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amother
OP


 

Post Sun, Sep 01 2019, 2:41 pm
Hi, I'm interested in finding out more about Baltimore.

1) A relative who lives there told me that no one makes it with two full-time working parents. Is that true? ETA: She meant that no one manages to have two full-time working parents because of the need for carpools, that all families have at least one parent with a flexible schedule. My question is if it's possible to live reasonably comfortably there with one parent working full-time and one parent working part-time.

2) If it's not, how much does a family of 4 need to earn in order to live without going paycheck-to-paycheck?

3) How much is babysitting out of the house? What about in-house?

4) Tell me about elementary schools for boys- we're middle-of-the-road yeshivish.

5) General pros and cons?

Thanks!
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amother
Wine


 

Post Sun, Sep 01 2019, 3:03 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Hi, I'm interested in finding out more about Baltimore.

1) A relative who lives there told me that no one makes it with two full-time working parents. Is that true?

2) If it's not, how much does a family of 4 need to earn in order to live without going paycheck-to-paycheck?

3) How much is babysitting out of the house? What about in-house?

4) Tell me about elementary schools for boys- we're middle-of-the-road yeshivish.

5) General pros and cons?

Thanks!

Re: a - what do you mean no one makes it with two full-time working parents? Is that a typo? My husband and I both work full-time. Do we live in Baltimore.
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Rubber Ducky




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Sep 01 2019, 3:17 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Hi, I'm interested in finding out more about Baltimore.

1) A relative who lives there told me that no one makes it with two full-time working parents. Is that true?

That doesn't sound right. Baltimore has more expensive and less expensive neighborhoods. Are they both making minimum wage?
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amother
Goldenrod


 

Post Sun, Sep 01 2019, 5:32 pm
That sounds wrong. The person who told you that must have been referring to her own experience struggling despite 2 full time incomes. My husband and I have 1 full time income and we are doing fine.
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amother
OP


 

Post Sun, Sep 01 2019, 10:04 pm
Edited my OP to clarify.
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amother
Goldenrod


 

Post Sun, Sep 01 2019, 10:27 pm
Having 1 parent with a flex sched definitely makes it easier but it can be done without. Fill-in camps, nannies, and leave time can all be used (or unpaid leave if able).
You need to add up your expenses and income, no one here can do that for you
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amother
Amber


 

Post Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:24 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Hi, I'm interested in finding out more about Baltimore.

1) A relative who lives there told me that no one makes it with two full-time working parents. Is that true? ETA: She meant that no one manages to have two full-time working parents because of the need for carpools, that all families have at least one parent with a flexible schedule. My question is if it's possible to live reasonably comfortably there with one parent working full-time and one parent working part-time.

2) If it's not, how much does a family of 4 need to earn in order to live without going paycheck-to-paycheck?

3) How much is babysitting out of the house? What about in-house?

4) Tell me about elementary schools for boys- we're middle-of-the-road yeshivish.

5) General pros and cons?

Thanks!


1. most of the people I know have two working parents, one full time and one part time. If you don't have a parent available during carpool hours, you can pay for someone else to drive your kids for about 60$ a month.
2. mesila told us a family with four kids needs 140k a year. We use less than that and have three kids.
3. in house 10-12$ an hour out of house 6-7$ a hour
4. TA is the frum not yeshivish big school, been around longest. TI is the yeshivish boys school, also big and serious, long hours. Darchei Noam is a Montessori school that is fantastic and smaller (honestly, this school alone is worth the move!). Toras Simcha is another new one that is smaller and also mainstream and I know a lot of people are happy with it.
5. I love Baltimore because it is established and has the perks of a big city (clothes stores, shul options, kosher groceries, school options etc), but also has the warm out of town feel that no one really cares what you are wearing and people are generally pretty open minded and accepting--not as segregated into 'types'.
cons--has some super hot and super cold weather.
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amother
OP


 

Post Sun, Sep 01 2019, 11:30 pm
amother [ Amber ] wrote:
1. most of the people I know have two working parents, one full time and one part time. If you don't have a parent available during carpool hours, you can pay for someone else to drive your kids for about 60$ a month.
2. mesila told us a family with four kids needs 140k a year. We use less than that and have three kids.
3. in house 10-12$ an hour out of house 6-7$ a hour
4. TA is the frum not yeshivish big school, been around longest. TI is the yeshivish boys school, also big and serious, long hours. Darchei Noam is a Montessori school that is fantastic and smaller (honestly, this school alone is worth the move!). Toras Simcha is another new one that is smaller and also mainstream and I know a lot of people are happy with it.
5. I love Baltimore because it is established and has the perks of a big city (clothes stores, shul options, kosher groceries, school options etc), but also has the warm out of town feel that no one really cares what you are wearing and people are generally pretty open minded and accepting--not as segregated into 'types'.
cons--has some super hot and super cold weather.


1. $60 a month both ways for all kids?

2. $140K a year with 4 kids? Is that while owning a house? Isn't tuition there very high? (I heard $9K for nursery!)

3. In house is 10-12 hour? Is that for frum babysitter?

4. Thanks for the breakdown.

5. That's kind of one of the reasons we're interested in Baltimore.

Question: When a young couple with a couple of kids (yeshivish but DH works) moves in, how would they go about making friends/getting integrated in the community? Which shul(s) would work best?

