item is just something that kids want. For my oldest (a boy), it was hockey tape. A whole roll costs less than $5, but its was highly prized by all. For girls, its often a tutu. Darned if I know why.

BTW, OP, forget status. Make sure you send a sealable plastic box for any junk food that you send. We've had the best luck with Sterlite.


No that’s not what a status item means. Do you know what the word status means?
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amother
Teal


 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 8:11 pm
ruchelbuckle wrote:
Great! Since you are clearly an expert in raising adolescents today, why don’t you step out from behind amother, go to OPs house, and teach her daughter “proper values.” The truth is, I just bought my son Tiro pants for sports at camp. I guess he (nor I) doesn’t really have proper values. Maybe could you come over here as well? Maybe we could organize a group class?

Never mind that he gets up on time during his summer vacation to go to shul, helps me around the house, and takes his little siblings to the park so I can rest. Oh, and he learns with a 3rd grade boy whose parents are divorced and father lives far away. You’re right. I should not “fargen” him these stupid Tiro pants, because wanting to fit in with your peers is a huge aveira. Hopefully he will learn that you need to fast on 3 consecutive Mondays and Thursdays for even dreaming of wanting to fit in. It’s very clear that he is lacking “proper values” and you’ll do a good job of reinforcing them.

Amother Teal— please go find someone else to bully.


Me thinks thou protests too much. Guilty conscience?
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amother
Lavender


 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 8:31 pm
sky wrote:
And do teen boys wear natives in camp?



Get him a pair of slides. Adidas are good.
I am a firm believer in helping your kids fit in if possible.
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ra_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 8:43 pm
joss3 wrote:
My first time camper wants to bring drawers but I’m not sure how to pack them.
Do I send the drawers filled as a piece of luggage? Or buy a massive duffel to put the drawers into?

Please advise Smile

Send drawers filled as a piece of luggage anf tape shut. If contents are private and the drawers are clear use some contact paper to line the drawers.
I'm still debating between clear drawers or fabric bins that fold flat and can be opened and filled when they get there.
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amother
Honeydew


 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 8:50 pm
Who knows about Camp Tubby specifically?
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sky




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 26 2019, 9:12 pm
amother [ Lavender ] wrote:
Get him a pair of slides. Adidas are good.
I am a firm believer in helping your kids fit in if possible.


Thank you! I saw this in another thread also so I guess that is what to get. Plus it’s cheaper. Smile.
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