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Forum -> Household Management
I’m the worst cook!!
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amother
OP


 

Post Sat, Oct 19 2019, 5:49 pm
Cooking and baking seriously stress me out!!! I feel like I’m the only frum lady who is not a pro at whipping up huge meals for shabbos and yom tov. Not only that, I really dislike doing it. We do a ton of take-out for side dishes (potato kugal, etc) and even soups and desserts we usually buy. I basically know how to make roast chicken, chicken cutlets, rice, and some veggie side dishes. And even those things stress me out!!! And I even ruin them sometimes by overcooking when I get side tracked by my young kids! We still eat out most meals by parents or in laws and we get invited out to friends too. Always makes me feel so sad about myself when I see friends of mine, my age or even much younger, who are such wonderful cooks. Dh loves to host and it causes me so much stress that I rarely agree to it. Like prob around 3 times a year. Night meals on yom tov consist of baked ziti and some other bought side dishes. I feel like I’m never going to be a “balanusta” like every other frum woman on this planet. Makes me feel so awful about myself Crying
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amother
Brown


 

Post Sat, Oct 19 2019, 5:55 pm
I feel like I wrote this post...
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Yummymummy3




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Oct 19 2019, 6:10 pm
Are there cooking classes in your area?
We learned cookery in school but we didn't learn many practical shabbos foods.
Good luck with it. I wish I could come and put on a whole load of food for you all to enjoy and I'd do it side by side with you and demonstrate some tips. I only cook easy foods.
Pm me if you live in England and I'd gladly come over if you live nearby but I highly doubt that you do.
Good luck with it all.
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ra_mom




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Oct 19 2019, 6:42 pm
When I was a new cook I loved the cookbook called Quick & Kosher from the Bride Who Knew Nothing. The recipes were so clear and they all came out great. From cooking other people's recipes I learned some new techniques too eventually.
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amother
Ecru


 

Post Sat, Oct 19 2019, 6:52 pm
Not to distress you, but is this humblebrag week at imamother? Are we all trying to outdo each other with proof of how deplorable our domestic skills are? We already had “I’m the worst housekeeper” and now “I’m the worst cook.” Should I chime in and say I’m the worst at dressmaking or doing hair and makeup? I do believe I have the worst wash machine, it leaves things looking dirtier than when they went in, but I can’t take personal credit for that.

You do know that excessive self-denigration is a sign, not of humility but of gaivah, right?
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Oct 19 2019, 7:33 pm
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
Not to distress you, but is this humblebrag week at imamother? Are we all trying to outdo each other with proof of how deplorable our domestic skills are? We already had “I’m the worst housekeeper” and now “I’m the worst cook.” Should I chime in and say I’m the worst at dressmaking or doing hair and makeup? I do believe I have the worst wash machine, it leaves things looking dirtier than when they went in, but I can’t take personal credit for that.

You do know that excessive self-denigration is a sign, not of humility but of gaivah, right?


What a weird response!
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tichellady




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Oct 19 2019, 7:35 pm
You are fine just the way you are. No reason you can’t get take out or have your husband cook. Not even needs to be a chef. I happen to be a good cook and like food but even I get sick of cooking and food prep during this holiday season
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amother
Honeydew


 

Post Sat, Oct 19 2019, 7:38 pm
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
Not to distress you, but is this humblebrag week at imamother? Are we all trying to outdo each other with proof of how deplorable our domestic skills are? We already had “I’m the worst housekeeper” and now “I’m the worst cook.” Should I chime in and say I’m the worst at dressmaking or doing hair and makeup? I do believe I have the worst wash machine, it leaves things looking dirtier than when they went in, but I can’t take personal credit for that.

You do know that excessive self-denigration is a sign, not of humility but of gaivah, right?


Did it ever occur to you that the title and posting style of this thread was a satire of the other one?

OP may have meant to start a post about this anyway, but chose the exaggerated thread title due to the housekeeping thread.