And what is the job market like? Are jobs available more locally or does everyone go to DC for corporate?
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Rubber Ducky




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Sep 02 2019, 12:09 am
amother [ Amber ] wrote:
4. Darchei Noam is a Montessori school that is fantastic and smaller (honestly, this school alone is worth the move!). Toras Simcha is another new one that is smaller and also mainstream and I know a lot of people are happy with it.
Wonderful DDIL teaches there and 3 of my grand-ducklings are there — this is a real Montessori and an excellent school!

amother [ Amber ] wrote:
5. I love Baltimore because it is established and has the perks of a big city (clothes stores, shul options, kosher groceries, school options etc), but also has the warm out of town feel that no one really cares what you are wearing and people are generally pretty open minded and accepting--not as segregated into 'types'.
cons--has some super hot and super cold weather.

Non-Jewish Baltimore gets (and unfortunately deserves) some really bad press, but this is a wonderful city to live in if you're frum. Very live-and-let-live accepting attitude, and for the most part people work together for the betterment of the community.
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Sep 02 2019, 1:21 pm
Bump, any other imas in Baltimore who can add info?
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aussie2




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Sep 02 2019, 7:30 pm
In terms of paying s/o to drive your kids to school. It's generally $60 each way per child as far as I know..
In terms of $9k tuition, the 'official' tuition costs are very high but a big majority gets some sort of reduction.. (I could be wrong about..others can chime in.)
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amother
OP


 

Post Mon, Sep 02 2019, 7:40 pm
aussie2 wrote:
In terms of paying s/o to drive your kids to school. It's generally $60 each way per child as far as I know..
In terms of $9k tuition, the 'official' tuition costs are very high but a big majority gets some sort of reduction.. (I could be wrong about..others can chime in.)


$120 a month per child for both ways can add up pretty fast, but it's still not more than I'm paying right now.

About tuition, I know that people are most likely getting some sort of break. My question is, do schools automatically think that you can afford full tuition just because both parents work full-time?

In Brooklyn, from what I can tell, people pay significantly less than the official "full" tuition. I always wondered how breaks work out of town. I can't imagine being able to afford $10K+ per child per year, even with two full-time professional salaries.
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amother
Crimson


 

Post Mon, Sep 02 2019, 8:04 pm
I am paying way more than $60/way/kid for TI elementary

Last edited by amother on Mon, Sep 02 2019, 10:49 pm; edited 1 time in total
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amother
Cerulean


 

Post Mon, Sep 02 2019, 10:20 pm
I agree it does add up fast.. just putting it out there that you shouldn't neccesarily say I can't take a certain job bec I need to drive carpool.. there are other options and you should figure out what makes most sense for you.

In terms of breaks not sure about e/ school but in general I think they have forms that ask pretty detailed ques about income & expenses so they won't automatically assume u don't need a break based on the fact that there is a dual income.
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amother
Gray


 

Post Tue, Sep 03 2019, 10:33 am
My husband and I both work full time and manage carpool just fine, as do many of my friends who also work full time. Our jobs are both within 10-15 minutes of all schools and our house, so I guess with a longer commute it may be more difficult, but we work real office jobs (I.e. are not teachers) and I have never paid a driver to take my kids. You may need to be a little creative with the scheduling, but it's definitely doable - drive extra mornings and still get to work on time and not have to worry about afternoon drives, or if you have boys in school on Sunday enter a 6 person carpool and drive Sundays, etc. I have been driving carpools for over 15 years and it's really not a terrible as the kvetchers make it out to be Very Happy
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amother
Mauve


 

Post Tue, Sep 03 2019, 1:28 pm
My husband and I both work full-time. Some of my children have taken the bus to/from school. For some of my children we carpooled and we worked out the drives (Sundays, mornings, later afternoon drives). We worked it out.

The schools give tuition breaks based on the forms that you fill out. We do reasonablly well BH, but our tuition costs are high. We do qualify for tuition breaks.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Sep 03 2019, 5:53 pm
amother [ Mauve ] wrote:
My husband and I both work full-time. Some of my children have taken the bus to/from school. For some of my children we carpooled and we worked out the drives (Sundays, mornings, later afternoon drives). We worked it out.

The schools give tuition breaks based on the forms that you fill out. We do reasonablly well BH, but our tuition costs are high. We do qualify for tuition breaks.


Isn't the public transportation in Baltimore very dangerous?
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Sep 03 2019, 5:54 pm
amother [ Gray ] wrote:
My husband and I both work full time and manage carpool just fine, as do many of my friends who also work full time. Our jobs are both within 10-15 minutes of all schools and our house, so I guess with a longer commute it may be more difficult, but we work real office jobs (I.e. are not teachers) and I have never paid a driver to take my kids. You may need to be a little creative with the scheduling, but it's definitely doable - drive extra mornings and still get to work on time and not have to worry about afternoon drives, or if you have boys in school on Sunday enter a 6 person carpool and drive Sundays, etc. I have been driving carpools for over 15 years and it's really not a terrible as the kvetchers make it out to be Very Happy


You are lucky that you both have such short commutes. Even so, don't the playgroups start at 9? How do you manage with getting younger kids to and from their groups?
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amother
Wine


 

Post Tue, Sep 03 2019, 6:43 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
You are lucky that you both have such short commutes. Even so, don't the playgroups start at 9? How do you manage with getting younger kids to and from their groups?

Another two spouse full time working family here, in Baltimore.

When my kids are “playgroup” age, I don't send to the options with hours that don't work for me. Playgroup is for SAHM or part time working moms. The rest of us need actual daycare. Babysitters, etc.

I work downtown and my husband works in the community. Its hard but many of us do it everyday. I work from 7:30-3:30 downtown and my husband works from 8:30-6:30 in the frum area. We make it work.
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amother
Amber


 

Post Tue, Sep 03 2019, 8:31 pm
Darchei Noam tuition is significantly lower than the other schools (about half) but everyone pays full tuition. There is a goverment rebate on top of that if you qualify. (daycare 5k, elementry 8k)
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