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Teshuva done right



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chasdie Hashem




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Sep 21 2019, 11:53 pm
What’s the right way to do teshuva ?
Not just what we learn in school...but really to say every sin we did is unfortunately impossible to remember (charata)-for s/o who does x make e/ so often cheshbon hanefesh:(
Other than writing down alphabet with all kiddos & going through e one...is this” ocd “?
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dankbar




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Sep 22 2019, 12:46 am
I think al cheit covers all sins, charata & vidui
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Sep 22 2019, 8:26 am
chasdie Hashem wrote:
What’s the right way to do teshuva ?
Not just what we learn in school...but really to say every sin we did is unfortunately impossible to remember (charata)-for s/o who does x make e/ so often cheshbon hanefesh:(
Other than writing down alphabet with all kiddos & going through e one...is this” ocd “?


Is this for you or to do with the kids?
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chasdie Hashem




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Sep 22 2019, 9:07 am
Me:)
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chasdie Hashem




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Sep 22 2019, 9:08 am
Tnx dankbar-
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Sep 23 2019, 10:03 am
chasdie Hashem wrote:
Me:)


A few things:
EVERYONE talks about kabalos. And EVERYONE who talks about kabalos says, start small. As someone - the Chazon Ish? - said, make a kabala. A small one. Now cut it in half. That's your kabala.
Yes, it's a serious time. But think about Hashem loves you and shows you this love. Work on thanking Him, often, through the day.
When you daven, ask Him to let these words get into your bones so you really feel them.
Think about Hashem as King.
Think about what relationships you need to repair and take steps to do it. Yes, if there is someone you think you wronged, ask mechila. Of course, no, "areyoumochelme/ifIdidanythingtohurtyou" etc.

I hope this is a start.
Phew, if I do everything on this list I'll be good ;-D
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Amalia




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Sep 23 2019, 11:08 am
PinkFridge wrote:
A few things:
EVERYONE talks about kabalos. And EVERYONE who talks about kabalos says, start small. As someone - the Chazon Ish? - said, make a kabala. A small one. Now cut it in half. That's your kabala.
Yes, it's a serious time. But think about Hashem loves you and shows you this love. Work on thanking Him, often, through the day.
When you daven, ask Him to let these words get into your bones so you really feel them.
Think about Hashem as King.
Think about what relationships you need to repair and take steps to do it. Yes, if there is someone you think you wronged, ask mechila. Of course, no, "areyoumochelme/ifIdidanythingtohurtyou" etc.

I hope this is a start.
Phew, if I do everything on this list I'll be good ;-D


Thank you, chasdeihashem, for starting this thread. (Although why in the miscellaneous section?)

And thank you, PinkFridge, for your reply!
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chasdie Hashem




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Sep 23 2019, 11:55 am
Thanks sharing your thoughts!& thanking Hashem was my goal last 2 years-& boy does it make a difference!& such nachas to hear my younger daughter thanking Hashem ...Bh-Hashem should help further...
& y this miscellanies section-was too lazy to read through all titles to get to right one:)
Shana Tovah to all!
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Flip Flops




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Sep 23 2019, 12:00 pm
Many people ask, "who am I fooling, Hashem knows I will definitely sin again. I can't possibly say I'll never do it again, when I could barely even remember all I've done."
Hashem just wants to see that we are going in the right direction. We have to show Hashem that we truly want to be good and that we are working on ourselves. This can be with a tiny kabbalah that we can really stick to. It doesn't mean turning over your life because that won't last. Then on Yom Kippur we say vidduy which will include all aveiros we may have done.
I like to write things down. I have a notebook that I keep for this purpose and I write a page once a year, before Rosh Hashana. Something like this:
Things that I improved this year:
Things that need improvement:
Kabbalos for this year:
etc.
I look over the previous years pages and it is a very honest way to see where I'm holding and how I did on the previous kabbalos. I can also look at the paper throughout the year to
see what I wrote.
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Sep 23 2019, 5:40 pm
Flip Flops wrote:
Many people ask, "who am I fooling, Hashem knows I will definitely sin again. I can't possibly say I'll never do it again, when I could barely even remember all I've done."
Hashem just wants to see that we are going in the right direction. We have to show Hashem that we truly want to be good and that we are working on ourselves..


This is how one speaker I heard put it.
It's like the dieter who knows it's not going to last. And for some reason there's a piece of cake in the fridge that he can't put down the garbage disposal. So he goes for an hour...two hours...ultimately he eats it. But last time, he caved after 15 minutes. This time he was able to go longer. Obviously he's been building spiritual muscles and kol hakavod!
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Amalia




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Sep 23 2019, 5:52 pm
Flip Flops wrote:
Many people ask, "who am I fooling, Hashem knows I will definitely sin again. I can't possibly say I'll never do it again, when I could barely even remember all I've done."
Hashem just wants to see that we are going in the right direction. We have to show Hashem that we truly want to be good and that we are working on ourselves. This can be with a tiny kabbalah that we can really stick to. It doesn't mean turning over your life because that won't last. Then on Yom Kippur we say vidduy which will include all aveiros we may have done.
I like to write things down. I have a notebook that I keep for this purpose and I write a page once a year, before Rosh Hashana. Something like this:
Things that I improved this year:
Things that need improvement:
Kabbalos for this year:
etc.
I look over the previous years pages and it is a very honest way to see where I'm holding and how I did on the previous kabbalos. I can also look at the paper throughout the year to
see what I wrote.


Dear Flip Flops,

The notebook is a great idea! Thank you! It’s very impressive that you have this regimen of spiritual self-examination, and even more so, that’s it’s from year to year: usually, good resolutions fade away over weeks, if not days, as every dieter knows.
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Flip Flops




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Sep 23 2019, 6:18 pm
Amalia wrote:
Dear Flip Flops,

The notebook is a great idea! Thank you! It’s very impressive that you have this regimen of spiritual self-examination, and even more so, that’s it’s from year to year: usually, good resolutions fade away over weeks, if not days, as every dieter knows.


I got the idea from a 12th grade teacher, and I loved it. We asked her, how do we "do" teshuva? This is what she told us. It takes something so abstract and makes it concrete.
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