Chill.
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amother
Beige


 

Post Sat, Oct 19 2019, 7:41 pm
Sounds hard but also sounds like you really want to learn! I found that some recipes I would love to make and didn't know how so I'd go onto YouTube to get an idea of how it should be done and it helped. Like stuffed chicken, how do I get the stuff inside to stay? You tube and I was all set
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amother
Mustard


 

Post Sat, Oct 19 2019, 7:56 pm
tichellady wrote:
You are fine just the way you are. No reason you can’t get take out or have your husband cook. Not even needs to be a chef. I happen to be a good cook and like food but even I get sick of cooking and food prep during this holiday season

I’m in same boat as you OP.
I try not to feel bad about it. I’m good at other things and I’m sure So are you.
DH is actually worse in the kitchen than I am. Literally called me once to ask how to make scrambled eggs.
During the year we manage with simple suppers. (Think spaghetti and cheese , lasagna)
For yomtov I used to stress like crazy but no more. I stock up the freezer with whatever I managed in the two wks leading up to Yom Tov (I could cook, like you OP, it’s just very tiring and many things I don’t know how to make and I’m just not ‘good at it’ ) So the rest I order.
I found a local caterer that cooks very homemade style and homemade tasting.
We had a gorgeous yomtov so far.
I hate when guests ask how I made something (hello I didn’t make it!!) but that’s for another spinoff thread... I should title it: pls don’t ask your host too many questions about the food she serves!! 😝
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allthingsblue




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Oct 19 2019, 7:56 pm
I'm not a complicated cook. I basically only use easy recipes.
I love kosher.com.
Some easy ideas:
Shnitzel (egg cutlets, bread them in Jason's flavored crumbs, fry each side until golden, then bake for a few minutes.)
Meatballs (form balls- ground beef, egg, bread crumbs, ketchup. Pour 1jar each of cranberry sauce and tomato sauce in pot; bring to boil. Drop balls into sauce. Summer, covered, for an hour-hour and a half depending on size of parties)
Roasted chicken: so many variations.

Slow roasted with garlic and onions

Drizzled with honey, lemon juice, olive oil, dried herbs such as rosemary parsley and dill; garlic gloves; set timer on oven so you don't forfet. 375, 45 min covered 45 min uncovered

Sesame chicken on the bone

Duck sauce chicken on the bone

Brisket: slice onions and garlic and put into pan, place 2nd cut brisket on top, smear meat with Montreal steak seasoning and brown sugar and olive
Oil, bake covered at 325 for 3 hrs.

Follow mykitchenmystudio on Instagram for delicious simple recipes. Just made her green beans, lamb roast and pear apple bake- all delicious and super simple. Follow instructions to the T.

Also easy: chicken nuggets. Cut cutlets into nuggets. Dip into egg, then cornflake crumbs. Drizzle with honey. Bake at 375 for around 20 minutes (cut nugget open to make sure it's not pink inside.)

Salmon: so easy! Just sprinkle with garlic lemon juice salt pepper and olive oil and bake at 400 for 20 min.
Or pour on Teriyaki sauce or make your own using soy sauce, garlic, and honey.

Happy to help you find easy recipes!
I never ever Patchke but my food thankfully comes out good!
I gets lots of tips and recipes from imamother.
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amother
OP


 

Post Sat, Oct 19 2019, 9:47 pm
Yummymummy3 wrote:
Are there cooking classes in your area?
We learned cookery in school but we didn't learn many practical shabbos foods.
Good luck with it. I wish I could come and put on a whole load of food for you all to enjoy and I'd do it side by side with you and demonstrate some tips. I only cook easy foods.
Pm me if you live in England and I'd gladly come over if you live nearby but I highly doubt that you do.
Good luck with it all.


So funny cuz this is exactly what I wish someone would do with me!!! Not in England unfortunately but wow your so sweet!!!
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mamaleh




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Oct 20 2019, 12:59 am
amother [ OP ] wrote:
So funny cuz this is exactly what I wish someone would do with me!!! Not in England unfortunately but wow your so sweet!!!

