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If your parents/in laws paid down payment on house...
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Sebastian




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:04 pm
I just saw you don't drive. I'm sorry OP but that's a HUGE limitation in Lakewood. I don't understand why chassidim are moving somewhere where you NEED to drive.

I agree with your father. I'm sorry.
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amother
Blush


 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:05 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
he says there's no property in the front or back, no resale value, the back deck is old and rotten, it's an old house with repairs needed for a hefty price. he doesn't feel it's worth the price and feel it's painful to spend so much money on such a house even if there's nothing better available. He says you don't spend half a million dollars bec there's nothing else and you don't make such a major decision just bec you want to be close walking distance to certain shuls etc.
he says the owners will get our money and laugh all the way to the bank while they build themselves a brand new mansion.


Im a born and bred lkwd girl. I just wanted to say its painful to read your posts on this thread 😣
"Laughing all the way to the bank" ?!?! They are going to move further out which youre not willing to do. You too can get more bang for your buck but youre choosing location..
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:05 pm
watergirl wrote:
A townhouse is perfectly wonderful. ESPECIALLY if your family is how you are describing. Perspective!


So basically you're giving me the same message. Just accept what you can bec you can't get more. But I want more, especially for so much money. I have zero cheshek to move into someone else's old lived in outdated home. For that, I can stay where I am.
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amother
Cobalt


 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:06 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
No, it's not the only reason, although his negativity did put a huge damper on me. I was never crazy over it. It's an old townhouse with no property and costing a lot of money, plus would need at least 30k in renovations to make it look nice. I don't feel it's worth so much money, yet that's the going price now and not going to get anything better. It's just painful for me, I would love a new fresh house but can't afford one in the area I want and even in the areas I don't want, it's still very expensive. I feel I deserve better.


What did you do to deserve better?
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:06 pm
amother [ Blush ] wrote:
Im a born and bred lkwd girl. I just wanted to say its painful to read your posts on this thread 😣
"Laughing all the way to the bank" ?!?! They are going to move further out which youre not willing to do. You too can get more bang for your buck but youre choosing location..


Actually they're building in a prime area, but are just able to afford what we can't. But I didn't say that, he did. Now you see with all this negativity instilled, why it created such a damper? I try not to let what my parents say/think get to me but this is major and it's with their money.
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amother
Aquamarine


 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:07 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
he says there's no property in the front or back, no resale value, the back deck is old and rotten, it's an old house with repairs needed for a hefty price. he doesn't feel it's worth the price and feel it's painful to spend so much money on such a house even if there's nothing better available. He says you don't spend half a million dollars bec there's nothing else and you don't make such a major decision just bec you want to be close walking distance to certain shuls etc.
he says the owners will get our money and laugh all the way to the bank while they build themselves a brand new mansion.


These are all very true concerns, but based on your limitations, it sounds like you may not have many other options. (Is it Sterling Forest? If so, look at the bright side: you're near lots of other developments, tons of new shopping in walking distance, and a lot of families who are similar to yours and in a similar stage of life, from what I can tell.)

It seems that you'll just need an attitude shift at this point.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:07 pm
amother [ Cobalt ] wrote:
What did you do to deserve better?


Work full time for the past 20 years to pay my basic bills!!!
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amother
Cobalt


 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:08 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
So basically you're giving me the same message. Just accept what you can bec you can't get more. But I want more, especially for so much money. I have zero cheshek to move into someone else's old lived in outdated home. For that, I can stay where I am.


Its not even your money??

Its a bit rich to complain that someone else's money isn't going far enough.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:08 pm
Sebastian wrote:
I just saw you don't drive. I'm sorry OP but that's a HUGE limitation in Lakewood. I don't understand why chassidim are moving somewhere where you NEED to drive.

I agree with your father. I'm sorry.



Actually I've been here all along so never moved here.
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Sebastian




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:08 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
So basically you're giving me the same message. Just accept what you can bec you can't get more. But I want more, especially for so much money. I have zero cheshek to move into someone else's old lived in outdated home. For that, I can stay where I am.


The newer homes are further away. You want somewhere where you don't need to drive. In a town like Lakewood it is an enormous limitation.

If you would consider living further out, there are townhouses in Chateau Park and Sterling Forest with townhouses for sale in the 300s. There are chassidim there and the home are in newer condition. There is shopping close by also.
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groovy1224




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:08 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
So basically you're giving me the same message. Just accept what you can bec you can't get more. But I want more, especially for so much money. I have zero cheshek to move into someone else's old lived in outdated home. For that, I can stay where I am.


But you want something that doesn't exist. You want a new, 4-5 bedroom home in a specific area in your price range. If they don't exist, they don't exist.

If you have zero cheshek, then why are you even considering it? Are you hoping prices will go down?
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:08 pm
Sebastian wrote:
The newer homes are further away. You want somewhere where you don't need to drive. In a town like Lakewood it is an enormous limitation.

If you would consider living further out, there are townhouses in Chateau Park and Sterling Forest with townhouses for sale in the 300s. There are chassidim there and the home are in newer condition. There is shopping close by also.


