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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Simcha Section
amother
OP
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Sun, Oct 20 2019, 10:09 am
In flatbush how much is nice amount to give as a bar mitzvah present for a nephew? Its. Weekday affair. Want to give a check not a gift. Thanks for all input
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allthingsblue
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Tue, Oct 22 2019, 9:05 pm
$180 would probably be considered nice.
$360 is generous.
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amother
Cerulean
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 6:51 am
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amother
Natural
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 6:54 am
I have a lot of nephew bar Mitzvah, I always get them a leather esrog box. The bar mitzva boys love it, they feel so special using it, and it’s only $50
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amother
Emerald
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 7:33 am
allthingsblue wrote: | $180 would probably be considered nice.
$360 is generous. |
It depends which community but this sounds about right
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amother
Tangerine
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 8:22 am
amother [ Natural ] wrote: | I have a lot of nephew bar Mitzvah, I always get them a leather esrog box. The bar mitzva boys love it, they feel so special using it, and it’s only $50 |
That is so cool.
Maybe I should get that for Brother In Law?
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dankbar
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 8:52 am
Many people pool together money from entire family & get one bigger gift together. Like a silver becher, silver menorah or large full set of seforim that is more money etc
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shmosmom
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 8:55 am
amother [ Natural ] wrote: | I have a lot of nephew bar Mitzvah, I always get them a leather esrog box. The bar mitzva boys love it, they feel so special using it, and it’s only $50 |
Looking into this. Is it real leather or vegan leather?
Where do you get it?
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amother
Natural
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 9:17 am
shmosmom wrote: | Looking into this. Is it real leather or vegan leather?
Where do you get it? |
I honestly don’t know. I assume it’s real but don’t quote me on that. I live in Lakewood, all the judaica stores carry them around succos, but only Lakewood Judaica has them year round
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amother
OP
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 10:48 am
dankbar wrote: | Many people pool together money from entire family & get one bigger gift together. Like a silver becher, silver menorah or large full set of seforim that is more money etc |
We wouldnt do that. Different people in the family have different means so that wouldn’t work well.
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amother
Burgundy
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 11:55 am
amother [ OP ] wrote: | We wouldnt do that. Different people in the family have different means so that wouldn’t work well. |
My son had a Monsey Bar Mitzvah. The typical gift was $100, and pretty much everyone gave. My siblings gave $180. I assume Flatbush is fancier.
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amother
Crimson
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 3:13 pm
amother [ Cerulean ] wrote: | We give around $50-75 |
A gift is relative. For someone who isn’t poor, that would not be a nice size gift for a nephew. If it’s affordable, a more suitable amount would be ta least $200. Regular guests who aren’t related give at least $125 at a bar mitzvah these days.
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amother
Tan
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 3:22 pm
I give $50 for nephew Bar Mitzvah's. I used to give $100 but at this point I ka"h have about 3 a year.
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amother
Cerulean
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 3:52 pm
amother [ Crimson ] wrote: | A gift is relative. For someone who isn’t poor, that would not be a nice size gift for a nephew. If it’s affordable, a more suitable amount would be ta least $200. Regular guests who aren’t related give at least $125 at a bar mitzvah these days. |
Ka"h we had 5 bar mitzvahs and 4 weddings in the immediate family recently. I guess you'd rather I stay home if you were my sister-in-law and making a bar mitzvah.
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amother
Blue
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 6:54 pm
im oot. we do 50 to friends and 100 to nephews. we aren't rich or poor. we arent lacking but I wouldnt even describe us as comfortable. more like squeezed
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amother
Lawngreen
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 7:04 pm
omg, $180?? For every bar mitzvah??
We get a gift for under $50 and can’t imagine my other cash-strapped sibs and sibs-in-law are doing much differently. Kah, with the number of bar mitzvahs we have each year, a super-large gift expectation like this would just be another major financial stressor and goodness knows we have more than enough of those!
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allthingsblue
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Wed, Oct 23 2019, 7:21 pm
amother [ Lawngreen ] wrote: | omg, $180?? For every bar mitzvah??
We get a gift for under $50 and can’t imagine my other cash-strapped sibs and sibs-in-law are doing much differently. Kah, with the number of bar mitzvahs we have each year, a super-large gift expectation like this would just be another major financial stressor and goodness knows we have more than enough of those! |
She asked what's considered "nice," which I read to mean "better than decent/standard."
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amother
OP
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Thu, Oct 24 2019, 3:43 am
allthingsblue wrote: | She asked what's considered "nice," which I read to mean "better than decent/standard." |
Thanks. Thats is what I meant. He is an only son and we don't have many at this point so I felt like giving a nice gift. But for the others who have posted I do have sils whose husbands are in kollel and giving $36.
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