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Are 5 Towns people more competitive ($), snooty than other a



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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:09 pm
We are looking for a new neighborhood to relocate. We were on central avenue, eating in pizza store and getting a feel for the area, and overheard conversations such as this which made me hesitate and get turned off.
First woman: Hi, haven’t seen you in a while.
Second woman: oh we just got back from our cruise.
First woman: oh we just went to the Bahamas...

And this went on and on. Other conversations when we were there for Shabbos centered around designer name skirts, the exotic flowers in the $150 Shabbos flower bouquet. Are most of the people so materialistic and showy?
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Einikel




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:11 pm
Pls change the thread title. It just sounds very condescending.
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amother
Jetblack


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:14 pm
I ate with a friend at an upscale place in the 5 towns the two mothers sitting near by let the 3 year old and four year olds kids run around with forks in their hands ,
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amother
White


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:15 pm
my friend moved to the 5 towns. she said there are definitely the fancy type but there are also the not as fancy type. Where in the five towns are you looking, different neighborhoods are also different.
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:16 pm
Einikel wrote:
Pls change the thread title. It just sounds very condescending.


It’s a question. A question isn’t condescending. I’m trying to get opinions.
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ectomorph




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:21 pm
I mean it would be lashon hara for anyone to agree with your op. Are you trying to elicit lashon hara?
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:22 pm
ectomorph wrote:
I mean it would be lashon hara for anyone to agree with your op. Are you trying to elicit lashon hara?


Yes, it's loshon harah as long as it's not about Lakewood Rolling Eyes .
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ectomorph




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:23 pm
amother [ cornflower ] wrote:
Yes, it's loshon harah as long as it's not about Lakewood Rolling Eyes .



The op would be lashon hara about lakewood too. Or any place
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amother
Babypink


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:24 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
We are looking for a new neighborhood to relocate. We were on central avenue, eating in pizza store and getting a feel for the area, and overheard conversations such as this which made me hesitate and get turned off.
First woman: Hi, haven’t seen you in a while.
Second woman: oh we just got back from our cruise.
First woman: oh we just went to the Bahamas...

And this went on and on. Other conversations when we were there for Shabbos centered around designer name skirts, the exotic flowers in the $150 Shabbos flower bouquet. Are most of the people so materialistic and showy?


Yes.

But that happens in some other materialistic frum areas too.
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Einikel




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:26 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
It’s a question. A question isn’t condescending. I’m trying to get opinions.


You can just phrase your question differently
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amother
cornflower


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:27 pm
ectomorph wrote:
I mean it would be lashon hara for anyone to agree with your op. Are you trying to elicit lashon hara?


Considering that there are endless amounts of threads bashing Lakewood....

Sure could have fooled me.
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ectomorph




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 6:59 pm
It's lashon hara to bash Lakewood as well.
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amother
Purple


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:08 pm
I don't think the conversation you overheard was bad. It could be you don't want to have neighbors who do things you can't afford but that's a different story. Many people who live there are rich so they do rich people things. And they usually have rich friends. It's no different than a conversation 2 women may have in the park after bein hazmanim where one went to Lancaster and one to NH. It's just on a much smaller scale because they have less money...

The (wealthy) people I know in the five towns are not competitve they just live a very different lifestyle than me.

That being said you can find PLENTY people not like that just make sure to move to the right neighborhood.
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amother
Ruby


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:10 pm
The title is lashon hara/ motzi shem ra and even phrasing it differently would probably be avak LH/ rechilus. I have no skin in the game and live nowhere near there, but this is the truth.
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amother
Puce


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:14 pm
The Five Towns has a reputation for a reason. Lived there for three years, those were most miserable three years of my life. If you're already concerned about those things, it doesn't sound like it's for you.
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amother
Apricot


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:21 pm
Plenty like that and plenty not like that. If you fit in financially, this shouldn't affect you. you'll just find your own type of friends. If you are " the poor one" then it will stress you out.
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amother
Periwinkle


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:33 pm
Hi. I lived there for close to 20 yrs before retiring to Florida. I am soooo not materialistic and have no clue or desire to dress upscale etc. I made some really great friends in the 5 towns whom I am still in touch. Some of these woman are not at all well off financially and some are. I know that there are some really down to earth young families in Cedarhurst. The people who bought our small woodmere house have not done a thing to it though it can use a painting. There are so many types that You find your own. Lawrence homes are more expensive for the most part but I also have some well to do very down to earth and not judgemental lawrence friends. There are so many shuls to choose from as well
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:40 pm
OP, I appreciate need for information but I opened this thread with the express intent to report it. I don't know how you can get the info you need but this thread is not it.
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amother
Cerise


 

Post Mon, Jul 08 2019, 7:45 pm
How
Does one get a thread shut down ? This is total lashon hara
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