Would you call to invite yourself?

amother

Wed, Jul 03 2019, 9:21 pm

dankbar wrote:

many people like to be on vacation & not host when they are on vacation

I 100% agree.
But why does somebody have to utter words out if their mouth if they don’t mean it? I did not hint or ask for the invite.

amother

Oak

Wed, Jul 03 2019, 9:57 pm

I agree with you, and I don't do it personally.
But for people who do, it's just making small talk. Maybe she didn't really have much to talk about when you ran into each other and this was just her attempt to chat and be social.

Cheiny

Wed, Jul 03 2019, 9:58 pm

amother [ OP ] wrote:

Our friends have a bungalow upstate and always tells us to call them when we want to come for Shabbos. Last year I called her and that weekend was not good for them. She never attemted to invite us for another weekend. And again this year her husband and her tell us to call which weekend we want to come. Would you call or just let it slide?

I have found that when people throw out a general “invitation” (if you can call it that) like, “Let us know when/ if you ever want to come for a meal,” that they really are just trying to seem polite but don’t really mean it. They know that the huge majority of people won’t feel comfortable doing that. If they were serious about wanting to have you, they’d call you and ask you specifically if you could come for whatever time...and the fact that they already turned you down and never attempted to have you at a different time should tell you all you need to know. Leave the ball in their court. If they really want to have you they’ll call to invite you.