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What can I do as a zchus?



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rgh




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Nov 11 2019, 9:43 am
For my single friend who has never even dated yet because she has an older sister also not married? Crying Crying

I want so, so badly to help her, but there isn't anything I can do except pray....

I've heard of people lighting shabbos candles 5 min early, but I don't really understand why that would be a zchus; it's not particularly difficult for me-how exactly does it help?

I want something more specific and concrete than saying tehillim which of course helps.

Any ideas?
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tweety1




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Nov 11 2019, 10:01 am
No practical ideas. Just wanted to let you know you sound very caring and sensitive. Your friend is lucky to have you as a friend.
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OldYoung




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Nov 11 2019, 10:49 am
Lighting early as a zechus for a shidduch is sourced in "lecha dodi," in which Shabbos is called a "kallah." If we honor the Shabbos/kallah with this hidur of being mekabel Shabbos early (tosfos Shabbos) at this special eis ratzon (candle lighting), we should merit to experience another kallah.

I have heard that this is a suggestion from R' Chaim Kanievsky (but never verified myself).

Just wanted to share in case that gives any clarity. Smile
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ellacoe




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Nov 11 2019, 11:22 am
What can you choose that is concrete and of importance to you? It doesn't necessarily have to be marriage related. It could be something personal that you would like to improve or be more careful about. I.e being sure to say bracha achrona, is just an example, but something in your everyday life that you might want to implement.
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Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Nov 11 2019, 12:12 pm
OMG. SHE NEEDS A SHAILA YESTERDAY
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cbg




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Nov 11 2019, 12:16 pm
OldYoung wrote:
Lighting early as a zechus for a shidduch is sourced in "lecha dodi," in which Shabbos is called a "kallah." If we honor the Shabbos/kallah with this hidur of being mekabel Shabbos early (tosfos Shabbos) at this special eis ratzon (candle lighting), we should merit to experience another kallah.

I have heard that this is a suggestion from R' Chaim Kanievsky (but never verified myself).

Just wanted to share in case that gives any clarity. Smile


LOVE ❤️ this
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Cheiny




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Nov 11 2019, 12:18 pm
rgh wrote:
For my single friend who has never even dated yet because she has an older sister also not married? Crying Crying

I want so, so badly to help her, but there isn't anything I can do except pray....

I've heard of people lighting shabbos candles 5 min early, but I don't really understand why that would be a zchus; it's not particularly difficult for me-how exactly does it help?

I want something more specific and concrete than saying tehillim which of course helps.

Any ideas?


You’re a caring friend. You can say Shir Hashirim on Friday night for 40 days.
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