We actually considered those areas as they're not so far way off but we saw house in Chateau Park that was absolutely horrible on the inside, I couldn't wait to run out of there.
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Sebastian




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:11 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
We actually considered those areas as they're not so far way off but we saw house in Chateau Park that was absolutely horrible on the inside, I couldn't wait to run out of there.


there are many homes for sale in the area. I would look around more. Just b/c one was bad, doesn't mean they all are. Also if you spend in the 300s, you may have more money to update the home.
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amother
Blue


 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:12 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
We actually considered those areas as they're not so far way off but we saw house in Chateau Park that was absolutely horrible on the inside, I couldn't wait to run out of there.


Just want to say, I grew up in a development. Some of my parents' friends really did nice things with their homes, with wallpaper, flooring, paintings, furniture, planting outside... you can create your own oasis.
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watergirl




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:15 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
So basically you're giving me the same message. Just accept what you can bec you can't get more. But I want more, especially for so much money. I have zero cheshek to move into someone else's old lived in outdated home. For that, I can stay where I am.

Yeah, then I guess I am giving you the same message. ALL homes, other than these new ones, are "someone else's old lived in home" for crying out loud! Other than these silly new construction things that are a strange phenomenon that seems to exist only in Lakewood and maybe Monsey. The rest of the world (and the frum world) is somehow able to understand what you refuse to get - we ALL buy previously lived in homes.

Accept what you can because you cant get more - its true! If you have $10, you can only spend $10. Are you reading what you are writing?

You want more but you admit you can not afford more. So you cant have more - YET. IYH one day you can! But that day is not now.

If you truly are the simple type you claim you are, you would be able to understand where you are in life and be happy with it. A dichotomy exists for you it seems. I hear that! Sometimes we want what is out of our reach.

Zero cheshek to move into someone else's "old lived in outdated home", if that is all you can afford, is a sign. A massive red flashing sign that you are not ready for home-ownership yet.

Your limitations are self made. You can HAVE the "more" you want, but you have put limits on yourselves. So you have a choice to make.

"Just accept what you can bec you can't get more" is a real thing. Its called life!
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watergirl




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:17 pm
amother [ OP ] wrote:
Work full time for the past 20 years to pay my basic bills!!!


Would you be able to pay your basic bills once you own a home?
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Sebastian




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:18 pm
watergirl wrote:
Yeah, then I guess I am giving you the same message. ALL homes, other than these new ones, are "someone else's old lived in home" for crying out loud! Other than these silly new construction things that are a strange phenomenon that seems to exist only in Lakewood and maybe Monsey. The rest of the world (and the frum world) is somehow able to understand what you refuse to get - we ALL buy previously lived in homes.

Accept what you can because you cant get more - its true! If you have $10, you can only spend $10. Are you reading what you are writing?

You want more but you admit you can not afford more. So you cant have more - YET. IYH one day you can! But that day is not now.

If you truly are the simple type you claim you are, you would be able to understand where you are in life and be happy with it. A dichotomy exists for you it seems. I hear that! Sometimes we want what is out of our reach.

Zero cheshek to move into someone else's "old lived in outdated home", if that is all you can afford, is a sign. A massive red flashing sign that you are not ready for home-ownership yet.

Your limitations are self made. You can HAVE the "more" you want, but you have put limits on yourselves. So you have a choice to make.

"Just accept what you can bec you can't get more" is a real thing. Its called life!


she can get a nicer home a little further out. I know the area she's talking about, the houses are really dumpy, I don't blame her for being upset.
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watergirl




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:19 pm
Sebastian wrote:
she can get a nicer home a little further out. I know the area she's talking about, the houses are really dumpy, I don't blame her for being upset.


But they have placed a limitation on her area. So she can afford only this. Or she can wait. Or she can chose another area. But she wont. So, this is what she can afford.
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groovy1224




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:24 pm
watergirl wrote:
Yeah, then I guess I am giving you the same message. ALL homes, other than these new ones, are "someone else's old lived in home" for crying out loud! Other than these silly new construction things that are a strange phenomenon that seems to exist only in Lakewood and maybe Monsey. The rest of the world (and the frum world) is somehow able to understand what you refuse to get - we ALL buy previously lived in homes.

Accept what you can because you cant get more - its true! If you have $10, you can only spend $10. Are you reading what you are writing?

You want more but you admit you can not afford more. So you cant have more - YET. IYH one day you can! But that day is not now.

If you truly are the simple type you claim you are, you would be able to understand where you are in life and be happy with it. A dichotomy exists for you it seems. I hear that! Sometimes we want what is out of our reach.

Zero cheshek to move into someone else's "old lived in outdated home", if that is all you can afford, is a sign. A massive red flashing sign that you are not ready for home-ownership yet.

Your limitations are self made. You can HAVE the "more" you want, but you have put limits on yourselves. So you have a choice to make.

"Just accept what you can bec you can't get more" is a real thing. Its called life!


Totally agree.

Op I really get you, we live in a very expensive area and weren't willing to move outward because we love it here. Which meant we had to settle A LOT when we bought our home. It's smaller than we wanted, and some other features we didn't love but we were adamant on the area, had a strict budget, so we had to deal.

Is it mind boggling to me when I see an adorable newlywed couple moving in to a 750K home? You bet, but it has nothing to do with me.

If you are set on one area, set on your budget, something's gonna have to give.
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amother
OP


 

Post Tue, Sep 24 2019, 12:25 pm
watergirl wrote:
Would you be able to pay your basic bills once you own a home?


hopefully!
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