I’ll gladly do it if you are in or near Lakewood.
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amother
Plum


 

Post Sun, Oct 20 2019, 1:19 am
Yummymummy3, what was the first thing you made in school do you remember? For me it was an omelette. But I was cooking way before then, from about 9 yrs old and cooking well. I loved Home Ec, we had a pensioner lunch club at our school 5 days a week and it was the Home Ec students that cooked for them, happy days! That's where I learned how to make soups. The teacher was a bit nuts and always nipping out for a cigarette but it was such fun, I'm smiling at the memories Very Happy
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Yummymummy3




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Oct 20 2019, 1:48 am
amother [ Plum ] wrote:
Yummymummy3, what was the first thing you made in school do you remember? For me it was an omelette. But I was cooking way before then, from about 9 yrs old and cooking well. I loved Home Ec, we had a pensioner lunch club at our school 5 days a week and it was the Home Ec students that cooked for them, happy days! That's where I learned how to make soups. The teacher was a bit nuts and always nipping out for a cigarette but it was such fun, I'm smiling at the memories Very Happy

I remember exactly what it was. A weird salad that no one would eat. Had apples, nuts and cabbage with coleslaw dressing. Gross.
When I was around 15 a guest asked me to make her a scrambled egg and she laughed so hard that I had no clue how to do it. I laugh now at the cooking memories too. I thought I'd never learn.
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amother
Plum


 

Post Sun, Oct 20 2019, 1:58 am
Hahaha I remember making that too! And jam, we made literally gallons of jam but only got a teeny pot to take home. I think the teacher was selling it at fetes or something lol. Really we churned out so much raspberry jam for her, it was like a production line LOL
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amother
Periwinkle


 

Post Sun, Oct 20 2019, 5:49 am
amother [ Ecru ] wrote:
Not to distress you, but is this humblebrag week at imamother? Are we all trying to outdo each other with proof of how deplorable our domestic skills are? We already had “I’m the worst housekeeper” and now “I’m the worst cook.” Should I chime in and say I’m the worst at dressmaking or doing hair and makeup? I do believe I have the worst wash machine, it leaves things looking dirtier than when they went in, but I can’t take personal credit for that.

You do know that excessive self-denigration is a sign, not of humility but of gaivah, right?


Huh? She obviously feels very bad about herself and this is something that bothers her! Can’t figure out why you would make a person already beating herself up fell worse
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amother
Fuchsia


 

Post Sun, Oct 20 2019, 5:56 am
I love kosher.com and my cook books
Practice making one new recipe every week but don’t do it at a time that your stressed
On a Sunday or week night
Maybe do this together with your husband or friend as a weekly activity
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Oct 23 2019, 12:08 pm
Big hugs!
Somewhere in the last 30ish years I became I competent cook and baker because believe me, I knew less than nothing when I started.

I hope this makes you smile:
https://www.gocomics.com/pearl.....01/31
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Raisin




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Oct 23 2019, 12:34 pm
amother [ Plum ] wrote:
Yummymummy3, what was the first thing you made in school do you remember? For me it was an omelette. But I was cooking way before then, from about 9 yrs old and cooking well. I loved Home Ec, we had a pensioner lunch club at our school 5 days a week and it was the Home Ec students that cooked for them, happy days! That's where I learned how to make soups. The teacher was a bit nuts and always nipping out for a cigarette but it was such fun, I'm smiling at the memories Very Happy


I also learnt cooking in school. (Do all english schools do that or did we all go to the same school?) I only remember some of the stuff we made - Babaganous, vegetarian shepherds pie using that pareve mince. No jam.

But honestly I learnt to cook by following recipes in cookbooks. I started cooking for my family while a teenager but I think I had 2 or 3 recipes in my repertoire. After I got married and started making shabbos I had to cook. No parents nearby (or eruv) and pretty soon I was hosting big crowds each week. I still mostly follow recipes although some I know by heart and some stuff I make up.

Nowadays you can get so much ready made things like frozen chopped onions and veggies and herbs anb pie crusts and mixes of all sorts so it shouldn't be time consuming.

Don't stress about buying take out. And you can still invite guests if you do that. Most people serve way too much food at shabbos meals.
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